《Plagiarism in Another World》


 1 The Star

    Hi I''m Mu Sic and right around me is Nothing... absolutely nothing.


    Then light and a voice appeared in my head.


    ;) hello user you are being transported to another world because you hit such a wickedly sick note that you shattered the space-time continuum.


    "Huh, what do you mean "Another World" I like my old world take me fucking back!"


    ;) Sorry user but the space-time continuum can only be broken once by each being in reality.


    "Oh OK, that makes a lot of sense. Whatever, so when will we get there voice in my head?"


    ;) as soon as you are good enough at singing to be considered the best in reality.


    "What...HOW THE FUCK AM I GOING TO DO THAT!"


    ;) don''t worry user the voice will help you by providing you a progress bar to show how you are doing as soon as you reach max on that you may leave.


    (Singer Help In Travel acquired, otherwise known as S.H.I.T)


    "Voice what''s with this goddamn name it doesn''t even describe it"


    ;) I thought it was funny


    "It''s not, now how do I use this thing"


    ;) just think "Practice" and it will start


    "Ok, well what am I going to sing"


    ;) I don''t know just pick one of the songs from your past world.


    "Isn''t that plagiarism though?"


    ;) who cares your in the abyss.


    "Alright." Practice Mu thought


    Progress: 1,245-1,000,000,


    "What the hell is this number!"


    ;) it''s the number that will signify how much longer you have till you become the best


    "Then why do I already have some progress"


    ;) well you were a musician so it does make sense that you would have some progress.


    The amounts go like this


    0-250: Normal beings


    250-1,000: Beings who do a lot of karaoke


    1,000-2,500:Beings who are musicians


    2,500-10,000: Beings who are musical in nature


    10,000-50,000:Beings who need music to live


    50,000- 200,000: Beings who have surpassed normality and are magically singing


    200,000-999,999: Gods, and Demons who are musical


    1,000,000: Only You


    "Hey voice, what''s with that last one?"


    ;) as it says it is the number only you who possesses enough potential can reach.


    "Oh so am I special."


    ;) yeeahhh you could say that


    "Shut up."


    Afterwords Mu goes through a training montage worthy of a certain boxing movie for an indefinite amount of time. Until finally


    *DING!*


    "Oh God why is that always so loud" Practice Mu thought.


    Progress: 1,000,000-1,000,000


    ;) Max reached user you may now leave the abyss knowing that you are in fact the most musical being in existence.


    "YES! YES! YEA! FUCK YEA! I''M LEAVING" Mu yelled into the abyss, " Fuck you my prison no longer shall you keep me upon your dark abode."


    ;) Geez dramatic much *eye roll*


    "Did you just write out "eye roll"."


    ;) that''s not important what is important however is that you will be leaving in 5..4..3..2..1..0.


    The abyss started converting into a myriad of color ,some of which don''t even have a name.


    Then *Poof* Mu is falling and falling right into a giant lake where one family is having a picnic.


    "MOM! A man just fell from the sky!" Yelled a little girl who was presumably apart of the family.


    "Oh that''s great dear." Said the mother. All the while Mu was swimming his way out of the lake which was a real struggle due to its size but he eventually came up to the family.


    " Hello I''m Mu do you know where I am?" He asked acting like he hadn''t just fallen from the sky.


    "Hmm," the father said while raising his eyebrow. "Why you are on the property of me Duke Ass of the famous Ass family. Now tell me what are you doing here before I call the guards."


    The pompous Man named Ass asked. "OH, I''m" but before he could finish the man laughed and said," I don''t care I already called the guards."


    Then about 20 dignified looking people in armor walked out of the forest. "Halt! you have broken the law, return your stolen... uh I mean get off this land or pay with your blood!"

 2 FIGH

    "Ok well I can see that there has been a misunderstanding happens all the time in these sorts of situations." Mu said to Duke Ass. "No there is no misunderstanding I am a dignified member of the Ass family and you are on my land. So guards if you would please do your job." Duke Ass said as the guards were slowly approaching Mu. " I''m not a violent man Duke Ass so please." However, Mu couldn''t talk no more as one of the guards was rushing him about to shoulder tackle him to the ground. So Mu did the only thing he could think of something he had done so much it was ingrained as a muscle memory. He sang, now before I go on I need to go over the effects and overall OP-ness,hah penis.


    1. His music can hypnotize any creature with a lower singing power, so anyone.


    2. His music can alter the minds and bodies of the people who hear it, think of this like a status effect, this can be done to both harm and help.


    3. He can do more than just sing to cause these effect, even though I call it singing, he can hum, beat hit feet, clap his hands, and etc.


    4. He doesn''t need an instrument his a cappella is basically the same as a real instrument.


    5. He can make multiple sounds at once creating an entire ensemble at once.


    6. He can project his voice to cover as big a crowd as he needs


    7.He can effect the environment around him using his singing


    P.S. he knows all of this from the training montage by testing it all on himself. Examples include; once loosing himself to his own music hence hypnotizing himself.


    As the words fell out of his mouth from the very first note the guards stopped, the ass family stopped, birds stopped, even the air would have stopped if he wanted it. Now what did he sing well the guards nor the noble family knew but he sure did Mu was singing "Seven Nation Army by The White Stripes". Because it was the first fight song that entered his head and who is going to get on him for plagiarism in a whole other world. This song caused the people around him to feel a sense of dread as if they were facing an entire army all by themselves, except the kids of course he''s not a monster. They instantly cowered away from Mu crying and I think Duke Ass just proved his family name right. " As I said before", Mu started saying after he had finished singing," I am not a violent man and this IS all a misunderstanding." The Duke shook his head slowly and said," Of course sir Bard we would never try anything against an esteemed one such as yourself. Guards get someone to take his Bard-ship to the gate and give him direction to wherever he wants to go, and if you ever need anything just ask me." The Duke said whilst hiding in his wife''s bosom...tits. Mu started walking away following the guard who was assigned to him. While walking to the gate he was replaying the scene that had just transpired and wondered one thing. "What''s a Bard?" Mu asked the guard who wouldn''t look him in the eye. "Umm, don''t you know sir?" The guard asked," No I don''t, enlighten me before I enlighte... kill you." Mu said trying and failing at a pun. " Um well sir they are magic singers who use the power of their voice to effect the world around them." The guard said, Hmmm kinda sounds like a certain character from a video game who also uses a voice hmmmm Mu thought. "They have a guild in the city if you would like to see them" the guard proposed. " Tsk Cliche." Mu said thinking out loud," Hey where are we by the way." Mu asked. The guard looked over perplexed then remembered that he fell out of the sky," Oh we are in the Asshole Dukedom of The Kingdom of Rich ruled by King Perfect." The guard said, " Oh ok then where is the guild." Mu asked," You take a right when you leave the castle, pass road ambush, turn left at the blacksmiths, and then it''s the biggest building on the right." The guard said as they walked out the gates, " Thanks see ya!" Mu said as he walked away.


    (If you''re wondering how the people of this world are effected by our worlds music it will be explained at the guild)

 3 The Guild

    Mu was rounding the blacksmiths when he saw it The Guild," Holy Shit, that is huge." The guild was about two times the size of every building around it and looked like a mini manor. He walked in and noticed that there was almost no one there except for a girl screaming unintelligible words to a beat and one guy behind a desk. " Hello sir are you the receptionists?" Mu asked walking up to the man," Who else here could be?." The receptionists said with an accusatory gaze. "Umm no sir I just wondered because usually a woman is the receptionists in these kinds of places." Mu said thinking about the cliche. "Yea well fuck you I''ve wanted to be a receptionist my entire life and everybody said I couldn''t." The receptionist said with his voice ringing out into the guild. "Ok sir I can see that now so what can you tell me about the guild." Mu said wanting to get past his mistake. "Well we are the bards guild. We give out missions and venues to bards to let them get a start in this world." The receptionist said immediately sounding like a robot. "So what the hell is she doing?" Mu said. "She is singing to practice for one of her missions." Said the receptionist. Mu looked quizzically over at her and said,"How is that singing I don''t understand a thing she is saying." "Well you don''t have to understand it to feel its effects." "Oh ok well how do I register." The receptionist disappeared under the desk and brought out weird looking horn. "You just need to sing or play an instrument into this and it will tell us wether you qualify and where you rank on the bard scale." The receptionist responded handing over the horn. "Ok well what are the scales?" Mu asked knowing it was probably E,D,C,B,A, and S. "They are like this; E,D,C,B,A, and S." The receptionist said thinking he had just blown this guys mind. Called it Mu thought. "Ok well when do I start?" Mu asked,"Now if you want or we can provide you a room." The receptionist said,"I''ll take a room then, oh yea and what''s your name?" Mu asked while the receptionist started guiding him towards and upstairs room." Huh well my name is The Receptionist." Said The Receptionist as if it was the most ordinary name ever. "Well here is your room key sir it is right here number 69 and if you need anything just yell." The Receptionist said with a smile. The receptionist and Mu thought,"Nice" as they walked apart. As Mu walked in he saw the entire room was wooden with nothing in it. "Ok well what am I going to sing." Mu said to absolutely "no one" then he had an idea. "The Jeopardy Theme because this place is boring." So one round of Jeopardy later and Mu is walking out of the room horn in hand. He placed it on the receptionist desk with a dramatic flair and said," Rate Me! Rate me all you want." "Ok sir well could you calm down no one is going to rate you here you are safe." The Receptionist said with a calming voice. "No, I know your a Rateist it''s your job." Mu said," Well yes sir it is but it is necessary." "Ok," Mu said ready to get rated. The Receptionist disappeared Into the back and came back with a shocked look and a Bard card. "You..You..You are an S ranked bard." "Haha I know," Mu said with a face befitting of even the Asshole family. "W..well just right your name here and we will be done I will rate you no longer." The Receptionist said looking sad. "Do not worry The Receptionist," Mu said while writing his name on the card. "You can rate me anytime you want." Then Mu left swishing his nonexistent tailcoat.

 4 First Venue Part 1

    "Oh wait." Said Mu as he remembered he forgot to get a mission from the guild. "Well I just can''t walk back in there that last conversation was like a fever dream." Conveniently however at that moment a man bumped into Mu who looked like he was about to have a heart attack. "Oh God, oh god, oh god." The man kept mumbling under his breath. "Hey man are you alright?" Mu asked worrying for this poor souls health. The mans eyes darted towards Mu "No you fuck do I look alright my goddamn bard that I hired had to go and get himself killed right before the busiest day of the year." The man said venting out his frustrations on Mu. "Yea well calm the fuck down I''m a bard I can help you." Mu said trying to calm the man down. "Oh alright then do you accept exposure as payment because I put all my money on the other bard." "As a matter of fact I do but I keep all my tips." Mu said thinking that this was his chance. "Oh really but one question what the hell are tips is that some kind of perverted way of people paying you?" The man asked about to bolt away from the conversation. "Really you have all this other shit and you''re even speaking my language but you don''t know what a tip is." Mu thought thinking this was all one sick joke to make him look worse. "Umm, no it''s nothing perverted it''s just that I get to keep all the money people donate to me for playing for them." Mu said. "Why the hell would they do that? Look I could give you food and a place to sleep if you really are a bard and I deem you good enough to play tonight." The man said coming to a realization that this man is probably homeless considering that he is just giving away his services. "Ok well this should prove my worth." Mu said as he brought out his bard card. "Let me see." The man said before his eyes popped out when he saw the giant S on the card. The man then fell to the ground and said," Please forgive me dear bard for I could not see Mt.Tai, whatever that is, may I be apart of the Asshole family in my next life as punishment." "It''s alright but can I play at your... what business do you own." Mu said realizing he didn''t know. "An inn and yes I would be humbled if you would play at my establishment." So Mu and the man walked back towards his inn with Mu asking questions about him and his establishment. He found out his name was Innkeeper and his inn was named The First Venue. It was a two story building with the first story made of stone and the second story made of wood. Inside it looked like a typical inn you would imagine. Except for the big stage in the middle where Mu presumed he would play tonight and the 14 tables all nearly packed already. "Hey!" Yelled Innkeeper getting everyone''s attention," This here is the bard who will be playing tonight he is S ranked so great him with respect." Everyone grumbled saying things like "Yea right, we''re just extras anyways," and," Your gonna leave it on a cliffhanger after this sentence anyways."

 5 The First Venue 2

    "Shut Up!" Yelled The Innkeeper "He is our Bard and don''t forget that you all get free drinks tonight as long as you stay in character." "What do you mean in character?" Mu asked truly pe..prr..perplexed (damn stutter). "Didn''t I tell you this is our busiest night it''s when we get the most heroes in our inn in one night." The Innkeeper said."What do you mean most heroes?" Mu said wondering if he was one such hero."Well a hero is many things but usually it''s someone not from this world who has some quest to do." The Innkeeper said." Most importantly though is that most of the heroes don''t know our currency so they pay in fucking gold coins." The Innkeeper said with greed in his eyes. "Oh Ok." Is all Mu said while happy dancing in his head saying "I''m a hero" over and over again.


    ;) No your not


    "Holy shit voice is that you?" Mu said excited to see his maybe jailer.


    ;) No*hiding*


    "Did you just type out hiding."


    ;) I''m just here to correct your mistake you are not a hero you are a bard


    "Oh ok well see ya" Mu said crying manly tears. "Well are you going to get up there." The Innkeeper said completely forgetting he was talking to an S-rank bard. "Yea." When Mu stepped up on the stage he noticed it was actually larger than he thought and made of wood. Mu has just sang, "Stolen Dance, by Milky Chance", and "Hail To The King, by Avenged Sevenfold". When suddenly a teenager in modern clothes walked in. "I guess this is one of those heroes," Mu thought wondering how he got here although his clothes might as well scream summoning gone wrong cheat skill gained. "Hey wait what the hell am I wearing." Mu thought as he looked down and saw that he was wearing the same thing as everyone else. "Convenient" Mu thought thinking about how lazy a person would have to be to not even explain how he got his clothes. The teenager started speaking," Hi I''m *Insert Generic Name Here* and I would like one beer please." *Insert Generic Name Here* slapped down two gold coins. "Ah sir it''s just one more gold coin for food." The Innkeeper said all nice with greed in his eyes. "Ah why not The Demon Lord can''t be slain on an empty stomach!" *Insert Generic Name Here* shouted that last part. Mu whispered to one of the other people in the audience. "Is there actually a demon lord?" "No this guys story will probably be dropped before then, but ignorance is bliss if he doesn''t know that than why care." The audience member said."Who the fuck said that!" *Insert Generic Name Here* screamed.

 6 Hero

    "I''m the great hero of the golden age who are you!" *Insert Generic Name Here* screamed pointing his finger at Mu. "Just a bard." Mu said trying to look as cool as possible. "Exactly! I have the legendary God Slaying Dragon King Demon Killer Goddess Champion Emperor King Hero Class and you say I will be dropped!" "I slay villages like this for breakfast whenever my Goth Dragon Princess harem doesn''t talk me out of it." *Insert Generic Name Here* said while holding his head high. "Doesn''t that make you worse than whatever demon lord you are going to kill." Mu said stating the obvious. "No because I feel bad about all the people I kill." *Insert Generic Name Here* (who''s name is Archangel Solomon the Third Immortal of Elements) said. "Ok well no need to slay this town okay just eat your soup and listen to me sing." Mu said trying to calm the "Hero" down. *Insert Generic Name Here* then puffed out his chest and said," Hmm very well then let''s here the trash sing." Mu walked back up to stage and kept thinking about the worst way to humiliate the "Hero". Then Mu had a bright idea," What if I just imbue my words with my power." Mu thought.


    ;) Not possible you must sing to give anything power even if it is one word


    "Okay... hey wait your back." Mu thought getting confused.


    ;) Nope


    "Fucking piece of Shit." Mu thought but he had already arrived at the center of the stage and had a brilliant plan. Mu created a beat with his feat and then said one word directing all the power behind it to *Insert Generic Name Here* ,"FEAR!!" Mu screamed looking * Insert Generic Name Here* in the eye. The effect was immediate *Insert Generic Name Here* fell off his chair, turned pale, pissed his pants, and then passed out (in that order). "Somebody carry him out please." Mu said hoping to get back to the show. "Yes sir," The Innkeeper said suddenly remembering he was S-ranked. He then snapped his fingers and one of his bouncers came over and tried to lift him up but couldn''t. "Sir this guy must way at least 420 tons." The Bouncer said. "Well then just leave him there, and let''s move on he''s not the only hero in the world." The Innkeeper sighed wondering how much money he had just missed out on. Mu then continued the show and heroes came and went spending thousands of gold coins. Mu crashed out in his room some of the heroes had also gotten rooms but they were out chasing away assassins who had sneaked in to try to kill them. The Innkeeper said it happens all the time and nobody can stop it so he gave up years ago. Mu slipped peacefully into his first sleep in a new world.

 7 Accepting the Ques

    Mu woke up disorientated because he didn''t just see endless darkness but instead the sky. "WHAT THE FUCK WHAT HAPPENED TO THE INN?!" Mu screamed looking for The Innkeeper. The Innkeeper walked up behind him and tapped his shoulder. Mu turned around and asked him the question. "Oh yea probably some demon lord or something happens at least every once a week." The Innkeeper said while pulling out a pouch of gold. "Here I forgot to warn you about it so here''s some compensation." Mu took the money still confused," How are you going to open another inn and survive." The Innkeeper looked at him like he had three heads,"Don''t you remember how much money I made last night I''ll just build another one using that." Mu had a sudden realization,"Oh yea you could probably make a grand inn with that much money." The Innkeeper said,"No you don''t realize the hero''s don''t expect a grand inn. They just want some run down inn, which helps me save a lot of money." Mu thought this Innkeeper was a real sly dog working the system like this. "Well I can''t stay here anymore I''ll be staying at the bards guild if you need anything." Mu started walking away hoping that the guild is full so him and The Receptionist don''t have to meet. Mu walked in and saw that it actually was full all the bards must be back then. He looked around and saw a some interesting characters. Then he saw the big board of quest which everyone was clamoring around. He walked up and started looking for some S-rank quest or venues. Then he saw it.


    Quest Type- National


    Requires- A or S rank


    Description- The King is looking for entertainment for his daughters sixteenth birthday and wants only the best. Come see Mike the Royal Treasurer for more information and screening.


    "Might as well I feel like this place is a little too crazy for me and I don''t want to stay here." Mu ripped the quest off the wall and anxiously walked over to The Receptionist. "Mu, have you come to be rated again?" The Receptionist said with stars in his eyes." N..no I just wanna take this quest." Mu sheepishly laid the paper down on the desk."ahh yes the new National quest for our dear king, well just wait here I''ll get it certified in your name." The Receptionist left and came back with an envelope."Just hand this to the person who sent out the quest and they will see if they want you or not, that would be Mike in this case."Mu tried to grab the envelope but couldn''t move it from The Receptionist hands,"We do provide basic gear and equipment for anyone leaving the guild on a quest but I think I won''t give it to you unless you do something for me." Mu got scared,"Wh..what would that be?." The Receptionist smiled, "Oh I think you know." (The chapter ends to the sounds of Mu screaming)

 8 The Journey To the Capital

    Mu walked out of the bard''s guild overstuffed with basic survival gear including flint and steel, a tent, the pokey thing you roast food on, and The Receptionist home address... wait what. So after Mu burned the home address note he walked up to a villager and asked them where a map shop is. He got directed towards the north side of town to a ramshackle little hut. Mu walked in and saw a man behind a counter sleeping. "*Cough* um sir." The mans eyes suddenly flew open,"Ah the Spanish Inquisition." Mu looked perplexed,"What? I''m just here to buy a map to the Capital." The man looked at him and sighed,"Thank god those bastards are everywhere." The man rummaged around under his counter and came back up with a dusty map. "Best map I got right here tell you whatever you want to know where something is... wait that''s not right.. it..will..tell you where whatever it is is." Mu looked at it and said," Ok how much." The man looked at him and said," 9 silver." "Can you split a gold coin?" Mu said feeling like one of those damn heroes but it was all he had. "Do I look like I can split a gold." The man said waving his hand around his store. "No sir just take the whole thing." Mu said handing over the gold and taking the map. Mu looked at the map and saw that the road to the Capital was actually kind of small just about two middle fingers west (He never learned how to read a map). Mu headed out the west gate and traveled for an entire day before he realized he didn''t get any food. Mu started wondering how to get food,"Ok I don''t know how to skin an animal so I have to eat plants but how to know if they are poisonous?" Then Mu had an idea he could just rob the next person coming down the road they won''t even remember. As the old saying goes with great power comes an easier life at the expense of others. So Mu waited and waited then he finally saw it. An entire caravan full of people guarded heavily but that''s no worry. Mu walked out and waited for them to reach him then he started singing "The Highwayman by The Highwaymen". The entire caravan stopped and acted like they were in a trance. Experiencing multiple life''s for exactly 3 minutes and 10 seconds while this was happening. Mu had located there food wagon and started stealing enough to hold him over for the entire ride then he ran away. Mu kept walking for two more days until he realized the Capital wasn''t as close as he thought but he kept moving. Until he got hit over the head by...a coconut? Then he saw a monkey laughing up in the trees, "I knew this would happen it was just a matter of when." Mu started cursing because of this goddamn cliche," Everyone let''s you go you damn monkey but not me your dead meat now." Mu then did the same thing he did to *Insert Name Here* and the monkey fell out of the tree frozen in fear. "Haha your day of reckoning has come cliche monkey." Mu then found the coconut that it used against him and threw it so hard at its face that it shattered the monkeys jaw and knocked it out. "No more laughing for you," Mu said in his deepest voice.3 days of nothing later Mu arrived in the Capital.

 9 The Capital

    Mu walked up to the capitals gate and joined the line being formed outside to get in. There were multiple deaths in that line either because some young master offended some genius or tried to cut line. But for Mu it was a pretty straight forward process he got up to the gate and was handed a paper he had to fill out to get in. (Example Below)


    1. Are you a other worldly being of unimaginable strength and if so do you intend to do harm to the Capital.


    A. No


    2. Do you have a skill to counter-fit our money or produce gold out of nothing (we don''t want you flooding our economy)


    A. No


    3.Are you here for business or personal reasons.


    A. Business


    After Mu handed in his questions the guard reviewed it then handed Mu a medallion and asked for the 1 gold entry fee. As Mu walked in he suddenly saw something out of the corner of his eye it was a horde of old men running toward him. All of them were shouting ," Join my Martial Way,(Insert Name Here, we can make you strong." The horde seemed to lock onto Mu collectively and surrounded him whispering to each other, "hmm, he doesn''t have trash talent I can''t teach him," or," hmm his talent is not god level I can''t teach him." Apparently if you have just medium talent no ancient master can teach you. They just sighed and said," He''s even worse than trash... he''s not trash."Then they all disappeared in an instant probably to go find some half dead young man to teach there martial way to. Mu started walking his way towards the big ass castle which he guessed was the Kings he had to ask for directions from solely the guards as seemingly every other person had their own language they spoke. As he got to the castles gate a guard stopped him and asked his business. Mu responded by simply handing over the quest and his bard card and saying," I''ve come for the birthday quest handed out to all bards." The guard face suddenly went pale and he said," Ye..yes Sir. right this way Sir. Bard." The guard led him towards the royal treasures wing of the castle they were stopped by some passing guards and knights who were going to stop another assassination attempt. "Does that happen everyday." Mu asked the guard,he didn''t ask the guards name because he knew it would be something like "The Guard" or some shit. "Uh yes sir it does there is an entire unit built to solely stop them every day, nobody really knows where they come from. But if they make it through that unit then whoever is dating the princess at that time usually stops them." After that they just walked in silence until they came to a 8 ft. Tall wooden door labeled "Treasurers Office". Sir. Mike Cox-long the royal treasurer is in here Sir. Bard."

