Chapter Eighteen - Home


    Chapter Eighteen - Home


    You want to buy a house? In this market? Are you delusional?


    -- Someone, 2023


    ***


    A favour, I repeated. What is it? You need dating help?


    Dating help? Delilah shook her head. No, why would I ask you for dating advice?


    Well, that was rude. Hey, why wouldnt you ask me for dating advice? Lucy and I have been steady for years. You think it was easy to convince her to date me?


    Delilah blinked, then looked away across the city. Okay, I hadnt thought of that. I guess I just figured you two somehow skipped the dating phase entirely.


    Well, we are both very horny, I admitted.


    Delilah sighed. I dont want to hear it, please. I just know Lucys putting ideas in Frannys head right now.


    I laughed, then swept some hair out of my face. I needed a haircut one of these days. Also, my hair was humid as fuck. It wasnt even raining yet the city managed to make it feel like it was. So, whats this favour? I asked.


    Its a little awkward, she said.


    I was already down to helping you with dating stuff, so I think were past the a little awkward phase.


    Delilah poked me in the short ribs with a knuckle. Dont be an ass, she said. Ive got... domestic problems.


    With Franny?


    No, not with Franny, shes... nevermind my relationship, its complicated, but not in a bad way. Its the rest thats a problem.


    You mean with where youre living? I walked over to one of the legs of the mech then sat down on it. The cat-like mech was sitting like a sphinx at the moment, so there was plenty of room to use it as a bench. A rather uncomfortable one, but still.


    Delilah looked around for a place to sit, then hopped backwards onto the head of my repair drone. The poor thing just sat there, frozen. Its the nuns, she said.


    The... oh, right, you live in a nunhouse.


    Its not called a nunhouse, Delilah said. Its a convent. And an orphanage and school and a few other things all rolled into one. I didnt mind staying in the dorms a few months ago, before... all of this. She gestured vaguely at the mecha and the house and the two of us.


    I took it to mean she was talking about all the samurai stuff. She became one a bit before me.


    But now its getting to be a bit much. The head of the convent is insisting that I get their rooms, the others are either fawning over me or tip-toeing around and... and Franny and I cant get a private moment anywhere. I dont mind the attention, and its nice to be treated well, but I grew up with these women.


    I dont have that much to move, she said.


    Good, less work for me, but I still expect free pizza out of it. I grinned, then glanced at the front door. Speaking of, think suppers ready?


    We stood and made our way back inside while chatting about homes and such. Delilah didnt have any house-related catalogues, but she did have a lot more points on hand than I did. She suggested pooling our resources a little to sabotage-proof the rest of the tower, which wasnt a terrible idea. Id placed a few turrets out and around the top floors already, to keep things safe, but with two samurai in the same building I expected that our security would need to climb a bit.


    Lucy was leaving the kitchen just as we got closer. Oh, cool, I was about to go fetch you. Come on, foods ready!


    Franny was just finishing up setting the table with bowls and utensils, four sets of them. Are the kittens eating with us?


    And making a mess? Lucy asked. Nah, I made enough for them, but they can eat out of paper bowls. Also, we need a cleaning bot.


    A cleaning bot? I asked.


    Yeah, like that repair drone you have. Theres stains on the stove that I cant get off, and Ill bet every last credit I have that the kittens will be turning this place into a dump before the months out.


    That.. was actually a fair point. Ill look into it, I said. In the meantime, wed just need to clean things like they did way back in the day; by hiring someone poorer than us to do it.


    Lucy brought the pot over to the table, then started to ladle food into our bowls. It was a brown gooey stuff with chunks of meat and... beans? Is this chilli? I asked.


    Oh, hey, I didnt mess it up so bad that its unrecognisable, Lucy said.


    It smells nice, I said.


    Its real meat! Lucy cheered. Or as real as what I could make with the printer, in any case.


    So... real meat that didnt come from an animal? I asked.


    Lucy shrugged. In her defence, it was probably better than the vat-grown shit we could order online.


    With everyone served, Lucy returned the pot to the kitchen, then called the kittens to get served. She very quickly handed over the job to Daniel though and returned to us.


    Im assuming you dont do prayer before eating, Delilah said.


    I dont do praying in general, I said.


    She shrugged, then took a spoonful. Hmm, this is good, she said.


    I took a spoonful, shoved it in my mouth, and chewed for a bit before my eyes started to water and my mouth started to burn. Lucy, why is this so hot? I asked.


    Lucy frowned. Was it a tablespoon of pepper, or a cup? she muttered.


    ***