<b>Chapter </b><b>37 </b>


    It’s the frantic pushing against me from my luna that brings me quickly from my bliss to the hardened reality that I live. Sex has never been normal for my luna. She has refused from the moment she left Fire Moon pack to talk about what she went through there.


    It was two years after we moved her into the pack house that I was able to confirm what I already suspected, that she had indeed been sexually abused. You would have never noticed her strange behavior as it only urred around men. How quiet and timid she got when in a room full of men versus the friendly, happy youngdy she was in mixedpany.


    The worst was when she was alone with me. She was terrified. Visibly shaking the entire time she was alone with me yet as soon as I stood anywhere near her she was all over me. Kissing my lips, wrestling my tongue, grinding against my hardness beneath my jeans.


    I epted the make out sessions greedily as my father had suggested right from the beginning that he felt she had endured years of sexual training to prepare her for her mate but discouraged anything further until she was eighteen and she had an opportunity to get away from the abuse.


    Even with her being my mate I respected her and my father and I waited for the frantic way she needed to get into my pants to settle down. It was on her eighteenth birthday that dad finally announced that she was my mate, confirming the pack rumors going around as to the reason she was brought back from our trip to Fire Moon. That was also the day he announced the date for our uing mate’s union ceremony for next month’s full moon. This gave my mom and her omega helpers a month to prepare for the ceremony, while Lilly and I only had a month to move into a new house outside the pack house or to a couples apartment on the third floor.


    It’s after the mate’s union ceremony that the newly mated couples are expected toplete the mating bond, to mark one another while in the throws of hard, passionate sex. Marking one another seconds before you orgasm is supposed to enhance the sexual experience. Something Lily and I have never experienced.


    It was that night, while I was hanging out with her in her room that she told me a general idea of what happened to her. How her dad started kissing her like he kissed her step mom at six years old. How every time she wasmanded to take her clothes off he would hurt her; either punishing her harshly for refusing or the training itself hurt. Simply put, being naked in the same room as a male was always physically and mentally painful.


    It was the only time that I argued fervently with my father. I knew she wasn’t ready toplete the mating bond and I refused to force it on her after she told me what little bit she was willing to tell. It took days of arguing with him before he told me that Alpha Tanner admitted to abusing her and fully understood the situation I was in with Lilly.


    While he was steadfast on the ceremony happening, exining that because she was now eighteen it was necessary to mark her as mine. He also took the time to exin that it was eptable to hold off onpleting the bond as long as we marked each other. That sex was simply the easiest way to handle the marking and that the marking distracts from the pain of the first tie, as all woman, virgins or not, will have mild pain with the first several ties.


    I’ve always tried to avoid pinning her down ormanding submission from her since she’s never fully exined to me what happened and dad exined that the mostmon way to subject a child to such training was to subject them to both.


    It’s as her panic attack deepens that I realize how mentally sensitive she really is right now. She’s fighting with everything her five foot eight inch, 120 pound petite frame has but it’s only as she starts lifting herself off the bed trying to shove me off of her that she manages enough strength to pull herself away from me.