 10 Meeting The Royal Treasurer/ The Golden Cord Inn

    After Mu said goodbye to the guard he pushed open the door, and saw a man standing behind a large desk looking out his window. "Hmmm, if a police officer gets rid of crime, then if they succeeded there would be no need for police officers. So if you think about it a police officers job is to get rid of police officers." Sir. Cox-long said while stroking his beard. Mu walked in and coughed to get his attention Sir. Cox-long turned around realizing someone had come into his office. "Oh hello," Sir. Cox-long said completely forgetting his previous philosophical thoughts. "Hello I''m Mu Sic a bard and I''m here to try out for the birthday quest." Mu said while handing over his letter and his Bard card. "S-rank huh, yea you can have it the party will be in a 3 days so have everything you need by then." Sir. Cox-long said after reading the letter and seeing the Bard card. Mu was perplexed though and said," What about the screening?" Sr. Cox-long looked at him and said,"You''re S-rank why would I need to screen you I''m surprised one of you even came here." Mu was just left wondering on how rare an S-rank actually was,"Well what if the card is fake?" Mu said,"You see that mark right there." Sir. Cox-long said while pointing at a barely discernible mark made of some alloy Mu didn''t know."That mark and alloy are only on authentic cards because only the Bards Guild has the machine and alloy to do it."Sir. Cox-long said. "What if someone just stole one of the machines and alloy?" Mu said thinking this system was easily exploitable. "They would be hunted down to the ends of the world by the Bards Guild.So I guess if you''ve got the balls to take on one the worlds strongest guilds sure you could steal one. Oh wait they weigh something like a ton." Sir. Cox-long said thinking the conversation over. "Now unless you have more question I have sent someone to get you a room at the Golden Cord Inn best in the city it''s just outside the gates and to the left." Sir. Cox-long said looking back out the window resuming his ongoing philosophical question. Mu left the room afterward and started towards the Golden Cord Inn. He arrived outside what he presumed was the inn but instead of a lute or something he saw something which looks quite similar to a golden umbilical cord drawn above it. "Oh it''s not a chord it''s a cord like an umbilical cord...that''s just disgusting." Mu thought as he walked into The Golden Cord and saw a pretty normal and yet somehow high-end inn which had a giant roaring fire on one side of the common place, with what looks like an umbilical cord hanging above it. He walked to the counter and called the bartender over,"Hello I''m Mu Sic Sir. Cox-long should have made reservations for me, and could you tell me the story behind this place?" The bartender picked up a big book from under her counter and started looking through it until she presumably got to Mu''s name. "Ahh, yes Sir. Sic we have been expecting you and our inns story is right here." The bartender handed over a piece of paper and asked Mu if he wanted anything to eat. Mu accepted their paper and said," Yes mam I''ll have whatever the special is today, and could you bring it to my room." As Mu walked up to his room he read the paper which said.


    Years ago before The Golden Cord


    our founders family were just simple


    owners of an inn called,"The


    Unimportant One." It made decent


    money but nothing like it could


    then the day of our founders birth


    he came out and was attached to his


    mother by one golden umbilical cord.


    The family took this as a sign and kept


    the cord which never seemed to


    degrade and when the founder reached


    of age he took over and changed the


    inn into what it is now today.


    "Wow fascinating," Mu thought as he laid on his bed and waited for his food. He got it and it was most likely the balls of some creature from their shape but they did taste good. As Mu went to sleep thankful of being able to sleep on a bed after days of sleeping on the ground.

 11 The Forced Ques

    Mu woke up and hesitantly opened his eyes expecting to see the sky again however the inn was still there.


    But Mu could only stare at the ceiling for so long and even though he doesn''t need to prepare for the party. He still makes a point to progress the story when he can.


    So he got up and started progressing towards the inns common room. He had to pass a few bodies which the inn couldn''t carry away fast enough but he made it there without conflict.


    He noticed that the person behind the bar had changed, "Hey what happened to the other lady bartender?" Mu asked the "new" bartender.


    "She went home she only works night shift." The "new" bartender said. "Oh well that''s too normal." Mu thought while looking at the bartender.


    "So are you here about the rat problem." The bartender said like he was a robot speaking a pre-programmed script. "Uh no I''m just sleeping here until the princesses party I''m the bard." Mu said but it had no effect on the bartender."You must want something for this job I''ll give you 2 copper coins and a free meal, please we are desperate." He didn''t look desperate though he almost looked bored.


    "No sir I would rather not deal with any rats." Mu said walking away from the obviously bored barkeep. "If you don''t help me I won''t tell you where they took your sister." The barkeep said in his monotone voice.


    "I''m an only child," Mu said wondering what this guy had smoked. "I won''t tell you were the treasure is." The barkeep said trying again.


    "I don''t need any treasure," Mu answered. They went on like this for about 5 minutes with the barkeeper promising some information or gift and Mu saying he didn''t need it.


    Now the reason why Mu didn''t just leave was because the fucking door was locked and Mu doesn''t like destroying property. "Ok for fucks sake I''ll kill your damn rats!" Mu screamed cursing this man and all his descents to always have to work minimum wage (and they did).


    The bartender then said,"Thank you sir we are truly in your debt." As he was leading Mu to the back and into the cellar.


    It wasn''t that bad of a problem actually just a few rats with a big rat leading them but you could totally see the evidence of countless battles that have taken place in this cellar you could probably date them back to the founding of this inn.


    This includes swords, clothes, and fucking skeletons, literally there were two skeletons laying on top of each other looking like they were in the middle of having sex.


    But Mu just ignored it and killed the rats all at once like the pied piper except Mu isn''t a child molester.


    Anyways he got the job done, got paid, ate his meal, and walked out of the inn into the streets.

 12 Taking a Kid to an Orphanage/The Strange Blacksmith

    As Mu walked into the streets it was relatively calm which was strange because everyone here could bring down gods. But then again I guess if everyone is strong then no one is strong. Mu was wondering on what he wanted to do as he wandered around the city when he had an idea. "I''m gonna get some equipment to make me look cool," Mu thought.


    ;) What Mu doesn''t know is that he can''t look cool


    "Well your just comedic relief and have no body so you totally can''t look cool" Mu thought back at the voice.


    ;) My name is The Abyss so yeah I''m kinda cool


    "Yea I guess in an edgy emo kinda way." Mu thought laughing at the voice completely skipping the fact that the voice is literally the abyss.


    ;) Fuck you I''m nothing like what those fucks say I am.


    "Ok your not, jokes over." Mu thought.


    Now while he was thinking these thoughts he was thoughting more thinks on what he will buy. He went through his options hat, coat, monocle, and then he thinked the biggest thought he had ever had. "It''s all coming together." Mu thought after his think.


    Now while he was reciting Doctor Seuss and getting lost in his own mind the real world slapped him in the face.


    "Screw this damn baby." He heard and he saw a man in an inn throw a baby out the window coincidentally right at him. Mu caught the baby and he saw it had a ancient dragon necklace around its neck. Now Mu being a rational human being thought,"Well this kid is some part dragon so this is probably this kids origin story. I''m not gonna be the parent to some useless hero, hero parents always either die or get put in there kids shadow.


    He will be better off in an orphanage those heroes are usually cool-er." So Mu asked around and after searching for a good non-evil child sacrificing demon infested orphanage(which was actually kind of hard). He finally found one and just gave the kid to the really young mistress of the orphanage.


    "Ok so were was I," Mu thought to get back to his thinks which he had thought before (that is the last time I''m doing that) "Oh yeah I think a cane would be cool, but not one of those weird evil villain obsidian black canes with a sword inside just a regular wooden one with a curve." So Mu started asking around the Capital to get to the center market. He was walking the direction a guard had pointed when he saw a sign.


    JOHN''S AMAZING BLACKSMITHING


    "Well I found my blacksmith," Mu thought. So he walked into the shop and noticed it was nice and tidied but not to nice just the right amount. "Hello Sir. what can I do you for." A man who had come out of the back said to Mu as he walked in. "Are you John," Mu asked. "No I''m a god what do you think of course I''m John, full name John Totally-Not-A-God" John Totally-Not-A-God said while wiping sweat off of him,"See I sweat just like a regular human I am totally not a god. "Ok well I don''t care can I just have a regular wooden cane that''s been hollowed out in the middle so that it makes a nice sound." "Ok so you want a regular wooden cane inlaid with obsidian and sprinkled with stardust with a fire gold top." John said,"Yes just a regular wood... hey wait what was it you said." Mu stumbled,"A regular wooden cane." John said," No after that though you said something." Mu explained," Oh yea the obsidian inlay, stardust crumbs, and a fire gold top." John said like it was the most normal thing in the world. "I don''t want those though," Mu said to John. "Really do you just want a regular wooden cane well that''s gonna cost you extra." John said. "Why it''s just wood," Mu was flabbergasted. "Just wood..do you know how rare "just wood" is around here there is only rare or otherworldly materials around here due to the power centered in this area." Mu had a feeling that this made sense in a strange way. "Alright whatever how much," Mu asked John. "Umm how about that whole bag of gold there." John said pointing at the bag containing all of Mu''s money," Are you serious." Mu asked,"As serious as a god... which I am not." John said," Alright but how long will you take." Mu asked, "A few minutes." Mu just accepted this as he had the sneaking suspicion that this guy was a god.

 13 Receiving the Cane/ Inbred Royal Family

    Mu really did just have to wait a few minutes before John came back out with a perfect wooden cane which made a nice sound when it hit the ground.


    "Ok so it''s not my best work but it should be godly...but not to godly because I''m not a god." John said as he handed the cane over to Mu. The cane was made of what looked like a sequoia tree.


    "Thanks John but I''ve been meaning to ask you. I didn''t know blacksmiths made things out of wood I thought I would have to go to a carpenter. How did you make this?" Mu asked while handing over all his money to John.


    John responded without thinking and said," Well when you are a god of crafting... I.I mean when your as skilled as me it''s pretty easy to do anything." John then excused himself but not before saying,"Umm I''m moving the shop to a new city so I''m not gonna be here if you need it fixed."


    Then the entire store started vibrating and then !BOOM! It exploded into the sky.


    However, not before Mu had left the store leaving him just staring into the sky. "Wait I thought he told me he wasn''t a god." Mu thought while still staring into the sky.


    It was getting dark so Mu started on his way back to the inn. When he got there he ordered the balls special and went back to his room.


    Except when he got there he realized it was already open. So Mu said before walking in,"Hey if your here to assassinate someone they are probably down the hall." But when he walked in he saw Sir. Cox-long standing there.


    "If you kill someone and turn back time did you ever kill anybody?" Sir. Cox-long said while staring at the ceiling. "What," "What," they both said looking at each other.


    "Oh nothing and no why would I be here to kill you?" Sir. Cox-long said," I just came to tell you something before the party tomorrow so that your not caught off guard."


    "Well what is it I have to eat these balls before they go cold," Mu said. "It involves the royal family and their current predicament." Sir. Cox-long then went on to explain that currently the royal family is severely inbred and that for the past 3 generations Kings have been marrying their sisters. With the mentality that if they do so it will keep their talents in the family.


    "Now we know that this will cause severe issues in the future leaders, and I know that S-rank bards can influence minds so..." Sir. Cox-long left Mu to finish the sentence,"You want me to make the King and Queen marry someone else?" Mu said thinking he had got it right. "No I want you to make the Princess, King, and Queen see how wrong this all is so that she doesn''t marry her future brother," Sir. Cox-long explained.


    "Alright yea I could do that but I am going to need double the pay because if they find out I will be in deep shit." Mu said trying to get the money back he had spent on his cane. "Ok I''ll pay you triple I don''t care just fix them." Afterwards Sir.Cox-long left, Mu ate his food, and then went to sleep wondering on how he was gonna fix an inbred Royal Family.

 14 Meta Man/ The Long Long legged Princess

    Mu woke up at sunrise because there isn''t any actual clocks in this world and remembered that Sir. Cox-long actually hadn''t given him a time to be at the princesses party by.


    "Ok so it''s a party so it''s probably starting late, meaning I can be there at sunrise and talk to some of the other performers," Mu thought as he walked to the common room.


    Mu was enjoying his usual balls when suddenly a commotion broke out at another table.


    There were two guys fighting and neither seemed to be a hero. So what the hell were they arguing about?


    Well it was pretty obvious since one of them was shouting it to the whole inn. "You dare try to break the law of Meta!!" One of the men shouted and now that Mu looked, this guy had a giant M embroidered into his shirt like a superhero.


    "What the fuck, who are you I was just joking around about how oblivious the hero''s are to how fake this all is!" The normal looking man shouted back.


    "Yes and what if a hero had heard you it would have broken the laws of Meta so I must stop you now evildoer!" The M guy shouted back.


    Needless to say they were both tackled and forced out of the inn. Because apparently the laws of Meta are not real. But not before the guy with the M shouted,"Just know evildoer that it was I Meta man who took you down."


    Actually it was the security of the inn because they both looked like flapping birds not even hitting each other just slapping. But Mu finished his meal after that in relative peace and left for the castle cane in hand.


    All the guards had already been told to expect him so he was let in with little to no checking. Funny enough the same guard who had led him to see Sir. Cox-long had also been assigned to show him to the dining hall. Where he will perform with the other performers.


    There were five other performers in the hall either getting ready or just waiting. The performers include.


    - Twin Jugglers


    -Tight Rope Walker


    -Comedy duo


    -A magician


    -A random handsome guy, Mu doesn''t know what he does


    Mu walked up to the magician wondering why would they need him when they have real magic. "Hey man I got a question," Mu opened up with. "Yea what is it," the magician answered.


    "Why do we need a magician if we have real magic," after Mu said that something in the magician broke. "Haha haha every goddamn time I do a show somebody asks me that question ITS DIFFERENT ITS DIFFERENT!"


    The magician kept shouting that until the guards were forced to apprehend him and kick him out. So now there were four performers.


    ;)due to Mu being an asshole


    "I wasn''t being an asshole I was just genuinely curious." Mu thought back at the voice.


    ;) Oh yea and why do we need singers if there is audio recordings nobody likes being called useless man


    "Well he was probably an asshole anyways right?"


    ;) Probably


    After that incident Mu found a corner to sit in and just hummed tunes to make time go faster(literally).


    Then the time for the party started and servants got done preparing seats right before the nobles walked in. Mu could see this because he was on the grand stage directly left of the door you walk in to get into the dinning hall. Mu didn''t pay much attention to the guest except he did see the Ass family make an appearance.


    Everyone got situated and the royal whatever shouted that the King and Queen were entering. Now you could tell but you also couldn''t tell that they were inbred. You couldn''t tell because the King wore a mask and the Queen had tons of makeup. But you could tell because the King had a limp and one of the Queens tits was lower then the other.


    Then finally the Princess arrived and you could tell that even though her parents were brother and sister. She had gotten super lucky on the genes that decide looks. Except for one very noticeable trait and that was that she had long long legs.

 15 The Obvious Reincarnator / Baron Simp

    Mu was the last performer of the night for the grand finale so he got to watch a lot of the nobles mingle.


    One noble stood out to Mu mainly because he was picking fights with people everywhere. He would walk up to another group of nobles say,"Why are you on my floor!" Then proceed to knock them all out except for one.


    Then he would say,"Your welcome." To the one person he didn''t hit. He did this a total of 3 separate times in the minutes that Mu was watching him.


    But suddenly the guy met his match. He walked up to one noble standing in the corner acting anti-social. It was obvious that this other noble was a reincarnator because he wouldn''t talk to anybody and kept talking to himself saying words like,"system how many points would all these people be.." and such.


    ;)I guess his author must have forgot to put "in his thoughts" after he talks to his system.


    "Probably" Mu thought in his thoughts. But the delinquent noble walked up to the reincarnated noble and asked him,"What are you to good to be here?" Then proceeded to through a fucking flaming punch at the guy.


    The reincarnator obviously caught it and said,"oh another worm for the fishes." Then suddenly thousands of fish surrounded the reincarnator and he shouted,"Oh Great Fisherman System...Feed!"


    ;)What


    "What" everybody said.


    ;)Does this guy have Fishing system


    "It would seem like it." Mu thought back at the voice.


    Then the thousands of fish ,which were "swimming"in the air, all surrounded the noble and ate him.


    What happened after was a series of progressively older and stronger members of the dead nobles family coming out to fight the reincarnator.


    Until finally the dead nobles great-great-great-great grandfather was able to make the reincarnator run away.


    Afterwards, Mu started walking around until he saw something that piqued his interest. He saw a noble in another corner eyeing a bunch of women so he walked up to him.


    "Hey man what are you doing?" Mu asked the noble in the corner. "I''m wondering how much money they would need to eat with me." The noble said before looking at Mu. Mu immediately started backing up and said,"Ok man well you have fun." But before he could the man grabbed onto his arm.


    "Hey wait it''s not weird alright. It''s perfectly healthy I have money they need money, I need company they have company," The noble said. "Ok yea man you just keep doing what you do," Mu said trying to escape from his grasp.


    The noble let go of Mu but not before saying, "Look my name is Baron Simp ok I got a lot of money but the god of fortune didn''t bless me with looks so it''s not weird ok."


    Mu didn''t hear all that though because he had left directly after he had let go and said his name.


    He escaped to the back stage because his turn was coming up.

 16 Fixing the Royal Family/The Princess is A Trap

    1 hour later the random handsome guy had finished his act and it turned out he was actually a stripper. That was kinda surreal for Mu because that was an obviously modern thing for some reason brought into this one.


    ;) Comedy


    "Yeah probably," props to him though because that guy had killed it and would most likely be a tough act to follow for anybody except Mu.


    While walking up the steps Mu was thinking on what type of song to sing to not only entertain the crowd but fix the inbred royal family.


    "Got It," Mu thought right before he stepped onto the stage. "A morally wrong love song," Mu thought thinking that it described the royal family to a T.


    So Mu sang the only morally wrong love song he knew," Benny Mardones-Into The Night". Where the first words are literally.


    "She''s just 16 years old"


    Obviously he changed the content to a more appropriate version where instead of the girl being 16 she is instead your sister.


    Needless to say it worked and the King and Queen both stood up and ran out of the room. Presumably to vomit thinking back on what they did.


    The Princess had a new look whenever she looked at her parents now, disgust. But Mu didn''t want to end it like this because he was being paid to not only fix the royal family but to throw on a show.


    So Mu continued singing influencing the people''s mind with each song causing them to see hallucinations and feel emotions normal music couldn''t.


    For his last song Mu sang, "Norman Greenbaum-Spirit in The Sky" Afterwards he bowed to the crowd like the previous performers.


    Now most of the nobles were to stunned to even blink but one of his fans ambushed him with a hug when he stepped off the stage. The Princess has rushed him with a hug and Mu being a good person hugged back.


    Now this would have been a beautiful moment but Mu felt something when they hugged. Something he honestly shouldn''t have felt on a woman. Something in between her legs.


    ;) Shes got a dick


    "Shut the fuck up!!" Mu was screaming in his thoughts. Needless to say Mu started desperately trying to escape but the Princess was a masculine man.


    "Thank you," the Princess said in a deep ass voice. Then sh.. he pulled Mu in and planted a kiss right on his lips.


    Afterwards Mu in a daze collected his payment and started wandering the street''s aimlessly repeating in his head,"She''s a he."


    Mu collected himself and walked towards the Golden Cord. Once their he brought out his map with a firm plan in his mind.


    "I''m leaving this damn kingdom."

 17 Choosing the Next Kingdom/Your Not a Dragon

    Mu didn''t go to sleep that night knowing he only had a few hours until the Princess sent a knight squad to come get him.


    ;)Can we really call him a princess anymore.


    "I don''t know maybe," Mu thought back at the voice wondering the same question.


    ;)Might as well right that''s what everybody else said.


    "Alright," Mu thought.


    Now while he was having this conversation he brought out his map and started looking at neighboring kingdoms.


    "Do any of these look interesting,"Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)How about that one.


    "What one? you don''t have fingers just tell me the name," Mu thought thinking about how idiotic this voice was.


    ;)The Roaring Dragon Collapsing Star Kingdom it''s probably a cultivation kingdom.


    "Cultivation.. wait they have that here all I''ve seen are classes and systems." Mu thought knowing some world building was coming up.


    ;) Well yea this kingdom uses classes but do you know how big this world is there are thousands of kingdoms, empires, and tribes.


    "Huh, ok but that doesn''t explain the cultivation."Mu thought wanting the voice to get to the point.


    ;)Well this world has multiple forms of energy in it. Chi,experience ,and other shit and every kingdom is built in places where one of these types of energies is most prevalent. That kingdom usually then absorbs that energy either by cultivation to gather chi and shit or by creating classes and killing monsters to get experience and shit.


    "Well, that makes no sense but whatever I''m the one who asked the question."Mu thought wondering on where these different types of energies came from.


    ;) The dreams of children


    "Pedophile," Mu said looking at the map to find the Roaring Dragon Collapsing Star Kingdom.


    It was just one hand away so Mu made his choice to go the the Roaring Dragon Collapsing Star Kingdom.


    He left immediately as to give himself a head-start on the Princess.


    After forgetting to get supplies again Mu robbed another caravan for food and water.


    Two weeks later Mu is traveling through a mountain range between the two kingdoms when the ground starts to shake violently.


    A giant flying snake came up from the ground and roared into the air Mu wasn''t shaken though just thinking,"of course this happens to me."


    After the snake got done screaming into the air it looked at Mu and said,"I am the great dragon Ellupharr''ronbishi how dare you disrupt my slumber you shall now die!!"


    Mu just looked up at him perplexed and asked,"Wait can you say that again?"


    "You shall now die!!" The "dragon" screamed. "No before that," Mu clarified. "I am the great dragon Ellupharr''ronbishi!!" The "dragon said.


    "Your not a dragon."Mu said looking at the "dragon". "Yes I am I''m thousands of years old and can fly," The "dragon" said proudly.


    "So what you don''t have any wings your just a flying snake," Mu said stating what he saw as obvious.


    "Well I''m not a western dragon I''m an eastern dragon," the "dragon" clarified. "That''s not a thing a dragon is a dragon there''s no west or east in it." Mu said reputing his claim.


    "Whatever you''ll be dead anyways so I don''t need to listen to you," the "dragon" said feeling conscious about his looks.


    He did always want wings but he didn''t get those and he was picked on by all the other dragons his entire life he wasn''t gonna let no human do it.

 18 Biology lessons with the Dragon”/The First Town in the New Kingdom

    The Great "Dragon" Ellupharr''ronbishi.


    ;) How do you even say that?


    "I think it''s pronounced like E-lu-far-lon-b-shi and I don''t think it''s a real name." Mu thought back totally not afraid of the giant "dragon" saying it was gonna kill him.


    Mu just sang "STOP!" Really it was more of a scream. The scream-sing worked though because the massive "dragon" suddenly felt like he had just ran into a brick wall and he doesn''t even know what bricks are.


    "Hey that''s kinda rude mister snake we were just having a nice chat." Mu said to the "dragon" which had collapsed at his feet.


    "My name is Ellupharr''ronbishi address me as such human," The "dragon" said. "No, because I can''t pronounce that and neither can anybody else," Mu clarified.


    "Now I want you to tell me why you aren''t just a flying snake,"Mu said genuinely curious about the biology of this creature.


    "Why would I ever talk to you human and reveal my secrets," the "dragon" said growling at him.


    "Well because if you don''t you won''t be able to move ever again and you will be stuck there forever," Mu said pointing out the fact that the "dragon" couldn''t move a muscle except his internal ones. But only because Mu wants them to.


    "Your spell will deteriorate over time or somebody else will break it," the "dragon said closing his eyes to go to sleep.


    "Well if you don''t want to cooperate I''ll just cut you open myself," Mu said walking up to the "dragon".


    "HaHa good luck finding something shar.. AAAAAAHAAHAHAHAH!!" The dragon screamed as Mu took his cane and gave it the "Cell Cutter" effect which raised its sharpness by a astronomical number.


    ;)Cell Cutter is that what your calling it?


    "Well yea because it is so sharp it can cut between cells," Mu thought to the voice as he cut into the "dragon".


    Mu spent a few hours thoroughly cutting the "dragon" up. But Mu is not a biology teacher so he doesn''t actually know what he was looking at while he cut the "dragon" up. But he didn''t find any wings so he decreed that this was absolutely a flying snake not a dragon.


    ;)Snakes don''t have legs.


    "Shut the fuck up you don''t think I know that but I''m not gonna spend another paragraph on this guy alright" Mu thought to the voice.


    So as Mu doesn''t want to stay around the dragon anymore he just takes some of its meat,to see what it taste like, and leaves.


    Afterwards Mu didn''t encounter any real danger. Just a few bandits and an army of the dead but besides that he was out of the mountains in four days.


    He walked up to a sign which was in some language which he knew was on earth but he couldn''t remember its name.


    However,Mu doesn''t need to know the language because he can understand the very essence of words no matter the language. The sign said.


    HEARTBREAK CITY AHEAD

 19 Heartbreak City/Totally-Not-A-God is Heartbroken

    "What the hell kind of name is that," Mu thought.


    ;)Maybe it just has to do with their history or something.


    "Do you think we should just skip this town it sounds like it would be annoying filler," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;) Yea this was probably a back burner idea being used because The Author, hallowed be his name.


    "Amen," Mu thought back at the voice.


    ;) Just hasn''t thought of what he wants done in the Capital.


    "Whatever we''ll buy him a few chapters,"Mu thought as he started walking towards the city.


    It looked like a normal city except for one thing their seemed to be only two emotions in this city love and depression.


    Take for example the guard outside the city he took Mu''s money with a bright ass smile.


    However, after Mu gave his entry fee and started walking away. A girl ran towards the guard and slapped him in the face."Your having other serving girls serve you aren''t you," The girl said while crying.


    "No baby your the only.." the guard stammered out. "Shut it, I saw you order food from Viennese you can''t deny it!" The girl screamed starting to run away. The guard chased after her however screaming,"baby I was just hungry what was I supposed to do."


    But that was the last Mu heard because he was laughing his ass off while walking away.


    Now that one strange occurrence was funny but as Mu walked the streets of the city he saw that almost everybody was exactly like that.


    Sometimes it was the man confronting the girl ,or girl to girl, or man to man, or girl to guy.


    But they all shared one thing in common that was that they were strangely PG.


    There was no girlfriend cheating on boyfriend or anything.


    It was always petty things and they would act like they got betrayed. Like the guard and the serving girl. But they took it so serious and some of them went into really depressed states.


    ;)I guess it is the city of heartbreak


    "No it''s not these are just really petty people acting like they''ve been betrayed for the slightest thing," Mu thought back annoyed that the voice sided with these people.


    ;) You wouldn''t get it you''ve never been in a relationship.


    "Well even so these aren''t relationships that last guy was mad that his mailman delivered letters to other people,"Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)you have such a cold heart.


    "You don''t have a heart," Mu elaborated.


    ;)and yet I feel more than you what does that say.


    "That you''ve gone insane," Mu thought.


    Wading through all the people being "betrayed" and "heartbroken". Mu finally arrived in front of a place with a sign saying "Heartbreak Inn".


    Mu walked in and saw basically the same thing that he saw outside inside. Mu walked up to the bartender who was also crying. "Hey I would like a.." but before Mu could finish talking the bartender looked up and screamed," I am loyal to my woman and I only give rooms to her!!"


    Mu was shocked until he heard a woman scream "I can help you down here!" Mu looked over and saw a female bartender serving no one. "Hey yea I''m looking for a room," Mu said as he walked over to her. "And hey what''s wrong with all the people here?"Mu asked the bartender.


    "Oh yea this city was cursed a while back by a witch to always experience heartache. But she was a very PG person so she made it to where very petty things made people just break down like their dad killed their dog or something."


    "Well why aren''t you or I affected?" Mu wondered.


    The bartender said"Well you have to stay in the city for two consecutive days before you start getting affected, so I make an effort to always leave and restart the timer every day and a half."


    "Oh alright," Mu said then he ordered a room and a meal. As he was walking up to his room however he heard a cry louder then any other.


    "WHYYYY how could you give anyone else a room Mary." Then suddenly a man appeared out of nowhere and who is it but John Totally-Not-A-God.


    "Again John I''m not your bartender alright I have to serve other people," the bartender who just served Mu said to John.


    Then John looked at Mu with hate in his eyes," I''ll have you know that I''m a god alright and you have just made a powerful enemy," John then started running at Mu.


    Mu wasn''t scared however since he knew he could defeat a god. So Mu used the same trick as he did with the flying snake and stopped John Totally-A-God.


    Mu knew just what to do with him so he carried him out of the city and set a timer of two hours until the "STOP" wears off.


    Then Mu walked back to Heartbreak Inn resolute that he was leaving tomorrow for the Capital no matter how ready The Author is.

 20 Was it A Meta Joke or Just Laziness/Joining a Sect Cul

    "Ohh shit,how long have I been out?"Mu thought.


    ;)Two days


    "What but no that can''t be right I progress the story everyday and I can''t be here for more than a day and a half." Mu thought worried about the curse.


    ;)Well it was either a really meta joke by The Author since you said you were leaving tomorrow two days ago. Or you were more sleepy than you thought.


    "I have been sleeping on the ground." Mu thought to the voice completely forgetting the curse.


    ;)Oh yea and the curse can''t effect you.


    "Huh why not," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Well unless it has equal or greater singing progress than you it can''t effect you.


    "But wouldn''t that mean that whoever placed this curse was a god?" Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Most likely since it affected John.


    Even though Mu didn''t hold up his promise to himself he made up for it by leaving right after eating.


    In fact he left so fast that he had forgotten to get supplies again. So after Mu robbed his third caravan he had enough supplies to last him all the way to the Capital of the Roaring Dragon Collapsing Star Kingdom.


    After Mu crested the last hill he could see the Capital which was apparently situated directly on a mountain. In fact the entire Capital was actually just one humongous sect.


    Mu walked up to the huge imposing gates.


    ;) After waiting in line for like an hour.


    "Yea but nobody wants to hear about that though it was boring," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)You saw a guy get his anus pushed out of his body by a slap.


    "Yea so what," Mu thought to the voice.


    "Name?" The guard asked Mu.


    "Mu Sic,"Mu responded.


    ;)oh my god just go invisible and sneak passed him.


    "That would be immoral," Mu thought to the voice while answering the "standard" questions. (If you can''t remember them see chapter "I can''t remember either").


    Right before gaining admission to the city however Mu had to go through one more question than normal.


    "Will you join our sect?" The guard asked monotone. "What, can I not?" Mu answered the question with another question.


    "I mean if you don''t wanna come into the Capital then sure." The guard said unholstering his spear.


    "Umm ok then sure I''ll join your sect but can I leave whenever I want too?" Mu asked.


    "Suuuuuurrreeee," the guard said sarcastically grapping Mu and throwing him into the Capital.


    ;) Did you just join a cult


    "No I joined a sect," Mu answered sincerely hoping he didn''t just join a cult.


    ;)What''s the difference between them.


    "Well one is for religion and one is for fighting," Mu answered starting to regret his choice in coming here.


    ;)Doesn''t mean it''s not a cult.


    "Shut it I once accidentally joined a cult before I''m not doing it again!"Mu screamed at the voice (in his thoughts).


    ;)I don''t remember that chapter.


    "Well yea it was from when I was on earth," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)oh well nobody cares about that.


    "I have a backstory too," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;) And I care why?


    "Dick," Mu thought.

 21 Possible Schizophrenic Cultivator/Signing Up For The Qualification Rounds

    "Now if what I know about sects."


    ;)Cults.


    "Is true then there should be outer disciples inner disciples and a patriarch or something right."Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Your the resident expert on this cult shit.


    "I''m not the resident expert I was only in a cult for like two months before I escaped,"Mu thought.


    ;)Yeaaa but you were still in one.


    "Whatever, hey isn''t this like the fourth flower garden we''ve passed?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)Fourteenth actually some of them were really well hidden.


    "Who the hell is making these things?"Mu thought to himself.


    ;)Probably another cultist.


    "I thought that to myself you omnipotent thought pervert." Mu thought to the voice.


    Mu kept following all of the gardens ,because he wanted to know where they led. Until finally he saw a woman planting flowers and growing them using Qi or whatever energy she practices.


    "Excuse me miss are you the one making all these unnecessary eye sores," Mu said looking at the beautiful flower gardens around him.


    "Ahh a real human!!" The woman screamed after she looked up and saw Mu.


    "Ummm first off rude, and second how did you get here only my friends know how to get here," The woman said looking around her crazily.


    "I just followed all of the flowers you planted uhh why did you do that?" Mu said pressing his issue.


    "Well I made them for my friends I''m nearly done with my last one so can you leave," the woman then started using her hands to signal to him that he should leave.


    "Oh ok then bye," Mu then started walking away but he wasn''t fast enough, and he started hearing the woman talk to someone.


    Except when Mu turned around there was no one there for her to talk too she was just talking to air.


    "Hey who are you talking to?" Mu asked the woman.


    "My friend Geoff," the woman told Mu while still talking to "Geoff".


    "Uhh I don''t even know how she spells it but I can just tell it''s the annoying one with the G," Mu thought.


    "There''s nobody there miss," Mu said. "Well sure there is, Geoff and Suzy are both here they are not invisible you should be able to see them." The woman said in a sarcastic way.


    ;) Uhh Mu can I talk to you for a sec.


    "Yea what." Mu thought zoning out from his conversation with the woman.


    ;) I think this woman has a mental illness specifically schizophrenia.


    "That wouldn''t be in a fantasy world," Mu thought back.


    ;)Why wouldn''t it... but look that''s not the point umm you know this is a comedy right.


    "Yea what of it," Mu thought wondering where the voice was going with this.


    ;)Well since it is a comedy you will inevitably make a joke about this woman''s situation if you hang around her for any longer.


    "Oh well that wouldn''t be any good that would weigh on my conscious." Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Yea so I say we just leave this whole scenario.


    "Well we can''t not help her." Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)I mean yea but like do it fast you never know when your gonna make a sarcastic or dark joke about this.


    So Mu healed the possibly mentally ill woman. But rest assured she wasn''t schizophrenic she was just being haunted by dozens of ghost and being forced to make flower gardens her entire life.


    The next interesting place Mu stumbles upon by just walking around was a place very nearly resembling a gladiators arena.


    There was a man up front screaming,"Sign up for the Qualification rounds of the Gladiator of the Year Tournament here." This was followed by a bunch of fanfare.


    ;)might as well right.


    "I''m no gladiator," Mu thought to the voice before he started walking away.


    "The Winner gets to ask for any one thing from the patriarch himself," the announcer yelled out right before Mu left the area.


    ;)why does this always happen like right before you leave.


    "I don''t know but I''m in and I''m gonna win this tournament."


    And so starts the tournament "Arch" (really it will be just like 3 chapters or something probably)

 22 The Old Man/Cliffhanger

    Mu walked up to the man yelling and told him he wanted to sign up for the tournament.


    Mu was told that in order to sign up for the tournament he has to pay 2 gold and sign a few contracts which state.


    "If you die" yada yada "We can''t be held responsible for any inhuman torture done towards you" yada yada.


    Afterwards Mu was led to a room where the combatants waited, trained, prepared, cultivated, and sacrificed souls to gain strength you know the usual.


    There was one man who stuck out to Mu however since he was really old and just sitting in a corner.


    Mu walked up to him and said,"Hey old man what are you doing here?" The old man looked up at Mu like he had seen him thousand times


    "I was sent here to be the old man who a hero grows to like and then dies to a villain. Then the said hero will go bat shit insane and kill all the other people in the ring who he fights." The old man said in a raspy voice.


    "So what your hate bait or something?" Mu asked the old man.


    "Yea I guess you could call it that, but I also give out information about the tournament to novices." The old man closed his eyes about to go to sleep waiting for said hero to wake him up.


    "Oh really do you think you could teach me a little about this place," Mu asked the old man.


    "You''re not the hero but sure I''ll tell you a little bit but make sure you don''t grow too attached to me I am going to die." The old man said to Mu not even opening his eyes.


    ;)To bad this guy is gonna die


    "Yea too bad he has to die," Mu thought back to the voice.


    "Umm if I had to tell you one thing it would be that every single person in this colosseum has a secret technique," the old man told this to Mu right before going to sleep.


    "Hey old man what is that supposed to mean?" Mu kept asking the old man and shaking him but the guy was out.


    ;)I guess it means that every single person has a secret technique.


    "Yea I guess so...hey wait that''s exactly what he just said how does that help me?" Mu thought to the voice while walking away from the old mans body.


    Mu looked back at the old man right before he was told that it was his turn to line up and saw the old man talking to a female with very cold eyes.


    ;)hey it''s a female hero


    "I think they are called heroins." Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)haha heroin


    Mu was walking towards his first fight in the qualification rounds when suddenly he realized that they were just gathering people in the arena.


    ;)it''s not gonna be a battle royal right


    "Probably." Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)that is so lazy.


    "Well I mean would you wanna describe an entire 1V1 fighting tournament with hundreds of combatants?" Mu thought to the voice


    ;)You could do time skips


    It didn''t matter how much the voice hated battle royals however.


    Since the colosseum has decided to hold one so that they only have to show the best 50 fighters fight 1V1.


    Mu was told to stand on one side of the arena which had a bunch of people wearing red. Mu was handed a red vest as well right before he walked in and told the rules of the battle royal.


    Rules of Dragon Colosseum Battle Royal


    1.There are two teams of hundred people, Red vs Gold, they will fight each other until only 50 people remain.


    2.No team killing, unless the person you kill has killed your family and you can''t work with them.


    3.Make it entertaining.


    ;)Is this really a battle royal I mean there are teams.


    "I mean it must be easier to watch one big fight between two teams then watching hundreds of small fights." Mu thought to the voice twirling his cane while waiting for the fight to start.


    ;)More like easier to write about


    Before Mu knew it a bell rang out on the battle field and the two sides started charging at each other.

 23 The Invisible” Man/Never Trust Free Things

    As the two teams ran at each other spells were cast, talismans were used, spirits were called down, and many more theatrical things.


    But Mu just leaned against the colosseum wall which in his words is him "looking cool".


    ;)Get out there and fight


    "No why would I do that it''s their fault if they don''t see me and I get to coast to victory."Mu thought to the voice while watching the fight.


    Mu was looking up and down his wall when he saw another red doing the same thing as him.


    Mu walked over to the man and greeted him the man looked at Mu in utter shock and terror. Like he had just punt kicked a puppy into a field goal.


    "Y..yo..you can see me," the man asked Mu in a quite voice. "Yea your not invisible," Mu answered the man.


    "Bu..but I''m supposed to be he,he said it would work,he took all of my money."the man slumped onto the ground.


    ;)hey maybe we should pretend he''s invisible


    "Why," Mu asked the voice.


    ;)so that he doesn''t become depressed in the middle of a fight and die.


    "Well I don''t see how us pretending he''s invisible will help him be happy he already knows he got scammed," Mu told the voice.


    ;)just do it


    "Alright,"Mu said getting his acting ability ready.


    "Oh My God Where did he go!!" Mu screamed. The man looked up at Mu like a lost puppy.


    "Are you being serious?" The man asked Mu.


    "Where did that voice come from!!"Mu jumped. After Mu had convinced the man he was invisible however his true colors came out. A wide smile stretched across the man''s face.


    "I''m a ghost here to tell you that nobody loves you, and you''ll die alone." The man kept spouting insults at Mu.


    "We shouldn''t have done this," Mu told the voice.


    ;)Yea I see that now he''s a dick


    "What do I say Mu is always right that''s one me zero you." Mu told the voice.


    ;)what''s the current score again


    "1,234,543 to 2,345,675," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Yea I''m still ahead


    "Fuck you," Mu then zoned in on the man laughing and throwing insults at him.


    "I can see you asshole," Mu said pointing at the man so that he knows he''s not joking.


    "Ah..what so I was visible this whole time," the man then started having a breakdown screaming," All my money!" Or "I had to pull the plug on my mother to get this!"


    He got his wish however since after he started crying everybody did treat him like he was invisible.


    Mu walked back to his wall and leaned against it and started twirling his cane.


    The match kept going until the overseers could only see 50 people in the arena. The bell was rung again and everyone was told to gather in a line.


    The hype man jumped into the arena and started taking the names of the 50 people and shouting them out to the crowd.


    Mu and the competitors were led to a dark room outside the arena where there was free food and drinks for them all.


    Mu ate and drank with them until suddenly they started dropping onto the ground.


    ;)the food and drinks were drugged.


    "Why would.." but that all Mu was able to think before he also hit the ground.

 24 The Ramblings of Mu/600 Words

    While he was drugged Mu could still talk to the voice but he was a bit off.


    "Hey have you ever had to shit so hard that your balls hurt," Mu then started laughing.


    ;) I don''t have a body Mu you know that.


    "Ohh I''m so sorry man.."Mu started crying hysterically and the abyss started recording their conversation.


    "I''m always so mean to you man but I''ve never had a brother and your the closest I''ve ever got," Mu then threw his imaginary arms over the abyss.


    They both started crying while saying,"bro." They did this for a whole minute.


    Now Mu said a lot while he was under the influence but here are the highlights.


    Mu''s Highlights


    1. Is water the earths blood.


    2.What if a toy maker made a toy that made a toy maker.


    3.If lights have electricity in them why do I have to pay taxes.


    4.if a wall gets torn down but nobody is around who tore down the wall.


    And many more.


    Mu woke up on grass still reeling from his drugging but he felt a piece of paper laying on his chest.


    Mu just laid there for a minute trying to get rid of his headache not bothering to read the piece of paper.


    10 minutes later


    Mu is still laying on the ground not wanting to get up.


    20 minutes later


    Is he dead


    30 minutes later


    ;)WAKE THE FUCK UP!!!!


    "I''m up mom I''m ready for school!!" Mu shouted to the forest around him.


    ;)Continue the fucking story this will be at least 600 words long.


    "Uhh shut it I''m up...what does this piece of paper say?" Mu thought to the voice.


    Second Round of the Tournament Rules.


    1.In 40 minutes walk north for 250 meters


    2. You will be fighting in this pocket dimension so as not to cause catastrophic damages to the colosseum.


    3.No teaming everyone you meet is your enemy.


    "So how long was I out since I got to this forest?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)umm actually it''s a pocket dimension not a forest and about thirty minutes.


    "Umm actually it is a forest that is just in a pocket dimension, and what do you want to do for the 10 minutes we got left?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;) umm actually... yea your right and I don''t know start a forest fire


    "We are not starting a forest fire." Mu told the voice.


    ;)Well it would be the fastest way to win.


    "But it is immoral," Mu defended his point.


    They spent exactly 10 minutes arguing over this trivial matter before the voice told Mu it was time to go.


    "How am I supposed to know when I travel 250 meters, also which way is north isn''t this a pocket dimension does it have poles?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)I don''t know I guess something will happen when you travel 250 meter and just look at the moss doesn''t it grow facing north.


    "I guess," Mu thought back to the voice.


    This absurdity worked however since Mu was traveling straight towards his first fight.


    ;)we still haven''t reached 600 words you describe the fucking fight now.


    What the abyss didn''t know is that he is simply helping me make filler so that I don''t have to describe the fight.


    ;)no I''m not.


    In fact he is.


    ;)If you don''t want to describe the fight until next chapter just don''t what is with all of this filler.


    What the abyss didn''t know is that we have reached 600 words see you next chapter


    ;)You bastard!!

 25 The Code/Highest Honor

    When Mu ,presumably, walked 250 meters he ran into a clearing where another man was waiting on him.


    They both walked to the middle of the field to exchange greetings before they fought.


    "Hello I''m Mu Sic who are you," Mu opened up with.


    "Ah no I''m supposed to go first and then you tell me your name...alright let''s start over," the man said.


    "Why do we need to do that just tell me your name," Mu said to the man.


    "You are breaking my code which I live by I must introduce myself first," the man said punching his chest.


    "That''s redundant you already know my name," Mu said to the man.


    "Just start over alright... Hi I am Sir. Yintall Lightning and who are you peasant?" Sir. Yintall said.


    "Did you just call me a peasant that''s not cool dick," After Mu said this the mans eyes went wide.


    "Did..did you just CURSE AT ME!" Sir. Yintall screamed at Mu before pulling out his sword and running at Mu screaming his lungs out.


    Mu''s first real tournament fight had just begun.


    "Fucking finally" Mu and the abyss said at the same time.


    But it was over quicker than it had begun. Before Sir.Yintall could bring down his flaming sword of PG goodness Mu had smacked his cane onto the ground.


    The ground opened up under Sir.Yintall and he was swallowed up to his neck in dirt; his arm with the sword was still out though since he had it above his head.


    Sir.Yintall struggled against the weight of the pocket dimension earth. But he couldn''t move any of his stuck body parts and his lungs were slowly starting to collapse.


    Mu saw this and released some of the pressure on him so he doesn''t die but is instead just stuck in the ground for the rest of this round.


    ;)Did that paper say we had to kill people or subdue them


    "Uhh it didn''t say anything like that so I''m just guessing that we don''t have to kill him." Mu thought to the voice.


    "Kill Me!" Sir.Yintall screamed closing his eyes," let me keep some of my honor instead of living with this shame!"


    "Yea I''m not gonna do that," Mu told Sir.Yintall before starting to walk away from him.


    "WAIT!" Sir.Yintall screamed at Mu.


    Mu turned around looking at the man stuck in the ground.


    "What is your highest honor peasant?" Sir.Yintall questioned Mu.


    "First off stop with the peasant shit. Second off probably having my story plagiarized and sold on Amazon under a different name like Walk of the Musician or some shit."


    "Ahh just as I expected you have no honor," Sir. Yintall then closed his eyes and went to sleep.


    "Fuck you I have plenty of honor," Mu told Sir. Yintall.


    ;)No you don''t.


    "Fuck you too," Mu thought to the voice.


    Mu then turned around and started wandering the forest looking for some place to sleep and people to rob food off of.

 26 Third Round/The Old Man Dies

    ;)Hey I''ve got a question.


    "What is it," Mu thought while he was wandering around the forest.


    ;)There were 50 people in the second round right.


    "Yea,ahh fucking bitch!" Mu thought to the voice as he got smacked in the face by a tree.


    ;)So 50 people that''s 25 losers and 25 winners right.


    "Yea did you figure that one all by yourself," Mu thought to the voice wondering how much education the abyss actually had.


    ;)No I mean that this round should be over pretty quick if all the fights are like yours.


    3 months later


    Mu was sitting in his treetop mansion with his new monkey family.


    ;)How the fuck did we get here.


    "Comedic time skip, you just had to fucking jinx it." Mu thought to the voice scratching his beard.


    ;)I''m sorry I forgot the number one rule. That The Author hollowed be his name is an asshole.


    But before the conversation could continue a loud explosion came from the sky signifying the end of the round.


    Mu broke down crying and started hugging his monkey brothers and sisters.


    The monkeys gathered around Mu wondering what was going on and when he started disintegrating into the sky they went bat shit insane.


    Mu reappeared in the middle of the colosseum and started kissing the ground.


    None of the other competitors looked as bad as Mu since they were cultivators who could survive solely off whatever energy they use.


    Mu was asked by the referee if he could continue fighting and then the hype man.


    (A/N if anyone could tell me the name of the person who announces shit that would be great otherwise I''m just gonna keep calling him "the hype man" and I know that''s not right)came out to announce the competitors still standing and the rules for the next round.


    "Since there is 25 of you left 1 of you will be allowed to sit out this round to have an even number for the last round."The hype man shouted to the crowed.


    "They don''t know how to do math do they," Mu thought to the voice as a hat was brought to the hype man with their names on it.


    ;)what do you mean?


    "24 divided by 2 is 12 plus the person who got to sit out that makes it 13 and that''s not even," Mu thought to the voice as he hummed a tune to increase his luck.


    "Mu Sic gets to sit out this round you lucky dog!" the hype man shouted out.


    Mu was led to the stands while him and the abyss kept arguing about the amount of people who will be left in the final round.


    In fact they argued for so long that they missed the entire rules for the third round.


    But one thing caught Mu''s attention.


    "Hey that old man just died."


    ;) Another one really you could at least explain what he died of.


    The old man had died of a heart attack by eating to much food.


    ;)How, why, what?


    The abyss and Mu didn''t hear the third rounds rules so they didn''t know how the old man got enough food to die of a heart attack.


    ;)Come on.


    We have reached 500 words I guess they will learn it next chapter.

 27 It Was A What/Mu The Villian

    Mu focused back on the Third Round after the old man died and saw something which he never would have expected.


    All of the competitors were shoveling down food as the crowd cheered. This was no ordinary food however there were whole dragons, phoenixes, and other mythic beast.


    Mu was shocked to the core and just to certify that what he was seeing was real he turned to the person next to him and asked him what was going on.


    The person looked at Mu and screamed," EATING COMPETITION!!"


    "Yea that''s what I thought." Mu said sitting back in his chair and shaking his head at the absurdity of this tournament.


    ;)What did you think would happen?


    "A fight," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)That gets boring after 2 rounds you gotta have 1 wild card round to entice the crowd.


    "They could have built an obstacle course," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)That''s too sane.


    No matter how much Mu thought it was insane it worked competitors were falling out left and right and the crowd loved it.


    They either died from eating something poisonous or passed out because of exhaustion. There were 11 people left standing at the end of the round adding Mu that makes it 12.


    ;)Point Abyss


    "Fucking shit how was I supposed to know that they would get rid of 13 people half is how all the other round were." Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)They did say that they would have an even amount of competitors for the final round.


    "We''re not doing this again," Mu thought to the voice focusing on the 11 people left standing.


    Mu was sweeping his eyes across the competitors when he noticed one of them was staring right at him.


    It was the heroin.


    ;)Hah heroin.


    Who was talking to the old man before the tournament and she was looking at Mu with hate in her eyes.


    "Hey she doesn''t think I''m responsible for the old mans death right," Mu thought to the voice as the light around Mu darkened and what looked like a spot light shined down on him.


    ;)Ohh shit your the villain.


    "Wait what I''m not a villain I didn''t kill the old man," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Yea but she''s blaming you and she''s a heroin that makes you the villain you even have the villain lighting.


    "No I''m not a villain this is just the lighting, and how is it even doing that this is an open air colosseum you would have to manipulate the sun to do this."Mu thought to the voice waving his hands at the sky.


    ;)Hey your a villain now so you might as well just go with the role.


    So that''s what Mu decided to do.


    He looked down at the heroin and smirked and puffed out his chest.


    The heroin just kept looking now wondering why this villain was pretending to be a chicken.


    ;)Yea your gonna need some more work on your villain pose.


    "I thought it was good," Mu thought to the voice while he watched the heroin be led out of the colosseum for the next round.

 28 Wiping out the Competition/Time to Set Sail

    ;)Do you think it''s fair to all the other competitors.


    "Is what fair to the competitors," Mu thought back as he heard the rules of the fourth round.


    Rules


    1.No Rules


    2.Its a free-for-all


    "Doesn''t that mean there is one rule," Mu thought to himself.


    ;)Do you think it''s fair that everyone else has to fight physically while you just stomp your foot and their knocked out.


    "Well no it''s not but I''m not a warrior why would I fight physically?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)let me rephrase it umm it''s not exciting I mean I get it it''s easy but I wanna see blood not an anticlimactic fight again.


    "I mean I could pretend to be a warrior," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Yea just give yourself some effects like Immortality and then go out there and fight.


    So as all the competitors went to their area for the free-for-all Mu gave himself the following effects.


    Effect-Time


    Immortality-2:34:05


    Super Strength-2:00:00


    Super Speed-2:00:00


    ;)Yea like that, but why did you put timers on them.


    "Well I don''t wanna be like this forever," Mu thought to the voice as he felt power rush into his veins which was disorienting.


    The Hype Man raised his hand from the stands and counted down from 10..9..8..7..6..5..4..3..2..1..0


    Right as he reached zero Mu turned towards the person next to him and kicked towards them.


    Mu caught them off guard with his super speed and was able to send a flying knee straight to their jaw breaking a few teeth and knocking them out.


    "This is kinda exciting," Mu thought to the voice as he went toe to toe with more competitors.


    While Mu was doing wrestling moves on the other competitors a certain heroin was also mowing her way through the competition.


    As Mu knocked out his last man he turned around to look for another fighter but all he saw was the heroin killing her last fighter.


    "Wow you call me a monster you just killed that man," Mu said to the heroin.


    She just growled at Mu and started stomping towards him.


    Mu was about to run at her and pile driver her (that sounded wrong) when the voice gave Mu a suggestion on how he could just fuck with the heroin.


    Mu gave himself the pain immunity effect and started walking towards the heroin.


    Mu stopped and said," Hoh your approaching me."


    ;)Really your just gonna do that.


    "What," Mu thought to the voice as he had never watched JoJo before.


    ;)Never mind.


    "So I just let her stab me right,"Mu said resolving himself.


    ;)Yea then you pull the sword into you and whisper something into her ear.


    But before they could talk anymore it was showtime the heroin pulled out her sword and ran at Mu.


    She impaled him and screamed, "FOR THE OLD MAN I NEVER KNEW THE NAME OF!!"


    Mu didn''t have to pull the sword in as she had already pushed it to the hilt. Mu just smirked and leaned in.


    ;)What did he say.


    "Pizzas are 25% off if you go to the website," Mu then used his power to knock her out.


    The crowd started screaming in excitement as Mu pulled the sword out of his chest.


    ;)Hey what is that on the sword.


    "Huh," Mu said as he looked at the sword. What he saw impaled on the top was his heart. People in the crowd started vomiting as Mu grabbed it and shoved it back into his chest.


    People got to see the massive hole in his chest seal itself up and Mu looked no worse for wear.


    The Hype Man came up to Mu and asked his name. After Mu told him the hype man turned towards the crowd lifted up Mu''s arm and yelled," MU THE UNKILLABLE."


    The clouds in the sky parted after that and a man in a golden ray of light came down and said," Hello champion I am the patriarch tell me what you wish from me."


    ;)Didn''t you say you had some big plan to accelerate us into another arc.


    "Yea I do," Mu thought to the voice right before asking the patriarch for.


    "I want a self-sailing ship one that needs no crew."


    ;)You wanna go to the sea.


    "Yea we''ve been on land enough and I looked at the map we bought and it has an X over an island which is way out in the sea there must be treasure there," Mu thought to the voice.


    "Are you sure?" The patriarch asked.


    "Yes," Mu said shaking his head as well.


    "Ok it is yours, it is at the port city Cathadee" the patriarch said then disappeared probably to go back to his mountain or some shit.


    A week later in Cathadee.


    ;)is this our boat


    Mu looked up at a behemoth of a ship with cannons and shit.


    The dock master looked up and recognized Mu from a drawing he had been given and walked over to him.


    "Hello Mr.Sic if you could follow me I will lead you to you ship." The dock master then led Mu away from the behemoth ship and towards a little dingy which could only be called a ship because it had a sail.


    "Your one man crew vessel is here m''lord." The dock master then walked away.


    "Oh these bastards,"Mu thought.


    ;)Could you just fix it with effects.


    "It''s an inanimate object," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)So


    "Well I''ve never tried to give effects to inanimate objects," Mu then tried to give the dingy the unsinkable effect.


    ;)Did it work.


    "One way to find out," Mu thought to the voice as he jumped onto the dingy and tried to flip it. But luckily it worked Mu can give effects to inanimate objects.


    ;)it''s called enchanting just call it enchanting.


    "I think I want to be a pirate now and sink these assholes ships." Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Alright but we have to set sail first.


    So Mu started his oceanic adventures in his dingy.

 29 Becoming a Pirate/Mu’s Weird Tastes

    ;)So we''re becoming pirates right.


    "That''s right and we''re gonna find treasure, sink ships, and nothing else that real pirates did." Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)So what are we semi-pirates we only do the good bad things instead of the bad bad things.


    "Well yea I don''t really want to pillage lands, steal woman, and kill families do you." Mu asked the voice.


    ;)No but I mean are we really pirates then.


    "Yes now if you would kindly shut up I''m gonna make myself something to eat." Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)With what food.


    "The food that I bought I mean I can''t just keep robbing people because I forgot to get food." Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Where is it.


    "Haha of course I know where it is it''s at the inn..." Mu thought to the voice realizing that he again forgot to get food.


    "Well we''re not that far out," Mu thought looking back and seeing no land.


    ;)You just had to give the boat super-speed


    "Well it''s fun.. and fast." Mu stammered.


    ;)Well let''s turn around and go back to land.


    "One problem with that," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)What


    "I didn''t bring navigation tools and I don''t really know the cardinal directions." Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)So what your saying is..


    "WE''RE FUCKING LOST!!" Mu screamed into the air.


    So Mu spent the next 3 hours having a panic attack and traveling the sea looking for people to rob.


    Luckily he found a merchant ship to rob of all of the food Mu would need to survive for two months or more.


    Mu even found some navigation tools including a compass and a sextant which Mu doesn''t know how to use but damn does it look cool.


    So even though some of the people aboard that ship would most likely die of starvation in a few weeks Mu had supplies.


    As Mu was sailing away from the ship he started cooking eggs on his.


    ;)how is there a fire on your ship.


    "I made the ship fire-proof,"Mu said to the voice.


    ;)You made the ship which is on water fire-proof


    "Yea," Mu said to the voice.


    ;)Can''t fight that logic.


    Mu finished his eggs and started making a "sauce".


    ;)What are you making now.


    "Ketchup," Mu said to the voice.


    ;)Huh what why and how do you know how to make ketchup.


    "Why wouldn''t I know how to make ketchup I love ketchup, and it''s for the eggs." Mu said to the voice.


    ;)Ketchup for the eggs...you fucking disgust me.


    "Hey fuck you it''s good don''t knock it till you try it..oh wait you can''t."


    ;)Hey not cool man.


    "Don''t talk about my ketchup that way," Mu said to the voice while finishing the ketchup and adding it to his eggs to eat.

 30 Fishing/Sea Monster Insides

    Three weeks at Sea


    ;)God this is boring.


    "Yea I should have gotten a crew," Mu said while enchanting his cane.


    ;)What are you doing.


    "I wanna fish so I gave it the ability to make a line of energy out of its top," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Why you can''t eat any of it you don''t know what the aquatic life of this world is like.


    "I''m not gonna eat them I''m gonna study them," Mu said to the voice.


    ;)Your gonna study them with what I mean didn''t you try the same thing with that flying snake and you didn''t find shit.


    "I found out that he didn''t have wings so Uhh I think I''m qualified to study fish," Mu thought to the voice casting out his line.


    ;)Do you know how long it will most likely take for a fish to bite you have no bait on there.


    "No I don''t have any bait but..I put another enchantment on my cane," Mu said to the voice while gearing up for his first catch.


    ;)Oh and what enchantment is that.


    "I put the "alluring" enchantment on it no fish will be able to not bite." But Mu stopped talking to the voice because his line was moving.


    The line kept teasing Mu until it suddenly yanked away from him and Mu fought to keep hold of it.


    ;)Give yourself more strength.


    "Yea alright.." Mu thought straining until he gave himself the super strength trait.


    Mu gave one heaving yank and a fucking mountain of a fish went flying into the air.


    Mu looked up shocked as the mountain was coming at him with its mouth open.


    ;)It''s gonna fucking swallow us.


    "No you bastard it''s just gonna swallow me!" Mu screamed to the voice.


    The fish mountain fell right on Mu with its mouth open swallowing him whole.


    The water was so turbulent that Mu just closed his eyes and hugged his indestructible ship.


    Next thing Mu knew he was washed up in the stomach of the mountain fish and when he looked up he saw...a modern city skyline.


    ;)Excuse me.


    "Uhm who made this," Mu said to no one in particular.


    "Well hello sir we did," A voice said behind Mu.


    "Oh hello do you know the way out," Mu said as he turned around and saw a creature.


    It had three faces on each side of its head and one mouth it was very short though.


    But the most horrifying part was that their were thousands of them all gathering together around Mu with what he could only describe as hunger.

 31 Some Things You Don’t Have to Describe/Mu’s Sit Down

    ;)What the fuck are these things.


    "I don''t know but I''m scared," Mu said licking the sea salt off his lips.


    ;)What are you hungry you want to eat them, why the fuck are you licking your lips.


    "Because they''re chapped," Mu said furiously giving his lips some tongue.


    ;)Stop that it''s weird even the fucking mutants are getting creeped out.


    "I''m trying to get them to accept me," Mu thought to the voice not stopping his voracious tongue movement on his lips.


    ;)Don''t use those words.


    "What it''s what I''m doing," Mu said while juggling his saliva across his lips.


    ;)Goddamnit there is just some things you don''t describe look you scared away the mutants with your words.


    "Oh I guess I''ll stop then," Mu said resting his tongue back into it''s wet lair called the mouth.


    ;)What are you doing know.


    "Flexing my tongue it''s sore," Mu said while pulsating his tongue from stiff to soft.


    ;)STOP.


    "Is the tongue a muscle," Mu asked the voice.


    ;)W..what.


    In another part of the universe another Mu was sitting down beside a fire with a monocle in his eye.


    "Hahaha I''m not Mu, Author I am simply a forgotten segment or some shit being used here to talk about something." The Not Mu said.


    The Not Mu got a book from a shelf and looked directly at the Author watching him.


    "It has come to my attention that a certain website on which our book is published has made a new writing prompt competition." The Not Mu said while opening the book he got out.


    "It is titled "Writing Prompts Contest 116: Male Lead - Entertainer in Another World", now this in itself is not the coolest part. The best part is in the ideas section where it says,"1) A former world-class singer wakes up in a world filled with fantastical beings and magic. They soon find out that their voice and songs are magical in nature in this new world where bards exist. How will they make use of this? How will this world respond to their power?"Not Mu said and after he was done he closed up the book and looked right at the readers.


    "Now I don''t know if you''ve read the story up to this point but I mean...come on. I''m not mad website on which this story is published in fact I just want to know who on your staff likes my story because that is badass." Not Mu said.


    "I don''t know if this is normal or not but it''s definitely cool," Not Mu stood up and ripped off his mask revealing himself to be the Author.


    "I didn''t want to make myself a body in this world because I didn''t want Mu to be able to meet me, but I had to come down and say thank you I have had this story bumping around in my head for years and I just had to write it I didn''t expect 10,000 people to find this concept as interesting as me." I wiped a tear away from my eye and said," This may not sound like a lot to some people but that''s more people then I have in my city (I think). So thank you." Author signing out.


    ;)God I hope that''s the last one of those.


    Fuck You.

 32 To Kill Or Not To Kill/Illegal Activity Island

    ;)Alright so how are we going to kill them.


    "What why would I kill them I''m just gonna leave," Mu said to the voice while shrinking his ship so that he can carry it.


    ;)What but they could have treasure or ancient artifacts.


    "So that makes it ok for me to murder an entire civilization," Mu asked the voice.


    ;)Well no but they are probably evil they did look like they were gonna eat you until the tongue thing.


    "But they didn''t and they most likely don''t even know what evil is I mean humans invented that concept," Mu said while hiking up the sea monster innards.


    ;)Humans didn''t invent good and evil they just gave names to it.


    "Well even so I''m not gonna kill an entire civilization and steal their shit," Mu said to the voice.


    ;)Your ancestors would be disappointed.


    "Fuck you," Mu said as he finally saw the teeth of the beast.


    ;)How deep under water do you think we are.


    "Ohh shit your right pressure umm I''ll just put a bubble around the ship." Mu said as he took the ship out of his pocket and grew it back to its original size.


    ;)so do we just pry the teeth open.


    "No that would let in a rush of water and we would be back where we started," Mu said as he looked around the mouth.


    ;)We need to cut a hole in the mouth and let this place slowly fill up with water then we sail out of the hole.


    "Ohh Yea like they do in submarines where did see a video on that," Mu asked the voice as he walked over to the cheek of the monster and gave it sizable hole with his super sharp cane.


    Mu ran back to his ship and just waited for the mouth to fill up then Mu sailed out of there with artificial wind.


    Mu surfaced about two kilometers away from the sea monster and noticed an Island with hundreds of boats either docked on it or around it.


    Mu looked at his map and he didn''t really know where he was but Mu made a guess that he was at Illegal Activity Island.


    ;)Well your a pirate right now so this will basically become your home until you want to do something else.


    "Yea your right I might as well go introduce myself I think I wanna become a pirate king so I gotta meet my subjects," Mu thought to the voice while he sailed into the island and pocketed his ship.

 33 Tour-Guide/Next Job

    As Mu walked around the giant city he started noticing a group of people gathering around one of the ships.


    Mu walked over to see what was going on and saw a man yelling for people to quiet the fuck down.


    The man then went on to explain why he had gathered the people here. He was a tour guide and was willing to give newbies to the island a tour of the city for free.


    Everyone here thought this was a scam so they cleared out. Except for Mu he was talking to the abyss about how good their luck was to find a free tour of the city.


    ;)You can''t really believe this guy right.


    "What does he have to gain off of us," Mu asked the voice.


    ;)I don''t know our fucking money, clothes, supplies, boat do I need to continue.


    "No but where else are we going to find a person to show us the city," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Just pay somebody and they will probably do it.


    "Yea but they wouldn''t be qualified," Mu thought to the voice.


    Mu and the abyss had been talking so long that Mu was the only one left in the courtyard. The man noticed Mu and started walking towards him.


    "Hello Sir, Names Alexander Tour-Guide my father before me Tour-Guide Sr. was a tour guide for fifty years he passed that experience down to me and now I pass it to you where in this fine city do you wish to go." Mr.Tour-Guide said real fast.


    ;)Does this guy talk in run-on sentences.


    "Looks like it,"Mu thought to the voice.


    "Yea if you could just show me where the bard guild is on this island that would be great," Mu said to Mr.Tour-Guide.


    "Sure diddy two titty," Mr.Tour-Guide said.


    Mu and Mr.Tour-Guide were like two long lost friends you could make their journey around the dirty city into a royalty free music montage.


    ;)Huh maybe I was wrong about this guy.


    "Yea he''s a cool dude," Mu thought to the voice.


    "We''ll just skip this part of the city and then end at the bards guild," Mr.Tour-Guide said looking at his map of the city.


    "Why would we skip that part of the city," Mu asked Mr. Tour-Guide said," Trust me you don''t want to go there."


    Mu was about to ask why again when Mr.Tour-Guide looked him dead in the eye and said," You.Do.Not.Want.To.Go.There."


    "Alright," Mu said.


    ;)Wonder what''s over there.


    "I don''t want to know," Mu thought to the voice.


    Mr.Tour-Guide finally showed Mu the bards guild and finished the tour.


    Before he left, him and Mu clasped hands and looked into each other''s eyes.


    They both said,"Brother," and let go walking in different directions.


    ;)The fuck was that?


    "You wouldn''t get it," Mu thought to the voice as he walked into the bards guild.


    What Mu saw inside rocked him to his core it was him he''s back.


    "Hello Mu what can I do for you?" The Receptionist asked.


    "N.no how how are you here did you follow me you bastard you''ve rated me enough," Mu screamed at the monster behind the counter.


    "I am everywhere and nowhere Mu you cannot escape me...no I''m just kidding I got transferred over here," The Receptionist said.


    "I..I need a place to sleep," Mu told The Receptionist while slowly walking towards him and handing over his bard card.


    "We always accommodate guild members," The Receptionist said with a wink.


    "Oh and you might want to look at the job board there''s a new one up there that might interest you," The Receptionist said while signing Mu in and handing back the bard card.


    Mu backed away from the counter hesitant to show his back to The Receptionist but he hit the job board and turned around to look.


    Quest type-World-Wide


    Requirements-A part of A-rank''s or an S-rank


    Description-Find and Kill the Pirate King trust me I''ll know when he''s dead and you will get your reward.


    Mu ripped the job off the wall and slammed it on The Receptionist''s counter.


    Mu looked at him and said in his deepest voice," I''ll take it."

 34 Detectives Mu and Abyss/The Pirate King” is Depressed

    "Alright you don''t have to be so forceful," The Receptionist said grabbing the job request.


    "It comes with this to get you started," The Receptionist bent down under the counter and rifled past the map to where the Pirate King is and grabbed a piece of hair.


    "Here," The Receptionist said handing over the hair.


    "Why would I need this how.how does this help me," Mu said looking at The Receptionist.


    "It''s a piece of the Pirate Kings hair," The Receptionist said.


    "I''m not a fucking dog I can''t smell this and get his scent," Mu threw the piece of hair down.


    "I..I don''t know do some detective shit case the scene and all that," The Receptionist said flustered.


    "What Fucking Scene!"Mu yelled at The Receptionist.


    "Umm I don''t know just go do your job bye," The Receptionist hid behind the counter whispering something about marks.


    Mu walked out of the bard guild flipping on his non-existent trench coat.


    Mu knew he wasn''t gonna get anymore out of that witness.


    ;)Uhh what the fuck are you doing.


    "Some detective shit," Mu thought to the voice while walking down the street.


    ;)Alright partner I''ll go see some of the other witnesses.


    "Alright," Mu thought to the voice.


    So after three hours of Mu appearing in people''s houses and interrogating them and the abyss appearing in peoples heads and interrogating their very soul they finally had a lead.


    Detective Mu thought to the voice," I got a lead come back to me."


    Detective ;) Spill it.


    "Hey! I''m not a suspect keep that grammar to them," Mu thought to the voice.


    Detective ;) Sorry your right so what is it.


    "Alright so on November 22, 1963 Lee Harvey Oswald...ohh wait that''s the wrong lead. Uhh it was..oh yea 2 months back a man claiming to be the Pirate King set up shop on the docks demanding taxes," Detective Mu thought to the voice.


    Detective ;) Well any old shmuck could say they were the Pirate King.


    "This guys got the mark," Detective Mu thought to the voice.


    Detective ;) Is it forged.


    "Don''t look like it," Detective Mu thought to the voice.


    Detective ;)This could explain why somebody wants him killed they don''t want to pay his taxes no more.


    "Let''s go and get him then," Detective Mu thought to the voice while walking towards the docks.


    Once Detectives Mu and abyss got to the docks they proceeded to raid the warehouse of this potential Pirate King.


    Inside they found a lone man crying while drinking ale.


    "On the ground!!" Detective Mu shouted at the man.


    The man cries while lying on the ground he looks up at Detective Mu and says," Just kill me...I''m so depressed lately my wife left me,and my kids disowned me just end it..please."


    "Are you the Pirate King," Detective Mu asked the man.


    "If I say yes will you kill me," The man said staring into Detective Mu''s soul.


    "Uhh sure," Detective Mu said to the man.


    "Then yes yes I am now please kill me," the "Pirate King" stared at Detective Mu with puppy dog eyes pleading to be executed right here and now.


    "Alright," Detective Mu said knocking the "Pirate King" unconscious.


    ;)You didn''t kill him.


    "Nah time will do that I knocked him out indefinitely he''ll die in three to five days from dehydration," Mu thought to the voice walking out of the workhouse.


    ;)That''s cold man real cold I''m not even sure if that was the current Pirate King Ohh and are we no longer detectives.


    "No we''re not and what makes you say that," Mu asked the voice.


    ;)Well The Receptionist had a map leading directly to the Pirate King and it was nowhere near this warehouse.


    "So what your saying is," Mu thought to the voice opening his eyes real wide.


    ;)I think we just killed a depressed man with a weird mark.

 35 Getting The Map/The Hunt Begins

    ;)Did you really think it would be this easy.


    "Yea I should have known this is gonna be a few free easy chapters of just island hopping no Author,hollowed be his name, wouldn''t use that freebie," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Hey should we tell that guys family he''s dead.


    "Hmm what guy," Mu thought to the voice scratching the back of his head.


    ;)The guy in the warehouse.


    "No guy in no warehouse I''ve never killed an innocent civilian before. I''m just gonna tone you out cause obviously your going crazy," Mu thought to the voice while fast walking towards the bard guild.


    ;)oh wait no you didn''t kill him you could go and wake him up.


    But Mu had already toned out the voice so he didn''t hear it.


    Mu arrived at the bards guild and kicked in the door while pointing his finger at The Receptionist.


    "Where''s the map!" Mu yelled at The Receptionist.


    "M..map I umm I don''t know what maps are," The Receptionist said.


    "Oh really..ok then," Mu started walking out of the guild house.


    The Receptionist was shocked but started going back to his work.


    Right before Mu left though he turned around and asked The Receptionist a simple question," Hey, what''s that in your hand?"


    The Receptionist looked up smiled and said without thinking," oh this it''s just a map to the Pirate King..." that''s when The Receptionist realized what he just said.


    "Haha! You bastard hand it over you thought I couldn''t see through your impeccable lie," Mu said walking up to The Receptionist.


    ;)Was it though.


    The Receptionist reluctantly handed over the map while putting his head down.


    Before Mu left he turned around again and asked The Receptionist a question,"Why did you do it?"


    The Receptionist looked up and said,"Because after all the times I''ve rated you I''ve come to realize something, I think I love you Mu."


    Mu and the voice both said,"What?"


    Mu looked at The Receptionist and cleared his throat,"umm well I don''t like you like that mainly cause I''m not into men but also because you''ve been a huge dick every time we meet."Mu said to The Receptionist.


    Mu then awkwardly exited the packed guild house while other bards gave him the stink eye.


    ;)Uhh so I guess we should get going.


    "Yeah let the hunt begin or something," Mu thought to the voice still shook from The Receptionist declaration of love.

 36 Why Are You Helping Them/The Pilgrams

    Mu was resting on his boat one evening because he had set a course into his smart boat and was really bored.


    When suddenly Mu heard the distinct sounds of people screaming for help.


    Mu got up and looked over to where it was coming from. What he saw was an entire ship sinking into the shark infested waters beneath it.


    "Oh shit they might know where the Pirate King is I should go help them," Mu said to no one.


    ;)The fuck...you already know where the Pirate King is.


    But Mu was changing his course on his smart boat so he didn''t hear the voice.


    Mu sailed up beside the ship and started speaking to its passengers.


    Mu yelled," Do you know where the Pirate King is?"


    ;)Mu what the fuck you know where the Pirate King why are you helping these people to figure out where he is.


    All the passengers on the ship looked at Mu and then looked at each other before shouting out,"Yea if you help us we''ll tell you."


    "You here that demon inside my head," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)I''m not a demon you shithead.


    The Abyss proceeded to metaphysically smack Mu''s skull.


    This jiggled Mu''s brain waking him up.


    "Owww what the fuck voice why did you do that I was sleeping," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Uhh no your not your acting like an idiot hero who is helping people to figure out something he already knows.


    "I would never do that that''s useless..." before Mu finished that train of thought however he looked around him and saw himself doing exactly that.


    "How did I get here?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;) I think you were sleep MC-ing.


    "The fuck does that mean," Mu thought to the voice as he started killing the sharks surrounding his boat.


    ;)You were being an idiotic main character in you dreams and your body acted it out


    "That doesn''t make sense I always have the same dream of me falling infinitely," Mu thought to the voice as he killed the last shark and grew his boat to accommodate his new passengers.


    ;)Then I guess it must have been the Author,hollowed be his name, expressing his anger with another hero who did this exact thing in a story he actually liked.


    "I guess,anyways I''m gonna go help these people. But not to find the Pirate King simply because I''m a nice person," Mu thought to the voice while walking towards his passengers.


    They were cultist trying to escape from "religious persecution" by going to another island.


    They gave Mu the directions to the island and then started doing dances and ceremonies right on the deck of his ship.


    The cult for the most part left Mu alone except for their missionaries who kept trying to convert him.


    So Mu just made a Captains quarters in which he locked himself in the entire ride to the island.


    It wasn''t that far to the island just about a day but that night a freak gust of wind pushed the ship off course.


    Normally this couldn''t happen because Mu would fix the course but he was asleep at the time so they landed north of where they were supposed to be.


    Mu being nice person wanted to sail them south to where they were supposed to be. But they decided that their god had put them here and this is where they will be.


    Before they left the ship they signed a contract which laid down the rules of their colony and they decided on a name for themselves "The Pilgrams."


    ;)That''s not the correct spelling.


    "What do you mean," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)It''s Pilgrims not Pilgrams.


    "I think they know how to spell their name," Mu thought to the voice while sailing away from the cult colony.


    ;)Why do I even try...just go kill the Pirate King.

 37 Cove Village/A Pirates Death

    ;)Is this the island?


    "Yea this is the island," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)How do you know?


    "Trust me this pirate plot has gone on long enough this is the island," Mu thought to the voice while jumping onto the island.


    Mu started walking around the island looking for any sign of human life.


    On the other side of the island there was a huge cove and inside it was a village.


    Mu looked into the village and saw happy woman and children.


    "Are we in the right place?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)That''s what I asked you.


    "No no it has to be the right place," Mu thought to the voice while starting his walk towards the village.


    Right before Mu entered into the village he was stopped by a unit of guards dressed like stereotypical pirates.


    "Halt! State your business in our village," the leader of the pirate guards asked.


    "Hey, I was just wondering if the Pirate King lives here?" Mu asked the pirate guard.


    "If he does what would you do?" The pirate guard captain asked.


    "Uhh ask for his autograph," Mu said hoping the pirate guard captain believed him.


    "Ohh I didn''t know the old man had fans alright come right on in," the pirate guard said.


    Mu was led to the center of the pirate village where an old man was selling fish and talking to everyone.


    "Hey old man you have a visitor he''s a fan of yours," the pirate guard said before leaving to continue his route.


    "Ohh follow me then," the old man said leading Mu away from the village to the top of the cove.


    Mu had to help the old man on the incline but when they reached the area overlooking the sea the old man just stopped.


    "I''m sure you know this already but I''m the Pirate King," The old man looked at the sea with a loving gaze as he continued his story.


    "I''ve lived my entire live on the sea as a pirate and I want a pirates death who has ever heard of a pirate dying of old age." The old Pirate King looked at Mu and sighed.


    "Your not gonna get anything for this quest but you will be fulfilling this old mans last wish," the old Pirate King pulled up his cane in a sword stance and shakily yelled," Avast ye!"


    The old Pirate King came at Mu with his cane and Mu pulled out his easily overtaking the old man.


    As Mu was about to stop and talk some sense into the old man the Pirate King swung his cane and Mu instinctively hit back. This knocked the old Pirate King off the ledge.


    Mu could have saved the old Pirate King but when he looked at his eyes Mu saw resignation and happiness, and so he let him fall and have his pirates death.


    "I think I''m done with this sea shit," Mu said bringing out his map.


    ;)Same what''s the closest land locked kingdom to us.


    "Let me see its called The Holy Kingdom of Pantheon." Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Oh god that place sounds like a theocracy.


    "Huh the fucks a theocracy," Mu thought to the voice.

 38 Mu Doesn’t Understand Geography/Why Are There So Many Gods

    ;)So do we tell them the old mans dead.


    "Nah they''ll figure it out," Mu thought to the voice while walking towards the sea.


    The Holy Kingdom of Pantheon was only about two hours away by high speed sailing.


    Not much happened in these two hours except for Mu and the abyss having an argument on why they aren''t flying through the sky.


    ;)I''m just saying that you can make the flight enchantment and fly so why don''t you?


    "Maybe some people just don''t like being miles above the ground in a fucking boat," Mu thought to the voice.


    Mu looked around him and realized he was already beached on the sands of The Holy Kingdom of Pantheon.


    "Oh we''re here," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Well this can''t be it.


    "What do you mean?" Mu thought to the voice while packing up his ship.


    ;)This place isn''t landlocked.


    "Sure it is there''s land and I would guess there are locks somewhere here," Mu thought to the voice totally seriously.


    ;)Really...Do you not understand geography.


    "I hadn''t taken that class before I broke the space-time whatever," Mu thought to the voice as he looked at the map and started walking towards the capital of this kingdom.


    ;)Space-Time continuum,umm how old are you Mu?


    "Well I was sixteen but now I don''t know," Mu thought to the voice as he was talking he noticed it was getting dark so he started setting up camp.


    They finished the argument with the abyss asking how he could be sixteen and a failed musician.


    Mu answered by saying that anyone at any age can be a failed musician.


    Mu was about to go to sleep when suddenly his detection enchantment started pinging like crazy.


    "Shit what''s around me," Mu thought. He kept listening but all he heard was the hundreds of pings from the detection enchantment.


    Mu realized just standing here wasn''t going to help him so he shouted to whoever or whatever it was.


    "Hello I know your all there!" Mu shouted to the forest around him.


    All Mu heard back was a voice screaming,"No you don''t."


    "Y..Yea I do just come out before I start throwing out AoE skills!" Mu shouted into the trees.


    A hulking beast of a man walked out of the trees and said,"You couldn''t hurt us mortal for we are gods."


    After he said that hundreds of other "people" appeared behind him either old or young, male or female there were hundreds of them.


    Mu just sighed and thought,"oh there just gods alright. I wonder why there''s so many of them talk about over specialization."

 39 I’ll Worship The God of Corn/Nothing

    "So what do you gods and goddesses want?" Mu asked the hundreds of divine in front of him.


    "Well first we want some respect I don''t work my ass off all day to be treated like this," One of the goddesses in the back said.


    "Silence!" The giant man yelled knocking down a few trees.


    "We need you to pledge yourself to one of us if you want to walk on this land." The giant man said accentuating every word with a bodybuilder pose.


    "And I f I don''t want to what will happen," Mu asked the man while sitting down.


    "Well then we won''t allow you to be in this kingdom," After the giant man said this all the gods transformed into a debatably copyright infringing Power Rangers.


    "Is this supposed to scare me you know I''m stronger than you," Mu said looking at the cosplaying gods.


    "We know but it is our solemn duty to keep this land holy and full of faith filled people," the giant man said.


    Mu thought for a bit until he finally said"Well I''m not gonna pledge to any of you, are you guys maybe hiring I could just become a divine."


    The gods and goddesses looked at each other and talked before they finally decided.


    The giant man walked up to Mu and said," Alright your hired but the only divinities left are these."


    The giant man handed Mu a piece of paper with a list of available divinities.


    AVAILABLE DIVINITIES


    ***


    ***


    ***


    CORN


    ***


    ***


    "There''s only corn left," Mu said to the man.


    All the gods started laughing but after they were done the giant man explained the corn divinity to him.


    "Well it wasn''t supposed to exist but the Goddess of Agriculture hates that crop so much she gave up a piece of her divinity, just so she doesn''t have to oversee it."


    Mu thought for a bit and decided that corn was pretty badass so why not.


    The ceremony wasn''t that elaborate al the gods and goddesses just cut their palms and Mu had to drink it all.


    ;)oh god that looks disgusting.


    "Hey watch it with that language I''m technically a god now," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Yea of corn.


    "I wonder what power it gave me," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Nothing you couldn''t have given yourself.


    Mu looked himself up and down and noticed that the only difference was he now had abs.


    "Nice," Mu thought to himself while touching them.


    In another part of the universe nothing at all was going on.

 40 Church Fees/Be

    ;)Why did you do that?


    "What the whole become a god thing...I thought it would be cool," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Why your stronger than any god what''s cooler than that.


    "Well yea I am but nobody knows that people know who the god of corn is," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Do they?


    "Whatever...it didn''t effect my power did it?" Mu thought to the voice kind of concerned.


    ;)Well...no it didn''t it just gave you the ability to grow corn from your hands which you could have just given yourself.


    "Wait I can grow." Before Mu could finish that thought he ran into a wall and screamed in pain.


    ;)We''re here.


    "What how we were near the coast it should have taken like two more days to get here are we teleporting?" Mu thought to the voice as he rubbed his nose and got into the line streaming from the gate.


    As Mu was waiting he looked around and noticed thousands of people living around the city walls in what look like slums.


    And there were hundreds of guards in full something armor keeping them from getting in line.


    ;)I think that''s mithril.


    "What is that?" Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Do you really not know? It''s a pretty expensive material but it does protect against a lot of shit.


    "Oh well..how the fuck did you know that?" Mu thought to the voice as he was nearing the gates.


    ;)I''ve been around long enough.


    "You do know that''s a pretty half-assed answer." Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Yea well...your at the gates so shut the fuck up.


    The guard looked Mu up and down and said," Name and Church of Affiliation."


    "Mu and I''m apart of the Church of The Corn God." Mu said to the guard.


    The guard took a few seconds to process what Mu had just said but then he looked up and asked Mu.


    "Are you sure there hasn''t been a God of Corn in about a century." The guard proceeded to hand Mu a piece of paper.


    "I''m sure," Mu said to the guard.


    "Alright then just pay the church fees on that paper and you can go on in," the guard said before holding out his hand waiting for the money.


    Mu looked at the piece of paper.


    CHURCH FEES


    CHURCH OF THE LIGHT GOD-2 GOLD PIECES


    CHURCH OF THE DARKNESS GODDESS-2 GOLD PIECES


    The list continued on showcasing all 125 Gods and Goddesses excluding the God of Corn and their fees.


    "Do I have to pay all of them or just my churches?" Mu asked the guard.


    "All of them," the guard said putting his hand down as it had gotten tired.


    Mu started calculating the fees together and said to the guard, " That''s over 100 gold how is the average citizen supposed to pay that?"


    The guard looked at Mu and and smiled from ear to ear and said,"Their not, they live out here in the shadows of the walls away from the divines light. As it is not for those who can not help the churches by paying these small fees."


    Mu payed the fees to the insane guard and walked into the city.


    The streets were paved in literal gold and there were statues everywhere showcasing every god and goddess.


    Currently going down the main road was a parade also showing every god and goddess each with their own theme and flair.


    Mu watched the parade to its eventual conclusion and as the last cart wheeled by it seemed to be the grandest most money draining one.


    On it sat three people and one god Mu immediately recognized one of them as the giant god who he talked to in the forest.


    There were people shouting out the names of all three their was the light god who was the giant man, High Priest of The Light Dave Evil, and finally Holy Knight Captain Hanani Ichigai.


    ;)Wait what was that last one again?


    "What Holy Knight Captain Hanani Ichigai what about him?" Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)How much you wanna bet he''s from Japan.

 41 The Church of the God of Corn/Recruiting

    Mu was walking around looking for an inn or someplace to sleep.


    But all he could see were either churches,statues, or wells dedicated to different gods or goddesses.


    ;)Where do they get their food?


    "God of Agriculture I guess," Mu thought to the voice while walking towards a random church.


    ;)Maybe.


    Mu opened the doors to the grand church and was immediately washed away by tons of water.


    Mu heard a voice coming from the door scream,"Close that fucking door do you know how much I work to get that water in here!"


    Mu looked up and saw a woman who he recognized as the Water Goddess from the parade.


    "Hey yea..I just had a question on where I can sleep in this city," Mu asked while drying himself off.


    "Oh your the new God of Corn right, well most people just sleep in their god or goddesses church," the water goddess said.


    "But I don''t have a church so where can I sleep," Mu said.


    The Water Goddess looked perplexed and said,"Sure you have a church, I''m pretty sure it''s in the eastern district right between The Goddess of Fertility and The God of Agriculture."


    "Really...well where am I right now?" Mu asked the goddess.


    "Your in the central district where all the elemental gods and goddess live," The Water Goddess said while walking back into her church.


    Mu started walking in a direction he discerned as East because of a flower growing in a red rock pointing that direction.


    ;)You can''t actually believe that''s gonna work right?


    "Don''t question my methods," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)how are you even going to tell you''ve made it to the God of Agriculture''s church?


    "I don''t know..fucking crops probably," Mu thought to the voice starting to get mad at the constant questioning.


    ;)It won''t be that easy right?


    It was actually that easy because Mu arrived at his church not even 20 minutes later.


    However it wasn''t the God of Agriculture''s church that helped him find it instead it was The Goddess of Fertility''s.


    It was so easy because Mu heard it 5 minutes before he saw it and that was all Mu wanted to describe.


    The first thing Mu did when he arrived at his church,which wasn''t that decrepit, was enchant the walls to not let in sound from the outside.


    Mu walked in and noticed the entire place was empty and full of dust.


    ;)So what do we do now.


    "Isn''t it obvious," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)No.


    "No that''s where you chime in with the idea and then I agree with it like that''s what I wanted to do too," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)umm... I guess we go out and start recruiting followers?


    "YEAH!! Wait how are we going to do that?" Mu thought to the voice while laying on the ground.

 42 The Outer City/You Want Some Corn

    Mu woke up the next morning head full of one idea.


    "Alright I think I know where we are going to get followers," Mu thought to the voice as he popped his back.


    ;)Where?


    "You know that other city on the walls of this one," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Ohh you wanna go recruit followers by feeding those starving people corn.


    "Well yea...but I was supposed to say it," Mu thought in a whisper.


    ;)What was that?


    "Nothing, nothing...you just broke the dialogue and made it way shorter," Mu thought to the voice whispering the last part.


    ;)Whatever, can we just go?


    "Sure, sure...fucking dick," Mu thought to the voice not whispering the last part.


    ;)I heard that.


    "Heard what?" Mu thought while metaphorically running out of this conversation..by actually running out of this conversation towards the outer city.


    Mu arrived at the gates not even a minute later thanks to super speed.


    The guards allowed him to leave without any worry since word had spread about the new god and they knew who he was now.


    This was good in one hand and bad in the other because now whenever they looked at him they did the creepy ear to ear smile.


    ;)These people are on something.


    "Yea too much faith has probably broken them. That or stress as they are literally living in the same city as the god or goddess they believe in," Mu thought to the voice as he walked into the outer city.


    The place was crowded and dirty with people strewn out on the ground in various conditions ranging from starvation,nudity, and even a few dead bodies.


    ;)Why aren''t the gods and goddesses helping these people?


    "I don''t know I guess it''s like that one guard said they don''t help the church so the church doesn''t help them," Mu thought to the voice as he started looking around for a stand.


    ;)That''s bullshit they have all this power what do they need gold for. They could at least make sure people aren''t dying in the streets around their city.


    Mu found himself a stand as the abyss kept talking.


    "Alright I''m ready to recruit some followers," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)You mean help some people.


    "Can''t I do both," Mu thought to the voice as he got up to scream something to the crowd in front of him.


    Mu thought for a bit and then screamed," DO YOU WANT SOME CORN!"


    Mu then put up both of his arms up in the air when he saw that everyone was looking at him and made two stalks of corn come out of his hands.


    Needless to say the theatrics worked on these starving citizens as they rushed towards Mu.


    ;)Did you really have to do that?

 43 Invasion of Privacy/High Priest of The God of Corn

    The mob rushed towards Mu with hunger and greed flashing in their eyes.


    ;)Do they want a monopoly on corn?


    Right before they reached Mu however they crashed into an invisible barrier halting their progress.


    Mu looked up and screamed in a demonic voice,"Single Fucking File!"


    All the people stopped scared out of their minds and unconsciously moved their shaking piss soaked legs into a single file line.


    ;)You didn''t have to scare them.


    "I just wanted to test out this new ability I gave myself," Mu thought to the voice while doing imaginary puppy dog eyes.


    ;)Alright whatever..what''s it called?


    "Cafeteria lady voice," Mu thought to the voice as the first person came up to him.


    The starving and scared man walked up to Mu and outstretched his hands.


    Mu put 10 stalks of corn into his arms and handed him a bag of seeds which were guaranteed to grow.


    Mu explained the seeds to the man and sent him on his way.


    ;)Why didn''t you recruit him?


    "Because he wouldn''t have been a good follower," Mu kept handing out stalks and seeds and sending people on their way.


    Except sometimes Mu would stop someone and tell them he was the God of Corn and that he would be willing to accept them into his church.


    ;)Alright you can''t just not explain this how do you know some people will be or won''t be a good follower.


    "Isn''t it obvious...alright listen I''m looking into their minds and checking out their personality if it''s good then I ask them if they want to join," Mu thought to the voice while still handing out food and seeds.


    ;)Well...I guess that makes sense one thing though.


    "What?" Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)You have all of these followers but no High Priest or Priestess also isn''t that an invasion of privacy.


    "Oh shit your right who''s gonna do my job for me," Mu thought to the voice ignoring the other complaint.


    ;)Well there''s no need to be an asshole about it.


    "Huh what do you mean I really do want somebody to do my job for me this shit is boring," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Then why are we here?


    "I thought it would be fun and now I''ve seen obvious abuse and now I can''t leave without doing something about it," Mu thought to the voice while sighing.


    ;)What do you think your a hero you could leave anytime you want.


    "Yeah but it would weigh on my conscious," Mu thought to the voice.


    Mu was looking into the mind of the last person and saw something that shocked him to his core.


    Inside the mind of this person was pure good, no hate, no envy, and the best of them all corn.


    "You''re perfect," Mu said while looking at the person before him.


    It was a 12 year old kid who looked pure evil he had coal black eyes, pale skin, and a cold as ice smile.


    But Mu had seen into the kids mind and knew he was good so he tried to recruit him.


    Usually churches and children aren''t a good match but Mu had actually only chosen good people to be apart of his.


    "How would you like to be my high priest," Mu said to the kid.


    The kid looked up stunned and asked Mu," Are you a god sir."


    "I''m the God of Corn kid," Mu said while striking a pose.


    The kid looked extremely excited,"Really sir I..I love corn."


    "What''s your name kid?" Mu asked the child.


    The kid immediately said,"Cornelius Cornfall."


    ;)Honestly this is so unrealistic who would name their kid..


    Mu intercepted the abysses dialogue and said," Shut up I don''t care,he''s perfect."


    ;)Don''t say that about a kid.


    "I mean as a high priest," Mu thought to the voice realizing how he sounded.


    ;)Sure.


    Cornelius was the last person in line so they stood there for hours while he thought about the offer.


    Cornelius looked at Mu with steely determination in his black eyes and said," Alright I''m in."

 44 The Corn System/The Anth Eis

    Mu was walking around the outer city with Cornelius talking about their arrangement.


    "So am I gonna get paid?" Cornelius asked looking up at Mu.


    Mu thought for a bit before saying,"No, but I will give you one special power."


    Cornelius was perplexed so he asked Mu," What do you mean ''Special Power''?"


    "I mean that I will give you any power that you want," Mu said.


    Cornelius went deep into thought before looking at Mu and saying,"I want the power to grow stronger."


    Mu looked at Cornelius like he had just thrown a five star meal out the window and said,"Cornelius...do you know how dumb that is you could have wished for anything and you choose that!"


    Cornelius started blushing and looked down at the ground.


    ;)You asshole...what''s wrong with his wish.


    "Are you being serious he could have wished for any power like time stop, or immortality and he chooses the power to grow stronger. Do you know how vague that is." Mu thought to the voice getting genuinely mad at Cornelius'' choice.


    ;)Damn...alright so what do you want to give him.


    "Umm let me think,"Mu said while looking back on his past adventures for some inspiration.


    "What was that one thing from the rich kingdom," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)oh no..you wanna make him a trap.


    "What! No anything but that..please don''t remind me," Mu thought while shaking.


    "It was that one fishing thing it allowed some guy to kill nearly an entire family line," Mu said while replaying the event in his mind.


    ;)Oh the fisherman system yeah I guess we could give him that.


    "No not the fisherman system I''m gonna give him something even better," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)What?


    "The Corn System," Mu said while trying not to laugh.


    ;)The what.


    "The Corn System it will make it so that the more corn he eats the stronger he gets," Mu thought to the voice.


    Mu said sorry to Cornelius for making fun of him and then explained The Corn System to him.


    Cornelius'' black soulless eyes lit up in excitement as he thought about how perfect this power was.


    They kept exploring the city and talking about what a high priest does and is in the church until they got to one section of the city.


    It was arguably the most shadowed over place in the city because it had a canopy over it.


    Which really serves no purpose as the God of Weather lived in this city and kept the place sunny.


    Cornelius didn''t want to take Mu in that part of the city and instead just explained what was in there.


    "Well not everyone in this place believe the gods and goddesses and this is where they come," Cornelius said just trying to hurry past this place.


    "Wait..your telling me that they don''t believe in gods and goddesses when they literally live in their city," Mu said raising his voice on the last parts.


    "No you misheard me they don''t believe them, they know they exist but they don''t think they are gods and goddesses," Cornelius clarified.


    "Oh so what they think they are just really powerful humans?" Mu asked.


    ;)I mean that''s what you are.


    "Yea your right, but I mean what''s the difference between a human with the power of a god and a god," Mu thought to the voice.


    "So what do they call themselves?" Mu asked Cornelius.


    Cornelius looked at Mu for a second before answering,"Their names I guess."


    Mu started laughing while clarifying,"No I mean their idea what do they call it."


    "Oh they call it Anth Eism and they are Anth Eist," Cornelius said.


    "You mean Atheism and Atheist," Mu said.


    "No, what are those?" Cornelius asked.


    ;)Well it''s definitely depressing.


    "Whoa you can''t just diss a religion like that," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Well it is..and you did the same thing.


    "When?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)When you said churches and children don''t mix that was obviously a diss on the Catholic Church.


    "Well I mean...yea I guess your right," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)So can we agree that Atheism is depressing.


    "What no I''m not gonna agree with you on that even if I agree that you are allowed to say it," Mu thought to the voice.

 45 Burn Baby Burn/Raid Motherfucker

    Mu and Cornelius were walking to the spot where Mu had told all of his potential followers to gather.


    Everyone who Mu had asked to join his church was there.


    ;)You may be a lot of things but you are good at picking people.


    "Well it wasn''t that hard I did look into their very being after all," Mu thought to the voice as he stood up in front of his "followers".


    ;)Just take the goddamn compliment see this is why...


    Mu drowned out the voice with white voice so that he wouldn''t have to hear his rant.


    Mu then started explained to all the people the arrangement he wanted them to be apart of.


    The main points however where that.


    1.They didn''t actually have to worship him just pretend too so that they can look like a church.


    2.They would get free food and lodging.


    3.They would not get paid but they could work elsewhere.


    4.Free passage in and out of the divine city because his tax would be 0 gold.


    "So we all good," Mu said to the group as the sun started dipping below the sky.


    They were all allowed to enter the city as they were being accompanied by a god but it wasn''t all smooth sailing.


    Mu and his "followers" were passing by the goddess of fertility''s church/club hybrid when suddenly a group of people being led by a woman stopped them.


    The woman was the goddess of fertility and she said,"What''s up virgins..how would you like to hang with us instead of this pussy."


    Mu started seeing red and said,"Hey bitch how about you step aside and let me walk into my church. Before I walk into yours and burn it to the ground."


    The Goddess pretended to be scared and said,"Oh no the big bad corn god is gonna hurt me."


    All her followers started laughing and Mu completely snapped.


    Mu took his cane and enchanted it to always burn no matter what was done to it and launched it into the fertility church.


    Needless to say the place burned like a matchbox, the goddess was crying as other gods and goddesses tried to put it out.


    Mu didn''t see any of this however as right after he threw his cane he walked all of his "followers" into his church.


    ;)Hey don''t you think you went a little overboard there I mean their gonna start asking questions.


    "And do what?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)I don''t know but it won''t be good.


    "Won''t be good, won''t be good I''ll tell you what "won''t be good". It "won''t be good" if I blow this entire goddamn continent up!" Mu screamed to the voice.


    ;)whoa whoa..slow down..cool off...it''s alright ok.


    Mu closed his eyes and took a deep breath before thinking to the voice," Yea I''m alright that goddess just gets me so mad..she''s such a bitch."


    ;)She is, but hey you burned down her church so y''all are even.


    "Yeah yeah, we are," Mu thought to the voice as he laid down on the floor and went to sleep.


    Unbeknownst to Mu or anybody else a group of fifteen people had just snuck into the city.


    These people were a rebel group of Anth Eist that wanted to prove the gods and goddesses were lying by any means necessary.


    They heard that a new god was in town and decided that he would be the best one to interrogate or possibly kill because he hadn''t consolidated his power.


    They where ready to bust in the windows when one of their members found out the back door was unlocked.


    They proceeded to just walk into the church and throw their equivalent of a flash bang which woke everyone up.


    Mu''s eyes flew open and saw a sword pointed right at his throat.


    A obviously fake deep voice said,"You move you die."


    Mu gave himself immortality before asking the person,"What..What the hell is going on?"


    The person smiled under their mask and before they could remember to make their voice deep.


    A squeaky almost childlike voice said,"Your being Raided Motherfucker."

 46 Dark Phoenix Alliance/Interval/About Time

    "Ok so obviously we have an issue here, I suggest we put away the swords and simply talk it out," Mu said to the masked "child".


    The masked "child" started looking annoyed and screamed out,"God you sound like my dad!"


    ;)Haha your old.


    "Shut up your older than me," Mu thought to the voice.


    "We the "Dark Phoenix Alliance" are gonna find out if your a god or not," the masked "child" said.


    This decree was followed by everyone of the members screeching into the air with similar childlike voices.


    "Ok so I''m presuming that you are Mr.Phoenix the leader of this group," Mu said.


    "Wow, no shit for brains it''s the name of our guild my name is Lorean Death-bane," Death-bane said.


    "Ok, Mr. Death-bane I will answer your question and then ask you to leave my church alright," Mu said standing up.


    "Sit back down!" Lorean yelled.


    Mu looked at him and said,"Stab me."


    Lorean looked stunned and asked," What?"


    "Stab me and your question will be answered," Mu said walking towards Lorean.


    Lorean reacted pretty quick and stabbed Mu right through his heart.


    Mu just stood there with his heart impaled and asked,"We done here?"


    Lorean about shit his pants before dropping his swords and running out of the church screaming.


    The other guild members saw their leader running out of the building and promptly packed their shit and ran too.


    ;)Take that you whippersnappers


    "You really are old," Mu thought to the voice before falling back to sleep.


    In another part of the universe.


    ;)Oh god not another one of these.


    A very heated debate was going on about the synopsis of the book.


    One side is arguing about how it has been the same since the start and the other is arguing that it doesn''t explain shit.


    In actuality there were no two sides it was really only one man with an overactive imagination and possible split personality disorder.


    That man is me the author and I have been arguing with myself about wether I should change the story to fit around the synopsis or vise-versa.


    After two weeks of this shit I have finally decided that fuck it I like the story and I don''t like the synopsis.


    I also realize that this whole joke will be dated to any newcomers who have only read the new one but I''m also to lazy to get rid of this.


    So I''m sorry.


    ;)Dude nobody cares for this shit.


    I do so suck it.


    Back to your regularly scheduled program.


    Mu woke up in the morning and had a brand new plan.


    "It''s time to leave," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Yeah it is about time..I''m surprised you stuck around this long.


    "Well I did have to find somebody to give the corn godship to,"Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Yeah and I have an idea on how to help all the people in the outer city.


    "Oh yea what?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)Lets just give the gods and goddesses a permanent effect that makes them do something good for their followers inside and outside of the city once a month.


    "Alright," Mu thought to the voice ready to act out his plan.


    Mu got everything done,Cornelius was really sad to see him go, and started walking down the road away from the divine city.


    ;)So what''s the plan now?


    "You know how we''ve been really charitable to everyone we meet," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Well not really but sure, what about it?


    "Well I wanna steal some shit," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)So you wanna be...


    "A thief,"Mu thought finishing the sentence for the voice.


    ;)But we''ve been a thief this entire time.


    "Huh how?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)How many caravans have we robbed?


    "Ohh shit speaking of caravans I need to rob another one," Mu thought to the voice, completely letting the meaning of the question slip from one ear and out the other.


    ;)Of course you do.

 47 Mu’s Pocket Dimension/Thiefdom

    Mu was walking towards the next kingdom when the abyss asked.


    ;)Where exactly are you going to put all your stolen shit?


    Mu thought for a bit before asking the voice,"Could I keep it with you?"


    ;)What?


    "Well you live in the abyss right just put it somewhere near you and don''t let it float away," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)No I''m not gonna be your storage facility you asshole.


    "Well where else do you want me to put it they could be stolen back if I leave them on this world," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Oh no your stolen goods will be stolen..if you care that much just make your own dimension.


    "I can do that?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)Yea just give yourself the ability "Dimension Builder" or whatever name you want to give it.


    "Alright," Mu thought to the voice before trying it out.


    Dementia Constructor 3:00:00


    ;)That''s a shit joke.


    "Get it cause..I misspelled dimension and instead gave myself the ability to make dementia," Mu thought to the voice while laughing.


    ;)Yea it''s peak comedy Mu but can we get on with this.


    Mu stopped laughing at his joke and said,"Yeah sure."


    Dimension Constructor 3:00:00


    ;)Why didn''t you call it "Dimension Builder"


    "Uhh because fuck you also your banned from my dimension," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)What why?


    "Because it will be my place of peace," Mu said while winking.


    ;)oh you wanna Ja.. ok well there''s no problem then.


    Mu made a infinite grey space with which had the ability to store and recall anything he put in it.


    Mu put the gateway to this place on a tiny piece of metal which he then molded into his forearm.


    ;)Quick question what''s the name of this kingdom we''re going too.


    "Let me see it says Carl''s Thiefdom, oh wait no it''s changing..now it''s Susan''s Thiefdom," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Oh great a Thiefdom how convenient.


    "What is that?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)Its exactly as it sounds whatever thief has stolen the crown gets to be the king or queen until it gets stolen from them.


    "That sounds like a terrible way to do government," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Oh yea it''s complete anarchy but nobody will try to take them over because nobody wants them as citizens.


    "I can''t believe my luck to be going to a Thiefdom when I wanna be a thief," Mu thought to the voice while smiling.


    ;)Yeah..luck

 48 Bet 2/SOCKS

    Unlike the Holy Kingdom of Pantheon John''s Thiefdom had towns and cities like a regular kingdom but they were all very empty.


    Not meaning that there was no people just that there was no stuff.


    There were tons of people but they had no houses and few had clothes, they most likely had either sold them or had them stolen.


    Nobody talked to anybody either they just kinda slinked around in the shadows trying to find a target.


    Mu avoided all these towns and directly headed for Samantha''s Thiefdom Capital.


    ;)This is a dead kingdom there is nothing to do here. Can we just skip it and go to the next one?


    "No..I want to be a thief here not in whatever kingdom is next," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)This is gonna be too easy I mean you literally just have to give yourself invisibility and boom you win.


    "Yea I know that''s why I''m not gonna use my power to get through this. I will be a legit thief," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Really?


    "Ok I might give myself photographic memory so that it doesn''t take as long but that''s it unless things get dire," Mu admitted to the voice.


    ;)Alright...how about we bet on it.


    "Don''t we already have a bet going on?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)That was more of a sarcastic comment it was pretty obvious that he was Japanese.


    "Did you get that from his name,Hanani Ichigai, he could have been Korean," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)No..no he was Japanese.


    "But you don''t know that though," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Well it doesn''t matter anyways..that wasn''t a real bet this will be.


    "So what are the stakes?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)If I win, and you can''t become king with nothing other than photographic memory then you have to...be naked for an entire day. Also you can''t just hide you have to be in public.


    "Alright and if I win, you need to agree with everything I say for an entire day," Mu thought to the voice while imagining that glorious day.


    ;)Alright it''s a bet.


    "A real one this time," Mu thought to the voice.


    Two hours later Mu arrived at Clemens'' Thiefdom Capital.


    ;)Your definitely teleporting there is no way you walked 260 kilometers in two hours.


    "I mean really..what even is distance right like who knows," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)What?


    "I''m just saying.." However Mu was interrupted by a ragged figure running at him screaming.


    "SOCKS GIVE ME YOUR SOCKS!" The figure then tried to tackle Mu to the ground.


    Mu just moved out of the way as the figure actually wasn''t that fast.


    The figure however wasn''t deterred as it just came at Mu even harder screaming even louder," GIVE ME THEM WARRMIES FOR MY FEETIES!"


    Mu evaded again and said,"Ok you can have my goddamn socks."


    The figure suddenly stopped and reached out its hand.


    As Mu was trying to take off his socks he felt a club hit the back of his head and he started fading in and out of consciousness.


    Before he fully succumbed to the darkness Mu heard a voice say,"Welcome to the city kid all your shits mine now."

 49 Naked/The Hole

    Mu woke up an unknown amount of time later staring up at the night sky.


    He felt something rough poking his back and then a sudden coldness.


    When Mu got the nerve he looked down and was shocked not by what he saw but by what he didn''t see.


    He had no clothes on..his shirt was gone, pants gone, socks gone, shoes gone, and most importantly underwear...gone.


    ;)Haha...you could always form new ones..except that would mean you lose the bet.


    "Shut the fuck up! I probably have another pair in my pocket dimension," Mu thought to the voice while shivering.


    ;)Ahhh but wouldn''t that be using your power.


    "What..no I''m just using an item," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Alright but it''s just gonna make you more depressed.


    Mu rolled his eyes at the voice and entered into his pocket dimension anyways.


    Mu looked around for the things he believed he put in here but all he could see was the grey nothingness he had made this place to be.


    ;)YOU FORGOT TO PUT SHIT IN HERE!


    While the abyss was laughing at Mu, he just sighed and came to the realization that,"At least I can sleep in here."


    ;)Yea but you''ll still be naked the next morning.


    Mu didn''t hear the voice cause he had curled up into a ball and was humming "Soul Fight" by "The Revivalists".


    Mu woke up in that grey void still naked and very much afraid not only of losing the bet but also for a specific part of his anatomy.


    Mu left the pocket dimension and walked into the Capital of Alben''s Thiefdom.


    ;)With his hands cupped around his member thinking that would protect it against the elements.


    (With the abyss being an overwhelming asshole today he will now be shut from further dialogue for the rest of the chapter)


    ;)What..this is bullshit


    (Did I stutter)


    ;)*Sigh*..No


    Mu was walking around the city avoiding anybody and everybody while thinking about a solution to his problem.


    After thinking for a while Mu had finally formulated a plan.


    Walking up to a ruined building Mu pulled out a fist sized rock that he believed he could do some damage with.


    "Man I wish I hadn''t burned my cane," Mu thought, although he realized it would have most likely been stolen by the sock bandits.


    Mu kept stalking around the city until he found somebody in pants.


    This was normally a hard find as the pants market was very monopolized and most of them were owned by one man.


    However, *Insert Gender Here* Luck smiled down on Mu that day because he found a pants wearer in about 20 minutes.


    Mu jumped down behind the guy and yelled at him,"STOP! I have a rock and I''m not afraid to use it!"


    The man turned around while clicking his tongue and said,"Well I gotta say.."


    But he stopped mid sentence when he saw Mu.


    A look of disappointment washed over the guys face before he said," Goddamnit another nude...honestly you guys are all the same."


    Mu looked confused while 5 guys appeared around him the pants wearer sighed before saying," You obviously have nothing to offer me so I''m just gonna have my guys beat you up and throw you in the hole."


    Before Mu could say anything all five of the guys rushed at him.


    They obviously won but one good thing did come out of this. Mu was able to copy some of their fighting techniques.


    But a beaten and battered Mu couldn''t fight right now so he allowed the goons to carry him to the hole.


    All the while regretting making that bet with the abyss.


    ;)Hey your not gonna nerf Mu are you?


    (Didn''t I say no more dialogue..and no I love Mu being overpowered as shit i just thought this would be fun. So don''t worry those goons will get their asses kicked within at most 2 chapters)


    ;)Alright..good.

 50 34 Points/Cannibal Sui

    ;)Miss me?


    "Oh..hey voice where have you been why didn''t you warn me about the scam?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)I was muted for being an asshole.


    "Huh..well that kinda makes me feel better," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)I''m sure it does.


    "So do you know what''s going on?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)Yeah your being carried by some goons to a place called the hole and you got your ass kicked.


    "Well not in that order but yea..wait do you know anything about this place?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)No I don''t but if I had to guess it would be a hole where they put people they don''t like.


    "So it''s a prison?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)Why don''t you ask these guys.


    "Alright I mean what''s the worst that could happen," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)They kick your ass again.


    Mu was already conversing with the goons however so he didn''t hear the abyss.


    "So what is the hole?" Mu asked the goons.


    The goon holding his left leg looked up and said," It''s a hole where we put people we don''t like."


    "So is it an actual hole?" Mu asked the goons.


    The goon holding his right leg smiled and said," Yeah but don''t worry it won''t be deep enough to kill you."


    Mu looked shocked and asked,"What do you mean by that?"


    The goon holding his left arm looked up and asked,"Why do you think all of us came to escort one person?"


    Before Mu could answer the goon holding his right arm said,"Because it''s really fun to throw people in it..oh here we are."


    Before Mu could register what was going on he had been thrown and instead of hitting the ground he just kept falling.


    The last thing he heard from the goons was,"That was a shit throw 34 points."


    Mu didn''t know how long he fell but when he landed he didn''t feel anything break but all the air rushed out of him and he was left dazed.


    The first thing that hit Mu was the smell even before he turned around to see what he was on he nearly threw up.


    As he turned around the first thing he saw was a caved in torso and then lifeless eyes.


    "Oh god it''s a body!" Mu screamed to the air.


    ;)Calm down its not like you haven''t seen a dead body.


    "Yea but I''ve never been this close to one," Mu thought to the voice as he stumbled away from the body.


    As he backed up he tripped and rolled down a small "hill" when he hit the ground he looked up and noticed the "hill" was made of dead bodies.


    "Holy shit!" Mu screamed.


    ;)We might wanna leave.


    "Yea,"Mu thought to the voice.


    Before he could run away though Mu heard a voice behind him yell,"Why are you touching our supply!"


    Mu looked in the direction of the voice and saw a crazy looking man in surprisingly good clothing pointing a bone spike at him.


    Mu immediately put two and two together to figure out that the bodies were his supply and this man was most likely a cannibal.


    Mu started to bolt until he realized there were people all around him.


    The crazy man, who was most likely the leader, licked his lips and said," The prey just comes to us now boys..time to hunt."


    The entire group of about fifteen people started running at Mu.


    The techniques Mu learned from his beating immediately kicked in and as the fight continued they got better and better.


    (What I mean by this is that he got more used to using the techniques he remembered)


    When it finally came down to just Mu and the lead cannibal the crazy man came at Mu swinging his bone spike.


    Mu got hit a few times before he learned the leaders pattern and from there it was easy to disarm him and shove the spike through his skull.


    ;)Goddamn Mu.


    "Yea..I''m done with this shit I''m gonna get out of here and probably just leave." Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)I told you this was a bullshit kingdom...but does this mean I won.


    "No I haven''t left Ezriels Thiefdom yet and I haven''t used my power so who knows what could happen," Mu thought to the voice.


    Mu will never admit to what he did next but he stripped the cannibal leader of his clothing and started wearing it.


    It was a bluish suit that was torn in most places.


    The abyss nicknamed it "Cannibal Suit" in honor of the man who most likely stole it from another dead body.

 51 Loop Hole/Revenge

    It was nighttime in the hole and Mu was watching the other people while sitting in his section.


    The hole wasn''t that big only about 100 meters from one side to the other.


    In fact the biggest section of the hole was held by the cannibals Mu had killed.


    They had the most people, the best structure, and technically the most food out of any of the other groups.


    Mu found all this out because after he killed the cannibals all the other groups came to pay him tribute and thanks.


    One such group named"The Line-Keepers" taught Mu about the social structure of the hole and the power of the bone spike he held.


    FACTIONS IN THE HOLE


    -The Cannibals-Dead


    -The Dirt Constructors-Build things out of dirt if payed


    -The Merchants-Have the only known way out of the hole monopolized.


    -The Growers-Farmers who grow food to sell to The Merchants or to other factions if payed


    -The Strong-The smallest faction but not the weakest they protect the growers, usually ex-fighters or mercenaries


    -The Line-Keepers-They live in the middle of the hole and keep the peace between the factions


    -The Singles-People who can''t or don''t want to be in any of the other factions named above


    BONE SPIKE DESCRIPTION


    The only weapon in the hole, held by whoever is the strongest in the hole at that time


    After all of this was explained to Mu all it did was give him more questions however all the factions had already left so he couldn''t ask them.


    Mu was about to enter into his pocket dimension when he suddenly had a realization.


    "Would you say this is kind of another kingdom," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Yea I guess it kinda is.


    "So if this is another kingdom and I''m holding the item that signifies the strongest person meaning that person would be king," Mu thought to the voice while starting to smile.


    ;)I don''t like where this is going.


    "Then technically I''m the king meaning I win the bet!" Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)No your not the king of the Thiefdom your the king of this hole meaning the bets still going.


    "No you said and I quote,"If I win, and you can''t become king with nothing other than photographic memory." And I have become a king so I win...its over," Mu thought to the voice while crying tears of joy.


    ;)Goddamnit.. yea I guess you do win what was your reward.


    "You have to agree with everything I say for an entire day," Mu thought to the voice while smiling.


    Since the bet was over Mu was allowed to use his power again so he gave himself flight and left the hole and it''s entire intricate, literally took me hours to make, plot.


    ;) So what are you gonna do now that you have your powers back?


    "First I''m gonna fuck with you and then I''m gonna go get some revenge," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Of course you are.


    In another part of the city five goons were currently getting their asses kicked by a hooded figure.


    The figure was saying," I''m sorry I said 1-2 chapters and I don''t know how to work Mu in over here so..sorry."


    That figure was The Author keeping his promises.

 52 Yes..They Are/Fucking Warlocks

    ;)So are you ever actually going to be a thief?


    "No I think I''m gonna retire from that job," Mu thought to the voice as he was floating above the city.


    ;)What do you mean retire you''ve never actually done anything..so actually your just quitting.


    "No I''m not," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Yea you ar..


    Mu interrupted the abyss and said,"Hey! Remember the bet."


    ;)...No your not quitting your retiring because you''ve had such an amazing career.


    "Was that sarcasm? Alright two can play at this game," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)What are you going to do?


    "You know I''ve always wondered but you don''t believe in human rights do you?" Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)*Sigh* No I don''t.


    "You think your an idiot for always saying Sigh don''t you?" Mu thought to the voice while smiling.


    ;)Yes I do.


    "You probably think toes are hot don''t you." Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Yea I do.


    "These are your true and honest feelings aren''t they," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Yes..they are.


    "Good well I''ll ask you some more questions later, but right now I gotta see what place is up next," Mu thought to the voice as he pulled out his map.


    ;)The Oligarchy of Magic.


    "The fucks an Oligarchy?" Mu thought to the voice as he looked at it.


    ;)It''s when a country is ruled by a bunch of people, and if I had to guess I would say these people most likely practice magic.


    "Like fireballs and stuff..sounds boring as fuck," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Boring..dude that''s a burning ball of fire you can throw at someone to burn them.


    "Yea and..flamethrower does the same shit, also you have to agree with me," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Ok sure whatever just promise me one thing.


    "What?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)Learn any magic you want just don''t become a warlock.


    "The fuck is that?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)Their these punk ass bitches who pimp themselves out to spirits and demons for some power..and they''re creepy as hell.


    "Alright that sounds like a bitch way to do magic so I won''t become one of those," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;) Thank you...Fucking Warlocks creeping me the fuck out.


    In the Oligarchy of Mages a group of people all wearing red hoods and black robes gathered around a table in a basement.


    One of the members said,"We have called this meeting to address two issues. One we need new clothing these garment are very old and honestly too big all in favor say "I" ."


    All the members except one said "I" he or she stood up and said," I actually kinda like the color pattern so I was wondering if that was going to stay the same before I cast my vote."


    The first member who spook shook their head and said," No we are thinking more of a green and black color pattern on our new outfits this was talked about yesterday where were you?"


    The member standing up answered saying,"Oh my mom fell down the stairs so I couldn''t be here yesterday but I''m alright with green and black so I say "I"."


    The member then sat down and the first one started speaking again,"The second issue is that our research and development teams have finally found a way to reach the "Great One"."


    All the member then put their hands together and yelled,"All Hail The "Great One"!"


    Then suddenly a banging was heard above them and a woman''s voice shouted,"Quite down Donny or else none of your friends will be able to come over again!"


    The First member to speak, who''s name is Donny, put his hands on his face and then yelled,"Shut up mom I''m gonna take over the world!"


    All the members could hear a faint noice of Donny''s mom saying,"What did I do wrong raising that boy I swear no respectful bone in his body."

 53 Color Blind/Illusion Mage

    Mu had entered the Oligarchy of Magic about 2 hours ago and the entire time he had been walking up.


    ;)How big is this fucking hill.


    "I don''t think it''s a hill it might be a mountain," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)So a big hill...why don''t you just fly over it.


    "Well a hill is more like a small mountain but whatever, and your right I''ll just fly over," Mu thought to the voice as he gave himself flight.


    Mu rose above the trees surrounding him and noticed that this mountain had no top.


    Not just a non-visible hiding behind clouds kinda no top, but literally no top it just kept going.


    "This isn''t natural right?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)I mean it could be.


    "How?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)Magic.


    "Oh yea cause that explains it," Mu thought to the voice rolling his eyes.


    ;)No really just trust me..give yourself magic immunity or something and I swear everything will make sense.


    "Alright...what''s the worst that could happen," Mu thought to the voice as he gave himself magic immunity.


    Suddenly the entire mountain disappeared and in its place a giant city appeared.


    The first thing Mu noticed were eight giant poles each showing a different color and they were surrounded by buildings of that same color.


    The colors went clockwise from the top Red,Green,Black,"Nothing",Blue,Brown,White,Gold.


    In the center was a giant Colosseum which still had the color separations.


    Their were people too also wearing the different colors and always staying in their respective colors area.


    ;)Their divided by their schools of magic.


    "How the hell do you know that?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)Because I''m not an idiot.


    Mu was about to respond but was interrupted when he noticed a bunch of robe wearing people were flying towards him.


    An old man in a blue robe who was sitting on a cloud yelled at Mu," Who are you and how did you break the Deity-level illusion spell!"


    Mu was shocked by the people and blurted out the first thing that came to his mind," I''m Mu Sic and I''m color-blind!"


    The old man looked stunned and asked,"What?"


    "I''m Mu Sic and I''m color-blind," Mu said sounding meal on the last part.


    The old man shook his head before saying,"That''s Great now how did you break the illusion spell, I know that magic is useless but it was still a strong spell."


    ;)Just say your a traveling illusion mage..fucking color blind what are you thinking.


    Mu didn''t respond to the voice but he did like the idea of being an illusion mage so he decided to use this excuse.


    "Sorry about that earlier you caught me off guard I''m Mu Sic and I''m a traveling illusion mage," Mu said to the old man.


    The old man thought for a bit before asking," That still does t explain how you broke the spell."


    "Oh that baby work shit can''t even make me eat frog..from well..swan meat." Mu said stuttering on the last bit as he tried to piece together a saying about how easy it was.


    Despite Mu''s ramblings the old man didn''t believe him and told him,"Oh well if your that good then you wouldn''t mind doing something to prove it would you."


    (It must be known that the reason this man wasn''t afraid of Mu was because he himself was the Water Archmage so he could cast and destroy deity-level magic as well)


    ;)You could have explained that later


    (I didn''t want too)


    Mu immediately perked up after the old man asked to see a demonstration.


    He gave himself the ability Reality Bender and then snapped his finger altering the reality around the old man to be complete and endless darkness.


    He also made the time difference 1 second to 1 year and kept the old man in their for 10 seconds.


    Needless to say once the old man came out he broke down and started crying and he was terrified of Mu.


    "Damn illusion magic is fun," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Yea..I..I guess.

 54 Illusion Mage Robes/It Really Is

    Since Mu told the guards he was an illusion mage they were escorting him over to the illusion section of the city.


    Mu had to switch guards every time he passed from one color to another.


    "Are they all racist?" Mu asked the voice while being transported between the red color and the green color.


    ;)What...no they''re just separating themselves from people with a different color than..wait no not color..magic people with different magic from them.


    "So..magicism," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Yea...sure.


    Mu kept being transported between colors until he reached the "Nothing" section were he was led down the road to the center of town while a wall of what looked to be nude people cheered for him.


    Mu was stopped in front of a nude old man who seemed to be commanding a lot of respect from the people around him.


    The nude old man walked up to Mu and said," Hello I am, Well Wayne Hung my friends call me Well Hung and I welcome you to the illusion sector."


    A roaring cheer broke out from the crowd of nudist as Mu shook Well Hungs hand.


    "G..glad to be here," Mu stuttered out as he wiped his hand on his pants.


    Well Hung smiled before putting his arm over Mu and saying," Well we''re glad to have you especially after we heard what you did to the water archmage, showed that prick a thing or two didn''t ya."


    Well Hung started leading Mu to the biggest house in the sector and Mu felt something on his neck.


    It felt almost like cloth but that was impossible Well Hung was naked.


    So Mu asked him,"Excuse me Sir, but why is everyone nude?"


    Well Hung looked at Mu for a few seconds before laughing and saying," You..haha.. think we''re naked. No we''re wearing our color...clear."


    "Did..did he just say clear," Mu thought to the voice stunned.


    ;)Haha Yea, and by the looks of it that''s standard issue so...good luck.


    Mu was about to run before he realized that he can change his body in anyway he wants.


    So instead of being fearful he was actually a bit excited.


    He was led into the big house and into a room which seemed prepared for a very special guest.


    Or at least that was what he was told but he couldn''t see any of the things as they were all in the illusion schools color of clear.


    "Goddamn this really is the worst school isn''t it," Mu thought to the voice.

 55 Invitation/Body Modifications

    After Mu found his invisible bed he heard a knock on the door and had to go answer it.


    On the other side of the door was a woman clutching a letter tightly in her hands.


    She pushed it into Mu''s chest and then ran off.


    ;)Oh God please no.


    "W..what was that," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)An assassin...that letter is probably poisoned so throw it away immediately.


    "No I don''t think it was..I..I think that girl likes me," Mu thought to the voice while smiling.


    ;)No..no she doesn''t and you don''t want her to, trust me that is a weakness you don''t want to have.


    "How can you call love a weakness you cold hearted bastard," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)It''s not cold hearted I''m being rational if you start seeing her then every two minutes she''s gonna be kidnapped.


    "Who would do that to her?" Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Shit I don''t know but it just happens...trust me.


    "Whatever...let''s just see what the letter says," Mu thought to the voice as he ripped open the letter.


    Dear Mu,


    I am positively infatuated with you and would like to invite you to dinner with my family. If you should accept come to 122 Smiths Street.


    Sincerely,


    Well Wayne Hung


    ;)Oh thank god she was a messenger.


    "B..but why," Mu fell back onto his bed while all his future dates, family photos, and houses with the messenger faded away.


    ;)Yeah that sucks man but hey..this is a lot better than if it actually was a love letter.


    Mu laid on his bed for a bit until he eventually got over it muttering,"Fucking bitch."


    ;)So where are your robes?


    "Probably in an invisible closet," Mu said while walking around his room when suddenly he ran into something.


    Mu felt around it and found a knob which he pulled.


    Inside were what seemed to be empty floating hangers.


    ;)Huh I guess they are.


    "I''m so done with this shit," Mu thought to the voice as he pulled out what felt like a robe.


    As he was trying to find the holes on the invisible "Piece of Shit", as Mu calls it, he was thinking about what modifications he wanted.


    "Steel arms, or water torso?"Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)What why would you want either...I would go for mist or shadow.


    "Yea well you don''t have a body so...fuck you," Mu thought to the voice as he realized how cool those sounded.


    After two hours of debating Mu and the abyss came up with the mind bending reality bending perfect body.


    Mu would just...wear clothes underneath the robe.

 56 Past It/Do Candles Produce This Much Ligh

    ;)Somethings weird


    "What?" Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)I feel like 3 days 4 hours and 13 minutes have passed but it''s only been like two hours right.


    "Yea it has but that''s not important. Look at this checkers board I made out of a napkin and ink," Mu thought to the voice while holding up a napkin with a messy grid on it.


    ;)That''s...you need help.


    "...no I don''t," Mu thought to the voice putting his checkerboard down.


    ;)So are we gonna go to that dinner or not?


    "Do you know where 122 Smiths Street is?" Mu asked the voice right back.


    ;)Well...no but your map probably does I mean it''s a pretty convenient plot dev...I mean tool.


    "Why would my map of "Undisclosed Length" be able to show the streets of this city," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Just trust me


    "You''ve been saying that a lot," Mu thought to the voice before bringing out his map and finding the city.


    He was shocked when he saw that he could see every road, alley, house, and shop displayed before him.


    "Was that old man a fucking wizard?" Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Don''t try to explain it...just accept it.


    "Alright...well yea I guess I''ll go no reason not to now," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)So them being nude isn''t a reason?


    "Ehh I''ve gotten past it," Mu thought to the voice while shrugging his shoulders.


    After dressing up in his best clothes and donning his invisible cloak Mu walked towards the dining hall.


    122 Smiths Street was actually the house Mu was already in but Well Hung decided to still put his address on the invitation for some reason.


    ;)Probably just a mass sent card where all they do is change the name.


    "Probably," Mu thought to the voice as he left his room.


    The house was so big Mu had to ask for directions from some of the servants to get there.


    When he walked in light just blasted his eyes like a flash bang,"Oh Shit!" Mu screamed falling backwards.


    Everyone in the room whose eyes had adjusted to the brightness looked at Mu with shock/disgust.


    Mainly because they''re all assholes but also because Mu just crashed their party.


    As Mu got up he noticed their looks immediately thinking,"Who are you to judge me you bunch of nudist."


    Once Mu adjusted to the light he decided to check out what was producing it.


    He gave himself Light Immunity and looked up.


    All the while the abyss was saying.


    ;)Why don''t you call it light elimination.


    Or


    ;)Shit name shit name shit name...


    However Mu didn''t listen and kept the perfectly fine name and noticed that the things producing all this light were...candles.


    "Candles?" Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)That''s not a question, and yea they''re probably magic.


    "The tone was questioning, and I''m gonna check," Mu thought to the voice.


    Mu proceeded to give himself Magic Identifying Eyes of The Crystal King.


    ...(A/N the abyss named that one)


    "They...they''re just candles," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)What?


    "They.are.just.candles," Mu thought to the voice sounding out every word.


    ;)Since when have candles made this much light?

 57 Well Hung/Irony...Maybe

    Mu has been walking around the dining hall for about 20 minutes looking for Well Hung in the sea of nude people.


    Many things occurred in that 20 minute-ish time including your standard fights, deaths, and entire family lineages being destroyed.


    However they were all nude so...progress?


    Mu finally found Well Hung in the bathroom hyperventilating.


    "Hey man are you alright?" Mu asked Well Hung.


    Well Hung looked up at Mu with relief in his eyes and said,"Too be honest...no I''m not. I''ve never had this many people in my house Mu and I gotta speak to them."


    "But aren''t you like the councilman that represents the illusion sector?" Mu asked Well Hung shocked.


    Well Hung looked up at the ceiling ashamed," Well yea but the illusion sector has always been the worst. So I never actually had to do anything, but now that your here and they think we got a shot everybody is looking at me."


    "Shot at what Well Hung?" Mu asked.


    Well Hung looked Mu straight in the eyes and said," The Magic Talent Show that''s held once a year we''ve never won but now people have hope and I got fear. I''ve never let anyone down before Mu and...well I don''t know what to do."


    Mu was confused but he shook his head and steeled his eyes and said to Well Hung," You know what."


    "What," Well Hung said looking back at the floor.


    "It doesn''t matter...because your well hung, Well Hung," Mu said.


    Well Hung looked up shocked and then looked down and when he raised his head again he had a wide smile across his face.


    "You know what Mu I am well hung," Well Hung said as he stood up.


    He then looked at the ceiling and screamed,"I''M WELL HUNG!"


    Well Hung then confidently walked out of the bathroom but before he closed the door he turned around and told Mu,"Thank you for reminding me of how well hung I am."


    Before Mu could follow Well Hung the abyss stopped him and said.


    ;)I got a bad feeling.


    "About what?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)I''m drawing parallels to this competition and the last one.


    "What in the Dragon something kingdom?" Mu asked to the voice.


    ;)Yea I''m thinking about that old man and comparing him to Well Hung, and I hate to say it but I think We''ll Hung is gonna die.


    "So what...I''ll just revive him also quit trying to bring up suspense or tension or whatever the fuck your doing," Mu thought to the voice as he walked out of the bathroom.


    ;)Well I guess I am just overthinking it.


    The next place Mu found Well Hung was in a group of people next to a woman who seemed to be 17-18 years old.


    However her age was t what drew Mu''s eye to her no the reason he was looking at her is because she had clothes on.


    They were very skimpy and showed a lot of skin but they were definitely clothes.


    Mu walked up finally happy to have met a regular person...so much so that he couldn''t take his eyes off of her.


    Well Hung noticed Mu and immediately waved him over.


    The crowd around Well Hung dispersed looking at Mu with fear and disgust as they walked away.


    Mu noticed these looks like he noticed every other one and decided to ask Well Hung about it.


    "Oh they don''t like how your wearing clothes after you reached adulthood. In our culture that shows disrespect,shame, and many other horrible things," Well Hung explained.


    "That''s ironic...I think," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Yea Yea...I think.


    (A/N Is it?)

 58 Adulthood?/How Old Is Mu

    As the party went on and Well Hung did his speech and people came and went Mu continued talking to Well Hung''s daughter.


    Her name is Clit Oris Hung and her and Mu hit it off right away.


    As it turns out they both liked the same things like; doing nothing, and long walks on the beach.


    It was nearing the end of the party and Clit Oris brought Mu over to a secluded corner in the dining hall to talk.


    "I had a great time talking to you Mu and...I was wondering if you would like to go out with me tomorrow around the city," Clit Oris said as she leaned into him.


    ;)Say No.


    "What...why the fuck would I do that I like being around her and it might lead somewhere," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)How old is she?


    "She''s reached adulthood," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)That''s not a number Mu.


    "Well I don''t see what it will change but...alright I''ll ask her," Mu thought to the voice.


    "I would love to do that but I am curious...how old are you today," Mu said to Clit Oris as he wrapped his arms around her.


    Clit Oris giggled before saying,"You should know never to ask a woman her age Mu...but since it''s you I''ll tell you that I''m turning sixteen."


    Mu froze before patting Clit Oris on the back and saying," See you tomorrow...friend."


    Then Mu turned around and bolted Clit Oris yelled for him to stop but Mu just plunged his ears and kept running.


    The only time that he slowed down was to ask for directions to his room but even then he was still speed walking.


    When he reached his room he shut the door and the enchanted it with Immovability to make sure nobody came in.


    All the while saying," No. No. No. No��"


    He started pacing still saying it until he thought of something and asked the voice," How old am I?"


    ;)Ummm...about a millennium or two.


    "Ok good cause if I just did that and I was still sixteen that would suck," Mu thought to the voice sighing.


    ;)Yea...but do you really age in the abyss?


    "Well...Shit!" Mu thought as he tried to fall back onto his bed but missed and hit the floor instead.


    Knocking him out.


    (A/N Hi... gonna be honest with you I''m just trying to get over 400 words with this so ummm have a good day or night...I don''t know.)

 59 Headache/Alright Dad

    Hi I''m Mu Sic and around me is��


    "Ahhhh!" Mu screamed as he woke up.


    ;)What the fuck! Why are you screaming?


    "I..I was having a nightmare about starting this shit over again," Mu thought to the voice as he felt a headache.


    ;)It hasn''t been that bad.


    "Yea whatever, fuck this headache. Does getting knocked out give you headaches?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)Probably not, but nightmares sure do. Don''t worry it will be gone in like six seconds.


    "That doesn''t sound right, and...how?" Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Don''t question it three...two...one...and it''s gone.


    Mu suddenly felt the pain rocking his world disappear completely for no reason.


    "How did you know that��"Mu was thinking to the voice before he was interrupted by a knock at the door.


    ;)Right on time, we got a lot of shit to do today Mu, big stuff, so eat a granola bar and get out there.


    "There''s no granola bars here," Mu thought to the voice as he walked towards the door.


    ;)Figure of speech, and have you eaten anything in like five weeks.


    "I ate at the party last night," Mu thought to the voice as he opened the door.


    ;)Well that wasn''t in the script...


    "What script��" Mu was about to ask the voice before he saw who was outside his door.


    It was Clit Oris standing awkwardly in front of him.


    She was the one to break the ice first saying," I''m here to give you the tour I promised."


    Mu suddenly came back to reality and stuttered saying," Y..yea ummm just let me change."


    Mu then shut the door as softly as he could before walking backwards stunned and tripping onto his bed.


    ;)Fuck fuck fucking shitty ass love interest.


    "What...you think she likes me," Mu thought to the voice while smiling.


    ;)Hey Mu remember she''s underage right. So you can''t morally do anything right.


    "Well...I''m kinda underage too so��" Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)You humans disgust me with your level of perversion.


    "Alright I''m not gonna do anything but there''s nothing wrong with me being friends with her," Mu thought to the voice as he changed his clothes.


    ;)I''m sure that''s how she sees it to.


    "Fuck you man I just wanna have some fun...and get a tour around the city," Mu thought to the voice as he walked back towards the door.


    ;)Now you listen here young sir you better be back by 9:00 sharp.


    "Alright dad," Mu thought you the voice as he walked out the door.


    ;)Oh god I did sound old.

 60 Awkward Tour/If Your A Mage Be A Mage

    "Are you uhh ready to go," Clit Oris said as Mu opened the door in his new clothes.


    Right before Mu answered her he realized that she was now nude.


    Which is a good thing...probably. Since it means he didn''t immediately look at her...tits.


    "Umm Uhh Yea I''m ready to go," Mu said to Clit Oris after a few seconds.


    Clit Oris smiled before turning around and saying,"Follow me then."


    They spent a few hours visiting all the important places in the sector.


    Clit Oris and Mu talked pretty easily considering the event that had happened only a day before.


    Whenever the conversation reached a point where Mu was comfortable talking to Clit Oris.


    His mind would wander to non-friend activities.


    This would result in his mind being assaulted with a screaming abyss saying.


    ;)She''s Sixteen!


    Or


    ;)You Make Me Sick!


    Mu didn''t respond to these but they would always straighten out his thoughts.


    This led to Mu feeling bad the entire tour and hoping for it to end soon so that he can go crawl into a hole and die.


    Luckily for Mu, Clit Oris announced that the next place they would be going was the last.


    She said it was the training hall and it was located in the Northern part of town.


    It looked like a miniature version of the giant colosseum in the center of the city.


    The inside actually seemed bigger than the outside which most likely had to do with the whole illusion magic thing.


    But that wasn''t what Mu noticed first instead that would be the hundreds of people learning how to fight.


    But they weren''t learning how to fight with magic but instead their bodies.


    This confused Mu since he thought everyone here were mages.


    So he decided to ask Clit Oris," Hey they''re all mages right, so why are they learning to fight without magic?"


    Clit Oris laughed before noticing that Mu was completely serious so she said,"Oh...well they''re gonna run out of magic at some point so we teach them how to fight without it."


    Mu thought for a bit before saying,"Then teach them how to conserve their magic better, use as little as they have to, or make their amount bigger."


    Clit Oris was a bit perplexed before saying,"Even then those are only temporary fixes they''re still gonna run out at some point."


    Mu got a bit mad at this and said,"Maybe so, but they''re never going to beat a warrior or a bear with this. They''ll have to use magic so just teach them magic."


    Clit Oris got flustered by Mu''s intensity and stuttered,"I..I don''t make the curriculum."


    Mu noticed how scared he was making Clit Oris so he calmed down and said,"I never said you did, but you gotta agree this stuff is fucking stupid."


    "EXCUSE ME!" A voice shouted out from the from the right of Mu.

 61 Keep It In The Last Chapter/Jumping To Conclusions

    "How did you "Call it" you said people would kidnap her this guys just being a dick," Mu thought to the voice carrying on a conversation that started last chapter.


    ;)Yea it starts with this guy being a dick and then when you kick his ass a few times he then kidnaps her.


    "That won''t happen," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Oh really...how do you know?


    "Because...I''m not gonna beat the guy up," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)What...no you have to beat the guy up he''s being a dick.


    "No I don''t, I''ll just leave," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Wha..what no you..you can''t just leave. Well I mean you can but...please don''t.


    "Then what do you propose I do," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Well...you have a problem with his teaching technique right.


    "Yea," Mu thought to the voice while wondering where it was going with this.


    ;)So what if you take half of the students to teach and he takes half of the students to teach and then they fight.


    "Why would the students agree to this," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Because your a mysterious master and they never get those in the illusion magic school.


    "That can''t be right," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Trust me it is.


    "Alright I guess this can work," Mu thought to the voice.


    Then Mu thought of something else and asked the abyss,"Hey how long have we been talking for?"


    ;)I think time stops whenever we talk...unless the conversation gets to met��


    But the abyss was interrupted by the man who started it all screaming," What say You!"


    Mu came back to the real world and started thinking on what to say.


    What he came up with was this,"I don''t like your teaching technique."


    The man looked stunned and said,"I...I''m not the teacher."


    Mu was shocked after he heard this and said," Then who the fuck is."


    Just then a tiny squeaky voice screamed from the center of the training grounds,"I AM!"


    (A/N Hey...again I''m trying to get to 400 words again so uhhh...I got a story to tell.


    I was reading a book umm and the main character had a harem and one of the woman on it was named Mu. So uhh that was painful to read. By the way you can just skip past this but uhh thanks for reading it. Ohh yea and we hit 30,000 views so that''s cool.Uhhh see ya.)


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 62 Real Original/Professor...Professor...Professor

    Mu looked over towards the sound of the voice and noticed a child standing on a podium.


    ;)Real fucking original.


    "What?" Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Nothing, but you should probably know that the "child" over there is probably in her 80''s.


    "Oh ok thanks for the information," Mu thought to the voice.


    Mu looked back towards the podium only to see that the "child" had disappeared.


    "Where the fu��" Mu was thinking but was interrupted when the "child" popped up right in front of him.


    "Hi I''m Professor Ita, why are you disturbing my class?" The "child" asked Mu.


    Mu was stunned for a bit before saying," Hi Yea I''m Professor Mu, and I have a problem with your curriculum."


    ;)Pulling out the big words.


    "It''s not...but ok," Professor Mu thought to the voice.


    Professor Ita coughed into her hand to get Professor Mu''s attention.


    Mu refocused on the Professor and asked,"What is it?"


    "I asked what was your problem,"Professor Ita said to Professor Mu.


    "Well my problem is how dumb it is that mages are learning to fight instead of learning magic," Professor Mu said to Professor Ita.


    "Well obviously they have to learn how to fight they will run out of mana eventually," Professor Ita said to Professor Mu.


    "Then teach them how to conserve their mana better or make their mana pool bigger. They should be focusing on what they are good at...Magic," Professor Mu said to Professor Ita.


    "Why can''t they do both," Professor Ita said to Professor Mu.


    "Because doing everything makes you good at nothing. I mean really, you don''t see a carpenter learning how to be a blacksmith do you," Professor Mu said to Professor Ita.


    "You know what if your so confident in your teachings how about we duel," Professor Ita said to Professor Mu since she was getting kind of angry.


    "Now what would that solve fellow Professor," Professor Mu said to Professor Ita.


    "Then what do you propose we do Professor Mu?" Professor Ita asked Professor Mu.


    "Well...how about each of us take a different half of the rookies, teach them for about two hours and then have them fight. This will show which way of teaching is better." Professor Mu proposed to Professor Ita.


    Professor Ita thought for a bit before accepting the proposal and saying," You get the right side I get the left."


    ;)Hey I just looked up the definition of Professor and Mu''s more of a teacher than a professor since he''s not in a college.


    (A/N That''s great)


    ;)Wait no I don''t think your actually listening to my complaint.


    (A/N You are a valued member of my team)


    ;)What?


    (A/N What?)


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 63 Mu’s Teachings/A Crack

    Professor Ita walked back to her podium and relayed the deal her and Mu had come to.


    This caused a few of the students to shout in anger since they didn''t want to fight and instead just wanted to continue learning.


    These complaints fell on deaf ears however as Professor Ita split the room into two teams of 200.


    ;)Huh there is a even number of students...how convenient.


    "Yea they must do that for...well I don''t know," Mu thought to the voice as he walked over to the right side of the training hall.


    All the people on Mu''s side at least seemed happy since they were going to be learning from the mysterious master.


    While the people on Professor Ita''s side kept trying to sneak over.


    ;)So what are you going to teach them.


    "The most important lesson there is," Mu thought to the voice as he smiled looking out over his students.


    After everything got settled down from the transition all of the right side looked at Mu in complete silence.


    This is what Mu taught them.


    MU''S TEACHINGS


    1.Don''t be a bitch!


    2.Don''t be a bitch!


    3.Don''t be a bitch!


    4.Get at least 8 hours of sleep every night!


    ;)MU!


    "What?" Mu thought to the voice after spending his last 30 minutes talking about the values of getting enough sleep.


    ;)What the fuck was that!


    "Me teaching them the most important lesson of their lives," Mu thought to the voice as he looked over his shocked students.


    ;)You didn''t teach them shit.


    "Yes I did, I taught them not to be a bitch and how important sleeping is," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)That won''t do shi��


    But the abyss was interrupted as one of the students started yelling,"THIS POWER!"


    The students body then starting overflowing with so much mana that you could smell it in the air.


    This was followed by all the other students experiencing the same event.


    ;)What the hell happened.


    "I''m just that good a teacher," Mu thought to the voice as he looked out at all the students who were looking at him in reverence.


    ;)...You fucking cheated didn''t you.


    "What! No I...well I might have given them god like reserves of mana but I didn''t cheat," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)I mean yea you technically didn''t, but that doesn''t make this alright.


    "Well I''m not saying it''s alright am I," Mu thought to the voice as he imagined his upcoming win.


    ;)But in some way doesn''t this kinda undermine your argument.


    "No all I did was give them bigger mana reserves," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)I guess.


    The fight happened and obviously Mu won in fact it was so one sided that it''s not even worth describing.


    ;)No your just lazy.


    (A/N Maybe but it was boring so...)


    ;)Yea fuck it, cut the fight that''s been fucking teased for like 3 chapters.


    (A/N I knew you would understand)


    The only interesting thing that really happened was Mu stumbling upon a crack in the air.


    It wasn''t big but it was definitely there and as Mu got closer to it the crack disappeared.


    He just explained it away as a crack in the training halls illusion spell but the abyss knew that this...was foreshadowing.


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 64 Fake Love/Mu’s Nightmare

    After Mu and Clit Oris left the training hall they walked back to Well Hung''s mansion in silence.


    When they walked in Clit Oris had her head down in what seemed to be shame.


    Well Hung was waiting on them with eyes that screamed "What the fuck are you doing here."


    Mu was weirded out by these stares and got curious so before he went to bed he made an invisible clone to follow them around and listen to everything they say.


    So after Mu got to his room he tuned in to what his invisible clone was hearing.


    Well Hung-"Have you failed?"


    Clit Oris-"I don''t think so but it''s weird with him."


    Well Hung-"What do you mean weird he''s a or he seems to be a young male and your a beautiful female what''s so complicated."


    Clit Oris-"Well...I think he might like men because every time we start talking normally it''s like a nagging voice tells him not to go on or something."


    ;)I take offense to that.


    "Who Cares! Did you hear what she said," Mu thought to the voice hysterical.


    ;)I...I know Mu but stuff like this can always happen, and if you want to we can ummm...


    "She thinks I like dudes!" Mu shouted to the ceiling.


    ;)That...that''s your fucking problem! Not the fact that it''s all a sham.


    Mu heard what the voice said and thought for a bit before saying,"Well I mean I wasn''t going to love her anyways so I don''t really care if it''s fake."


    "But imagine if she spreads this rumor I mean it could haunt me for the rest of my life," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)I''m...I''m fucking done somebody else come take over Ohh shit the mic is still on.


    Mu was weirded out by the voices weird sentence but that was just the start of his night.


    He eventually went to sleep however he didn''t sleep well that night, but then again he never slept well on his invisible bed with invisible blankets and invisible pillows.


    But that wasn''t the main problem, no that goes to the fact that he kept having the same nightmare.


    Mu would find himself back in the abyss with the voice screaming at him saying things like.


    ;)The voice you''ve been hearing is fake In fact it''s all fake your trapped inside of a giant illusion by the warlocks.


    Or


    ;)They are trying to sign a contract with me by holding you hostage inside of this giant illusion.


    And the last one was.


    ;)This is not a nightmare all of this is actually happening how much clearer could I spell it out to you.


    Mu just didn''t know what to make of his nightmare or what it was trying to tell him but he was going to investigate the next morning.


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 65 Lag/WAKE THE FUCK UP!”

    "If what my dream said is true��" Mu was thinking to himself when he was interrupted by the "abyss"


    ;)Mu *yawn* what the fuck are you doing up.


    "Oh umm nothing just uhh having trouble sleeping, oh yea and did you just write out yawn," Mu thought to the voice trying to not reveal what he was actually thinking about.


    ;)HAHA there''s that classic Mu zinger well go back to bed. This world isn''t fake.


    "What?" Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)What? Go back to bed.


    "Yea I will,"Mu thought to the voice fully awake now.


    After this Mu decided to do something he never thought he would ever have to.


    He severed his connection to the voice the one entity that has been with him through everything...honestly off a hunch.


    (A/N Which kinda makes no sense but also has to happen for him to escape but...Ahh shit I''m ruining the mood!)


    Then he ran out of the room only to find that outside his door there was nothing...then POP! The hallways appeared or I guess it''s more accurate to say they loaded in.


    This freaked Mu the fuck out and he started running even harder.


    Servants and candles started loading in as well as Mu kept running to get outside.


    But just as he stepped out he fell down into a white landscape which had nothing in it.


    Until suddenly he popped up back to the house and hit the ground as if he had tripped.


    When he looked up thinking that the weird shit had ended. The sky turned from black to light blue with clouds, and naked people started appearing around him.


    This caused Mu''s adrenaline to restart and he got off the ground to start running again.


    And he kept running and running and unwittingly ran into the center of the City right in front of the colosseum.


    Mu was throughly done with this shit and decided walk into the Colosseum to figure this shit out.


    Which again makes no sense but it''s as good as any other place I guess.


    So Mu marched himself up to the entrance of the colosseum, but right before he entered a loud voice shout.


    "Area Not Ready Yet!" And right after the voice said that a barrier appeared right in front of Mu.


    This caused the enraged Mu to get even more mad and he screamed," FUCK THAT!"


    Mu proceeded to give himself the trait


    Unstoppable Force 3:00:00


    Then punched the barrier causing it to break into a million pieces.


    The still enraged Mu then kept marching into the colosseum.


    As Mu was walking down the hallway of the colosseum, bodies started appearing in the hallway.


    The reason I say bodies is because they had no face or discernible features, they were like mannequins, just wearing different colored clothing.


    Mu just shook his head not even phased at this point.


    This caused Mu to just break and he only saw one way out.


    So he yelled," WAKE THE FUCK UP!" And proceeded to punch himself in the face with the unstoppable force.

 66 Slytherin?/Warlocks Are Back

    Mu woke up hearing a voice screaming and became really annoyed by it.


    So he looked over to see who it was and saw a person wearing a shitty looking green and black robe.


    "Shut the fuck up can''t you see I was sleeping...and who the fuck are you?" Mu asked to the robed man.


    The robed man slowly turned around and stuttered our," Your Uhh st..still dreaming."


    ;)MU MU! Thank Author your finally out of that fucking place.


    "W..what place?" Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)The fucking illusion you were in.


    "What illusion? I was just sleeping that must have been a dream," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)No these guys had your soul trapped in an illusion.


    "No...that can''t be," Mu thought to the voice assured in his belief.


    ;)How do you know?


    "Well...I would never say something a emo as "Wake The Fuck Up"," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)I mean you make a valid point but I''m sorry to say...you did.


    "What but...No no no no no, AHHH!" Mu screamed inside his mind as he finally accepted what actually happened.


    After a while of sulking Mu came to a realization," I wouldn''t have said that shit if I wasn''t in that illusion."


    ;)Umm I guess your not wrong.


    "Was I thinking to you," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Were you?


    "Well yes but...you know what fuck it who put me in that illusion they''re being thrown in the void," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Uhh well you remember those warlocks I told you about.


    "Umm I think so...are they the ones who suck off demons for a bit of power," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)Yea that''s them.


    "Are they the ones who put me in that fucking place?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)Yea they wanted to sign a contract with me by holding you hostage.


    "Why would they wanna do that?" Mu asked the voice.


    ;)Uhhh are you serious, Ohh I don''t know Mu maybe because I''m the literal abyss.


    "Oh you are, I kinda just thought you were a voice that lived in the abyss," Mu thought to the voice.


    ;)No I''m the abyss I...well I guess I never actually told you did I.


    "No you didn''t, and it would have been good to fucking know. We could have avoided all of this," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)How would me telling you what I am help from you being captured in a giant illusion?


    "Well I...fuck you I''m going to eradicate these warlocks," Mu thought to the abyss as he stood up and walked to the robed figure whose been standing stunned for 3 minutes.


    "Are you a warlock?" Mu asked the robed figure.


    The robed figure finally came back to reality and asked," Uhh if I said "no" would you believe me?"


    "No," Mu said as he sent the robed figure into the void.


    ;)Mu! You can''t just do that you didn''t know if that guy was a warlock.


    ;)Well Yes that guy was...but like take some steps to figure that out first.


    "They''re probably all wearing the same colored robes right," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Well...Yea but.


    "No buts I literally can''t fuck this up," Mu thought to the abyss as he walked out of the room.


    (A/N I got annoyed by calling the abyss, voice every time Mu talked to it so uhhh fuck it from here on out it''s abyss all the way)

 67 Memory Wipe/Johnny Kidman?

    "Where the fuck am I?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)Well...your actually in the leaders mothers basement.


    "Wait so he''s just a kid?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)Ehh 22 but hey...


    "Hey what? Hey wait are all of these guys kids?"Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)Late teens, early twenties mainly.


    "Well...shit have they like done anything wrong besides trapping me?"Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)No they''re pretty new, but the leader offered up a pretty big chunk of his soul to the strongest demon he could find to pull of that trapping stunt.


    "He''s fucked then," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Yea most of them will probably die in two weeks then comes the eternal torment, and honestly it''s just not gonna be fun for them.


    This made Mu feel bad, but then he remembered they trapped him, and finally he remembered their age so after a bit of thinking he asked the abyss, "...Author damnit how do I help them?"


    ;)What? Umm well I guess killing the demon who they signed the contract with would save them.


    "Shitty ass kids making deals with demons and shit...Alright I got a plan," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Well that was quick. What is it?


    "First off don''t be fucking sarcastic this is serious shit," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)I don''t give a shit about these kids I don''t negotiate with terrorists after all.


    "Uhh ok well the plan is for me to��" Mu thought to the abyss.


    MU''S PLAN


    1.Erase their memories.


    2.Find the demon.


    3.Kill the demon.


    4.Make some ice cream and move onto the next kingdom.


    "Alright phase 1 is the easiest so let''s get started," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Why are you talking to me I don''t help in this plan.


    "Well sure your a part of this, after all your the only one who knows these fucking tunnels," Mu thought to the abyss.


    (A/N Honestly I could tell you how Mu expertly and stealthily took down a whole cult��)


    ;)But he wouldn''t want to lie because what Mu really did was teleport every life form he detected to him and knocking them out.


    (A/N Well I mean...yea that''s what he did)


    "Is that the last of them?" Mu asked the abyss after he knocked out the last life form he could detect.


    ;)Yea that''s all of them so we erase their memories now.


    "Yea I guess, however I''m not trying to revert them back to babies so I''ll probably just get rid of everything that has to do with warlocks or magic," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Then how are you gonna chase down that demon?


    "I have a feeling you already know who it is," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Well...I mean yea I do but like maybe do some investigation or some shit.


    "I investigated and found out that you know, now who the fuck is it?" Mu asked the abyss.


    This stunned Mu for a bit before he asked, "Why does he have such a human name?"

 68 Demon Hunting/Fuck All Nut Ice Creams

    ;)No he''s probably in a demon dimension.


    "You say that like there''s more than one," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Of course there''s more than one. Some powerful demons want their own dimension and I mean what''s to stop them.


    "Well...I mean yea I guess it does kinda make sense," Mu thought to the abyss.


    After a bit of thinking Mu looked around the room and asked the abyss,"So how am I supposed to find this guy then?"


    ;)It should be pretty easy to find him just give yourself tracking abilities.


    "Do you really think it''s gonna be that easy?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)Yes...in fact 100% yes.


    "Alright then, but what should I call it?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)Just call it Godly Tracking.


    "But aren''t Demons and Gods kinda on the same level?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)Well...not really but I guess they are kinda close.


    "So what about Cognitive Configurations of Perception?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)No.


    "Alright whatever I don''t even know why I asked you," Mu thought to the voice mad that his offer was shot down.


    Mu went deep into thought until he came up with.


    Find My Demon-10:00:00


    ;)Is that a play on the fucking,"Find My iPhone".


    "Yea pretty clever right?" Mu asked the abyss while laughing.


    ;)Yea...fucking hilarious.


    "Oh quit being a grumpy pants, after all I''ve already found our guy," Mu thought to the abyss when he finally stopped laughing.


    ;)Did you just call me a "grumpy pants", also how can you be sure it''s him.


    "Yea I did, and his name is signed right above the leaders head with like a scent trail leading away from him," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)I told you it would be this easy.


    "Ahh whatever let''s just go get this guy we''ve been in this kingdom to fucking long," Mu thought to the abyss as he followed the scent trail.


    It led him to one section of the wall and when Mu placed his hand onto one of the bricks the entire wall fell apart.


    Behind it was a deep crimson red portal which presumably went to the demon dimension which Johnny Kidman was in.


    "I''ve never really left this realm before...this is gonna be weird," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Sure you''ve been in different realms before, at least like three times.


    "Yea but like...this is gonna be different because other life forms are gonna be living there," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)I guess.


    Mu proceeded to walk into the portal and appeared in...a bedroom.


    Then his entire body shook violently and he threw up for about twenty seconds straight.


    ;)Oh yea I forgot to tell you about the gravity change.


    "Would have been good to��" Mu was thinking to the abyss until another round of vomiting ensued.


    ;)Sorry.


    Gravity Control 3:00:00


    Did he stop vomiting and notice a figure watching him from the bed.


    Mu also noticed that the scent trail led straight to this entity.


    So Mu stepped away from his vomit pile and asked the entity...haha titty.


    "You Johnny Kidman?"


    The entity proceeded to step out from the shadows in what seems to be pajamas and said," Uhh...yea..oh wait shoot. YES MORTAL I AM THE MIGHTY JOHNNY KIDMAN AND YOU HAVE COME TO YOUR DEATH!"


    Mu then said," Good," and crushed it with gravity killing it immediately.


    ;)Yo what the fuck Mu!


    "What? I''m here to kill him...so I killed him," Mu thought to the voice as he started walking back towards the portal.


    "So what...I want my ice cream," Mu thought to the voice as he stepped back through the portal.


    ;)You cold heartless bastard.


    "Hey don''t forget this guy was dealing in kids souls I didn''t want to talk to him," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)But that realm could have been so full of uniqueness and well torture but...


    "Exactly now...what ice cream am I getting and please no nut based ones they all suck," Mu thought to the abyss as he walked out of the basement, and onto the next kingdom.

 69 One Liners/Knife Acquired

    When suddenly an ear piercing scream came from the tree line and when Mu looked over he saw a woman being chased by three men.


    ;)Ignore her.


    "What? Why the fuck would I do that?" Mu asked the abyss as time stopped so that they can talk.


    ;)Well she''s probably in cahoots to rob you or she purposefully orchestrated this to kill you in your sleep.


    "That sounds awfully convoluted to be real," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Sure it is but it''s probably the truth...I mean do you really think the great and glorious Author would make a situation as cliche as this.


    "Well...your probably right. However, she can''t really hurt me and if your wrong I''m basically killing her," Mu thought to the abyss as he stepped out to help the girl.


    ;)They always find ways to hurt you...they always do.


    "What?" Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)What?


    "Whatever...do I still have gravity control?" Mu thought to the abyss as he checked himself.


    Find My Demon-9:00:00


    Gravity Control-2:00:00


    "Sweet...I guess I''ll send them into orbit," Mu thought to himself.


    ;)That''s awfully severe.


    "Quit commenting on my personal thoughts!" Mu thought to the abyss.


    Time started speeding up again as the conversation was over.


    It didn''t take the girl long to get to Mu and she "hid" behind him in what could only be described as a rehearsed move.


    All the while Mu was coming up with one liners he wanted to say.


    Some of the best rejected ones would have to be.


    ?Haha Fuck you!


    ?Say Hi to the ISS for me.


    ?no.


    But the one that he went with was.


    "What goes up...Can fucking stay there!" Mu screamed at the men before launching them into space.


    ;)Ehh I rate it a 5.


    "Out of what?" Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Wouldn''t you like to know.


    "Well...yea it''s kinda why I asked," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Oh well...10 I rate it 5/10.


    "Fuck you that was at least��," Mu was thinking to the abyss when he was interrupted by a hot feeling in his back.


    ;)Immortality Quick!


    "On it," Mu thought to the abyss a split second before he gave himself.


    Immortality- ��


    "I''m just gonna keep that going from now on out," Mu thought to the abyss as he turned around to see his attacker.


    He looked down at her still in the thrusting position.


    Mu proceeded to pull the knife out of his back and say,"Nice knife...think I''ll keep it."


    Then he sent her ass into space.

 70 Change of Scenery/Flying

    ;)A Forest?


    "Yea that or mountains seem to be the only kind of climate I''ve seen on this new world," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Well the sea and islands too, but yea I kinda see your meaning.


    "Like where is the deserts, rainforests, and canyons," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Why would you wish to go through a fucking desert.


    "I don''t know...change of scenery maybe," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Ok...well how about a death desert with a canyon in the middle of it which has a rainforest at the bottom.


    "Well yea...that would be work but it doesn''t exist," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Sure it does...just go 1 kilometer west of here.


    "Wait...did you just use the metric system also there''s no way that exists and is that close to me," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)You''ve been using it to, and yes it does exist check the map.


    "Well...yea I guess I have," Mu thought to the abyss as he took out the map.


    "Oh yea there is a desert," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)See told you...and I thought you didn''t know how to use a map or anything about geography.


    "Huh no I don''t, so I enchanted the map to tell me where I am and everything around me," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Huh...When?


    ;)Oh ok...you wanna go to the desert now.


    "One step ahead of you, I''m already walking in the direction," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)West?


    "One of those Yea," Mu thought to the abyss.


    It didn''t take Mu long to get to the desert and it shocked him with its size.


    "Holy shit look at the size of this fucking thing!" Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)So your gonna need heat resistance,shoes that don''t sink in the sand, an unlimited water canteen, and...


    The abyss kept rattling off essentials that Mu would need in order to survive in the desert until Mu butted in saying.


    "Or I could just fly over," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)What...but, but I thought you said you wanted to enjoy the scenery and the journey.


    "Well yea but there''s no reason I can''t do that from the sky," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Then...THEN WHY THE FUCK HAVEN''T WE BEEN DOING THIS FOR EVERY GODDAMN KINGDOM!


    "Well I wanted to enjoy the scenery and journey of course, and also they weren''t scorching hot death deserts," Mu thought to the abyss.


    But the abyss didn''t respond and instead just kept repeating "Do you know how much shit we could have avoided," over and over.

 71 Or Else/Nailing I

    When he asked the abyss,"Hey what kind of animals do you think live here?"


    ;) Probably scorpions, mice, uhh and giant worms.


    "What? Giant worms, I can understand the other two but there is no fucking way there are giant worms," Mu thought to the abyss shaking his head.


    ;)We''ll see.


    "Is this that fucking foreshadowing shit again?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)Uhh...no.


    "Oh...ok," Mu thought to the voice as he kept flying.


    ;) Haha what he doesn''t know��


    "What was that! I fucking knew it, it was foreshadowing," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;) Was that he was a great person...asshole.


    "Oh...well then I guess I won''t put on my giant worm repellent," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;) Cool, cool...I don''t care.


    "Ok then I''m gonna put it on," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)NO!...umm don''t do that or...else.


    "Or else wha��" Mu was thinking to the abyss when he ran headlong into something knocking himself out.


    An unknown amount of time later Mu woke up and realized he was shackled in a room.


    This immediately woke him up but he didn''t overreact because this has happened to him so many times he might as well be waking up in an inn.


    "Ahh Author dammit...every fucking time," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Huh, oh your finally awake.


    "Yea...where the fuck did I end up this time?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)No hello? Whatever your in the back of a carriage.


    "A carriage...in the desert," Mu thought to the abyss as he sat up.


    ;)Yea...well now that you say it I guess this is more of a sled.


    "Wait how do you know this?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)I saw it when they were dragging you in here.


    "What? I thought you like used my eyesight or some shit," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Huh...Where did you get that idea? All I use you for it to carry a piece of myself which allows me to come into this place.


    "Really...I would have liked to have known that sooner," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Well it takes time to flush out the backstory and traits of such a complex character as I.


    "Yea sure...wait you said come into this place does that mean you can make yourself a body and shit?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)Yea, but that kinda ruins the whole omniscient voice thing I''m going for.


    "Yea because your really nailing that one," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Fuck you.

 72 Naming/They’re all...

    ;)Have you ever actually been shackled?


    "I don''t know...but I know I''ve been kidnapped before," Mu thought to the abyss as he stood up.


    "Fuck my feet fell asleep," Mu thought to the abyss as he started shacking them.


    ;)Ok...I don''t care.


    "Really I cant start like one normal conversation with you," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Fuck normal, you can literally delete reality now.


    "Yea but why would I want to do that?" Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)I don''t know...because you can.


    "Whatever, you ready to leave?"Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)Yea lets go...wait why are you asking me?


    "I don''t know...because I can," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Ok...real fucking clever.


    Mu started laughing as he gave himself the ability...Open.


    Open-3:00:00


    ;)Really! Your not even trying anymore.


    "Of course I''m trying...its just that not every name needs to be unique," Mu thought to the abyss as he walked out of the sledarriage.


    ;)The fuck is a sledarriage?


    (A/N...sled and carriage mixed together.)


    ;)Your even worse than Mu.


    Mu took a step out of the sledarriage and immediately broke out in sweat and his eyes burned.


    "Fuck fuck fuck!" Mu screamed as he fell back into the sledarriage with the door closing behind him.


    Mu kept cussing while giving himself multiple healing effects.


    Mu felt like a bucket of cold water was dunked on his head and he immediately sighed.


    ;)What did I tell you about heat resistance?


    "I forgot," Mu thought to the abyss as he gave himself Heat Immunity.


    Heat Immunity-��


    ;)What about UV?


    "...Uhh shouldn''t immortality take care of that," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)This is not a joke Mu you could get skin cancer.


    "...I can make an entirely new reality do you think I care about getting skin cancer?" Mu asked the abyss?


    ;)Well...no, but it''s still a serious issue.


    "Yea it is but I''m a...Well I don''t know what I am but I don''t think I''m gonna get skin cancer," Mu thought to the abyss as he walked back out of the sledarriage.


    The heat didn''t effect Mu this time but he fell back into the sledarriage again this time with a giant hole in his chest.


    Mu started feeling numb and was fading in and out of consciousness.


    But right before Mu went under he looked around and said,


    "They''re all..."

 73 Alone/Maybe Not All Of Them

    ;)It''s probably just poison knocking him out..the hole in his chest doesn''t matter.


    ;)But...But what if it does I..I Uhh no the Author wouldn''t kill him.


    ;)But why, why wouldn''t he no..no..no..no Mu!


    ;)Please...please wake the fuck up man.


    ;)I...I can''t do it again I..I don''t wanna be alone.


    ;)Mu please...please don''t be dead.


    "Who the fuck are you begging?" A voice asked the abyss.


    ;)Mu?


    "Yea it''s me..quit fucking crying you...uhh bitch," Mu thought to the abyss as he raised his head and looked at the hole in his chest.


    ;)Oh thank Author your alive.


    "You saw me put Immortality on infinite right?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)Yea..yea I guess I just got scared.


    "Huh I couldn''t hear anything except the last thing you said, what were you scared of?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)Uhh...I was scared that I wouldn''t be able to fuck with you anymore.


    "Yeaaa...you totally weren''t scared of being alone," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)So you did fucking hear it!


    "Alright yea I did I just wanted you to admit it," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Your a fucking asshole. But I am glad your not dead.


    "I''m glad your not dead!" Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)...what?


    "I don''t know I just felt like I had to get the last sentimental word in," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Ok...so what are we going to do about the��


    "Scorpions they are scorpion people...I was gonna say that before you know," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Yea I know, I was there, I saw them too.


    "Yea but I felt like I should be the one to say it because you know I''m finishing my earlier sentence," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Sure...ok what are we gonna do about them?


    "Kill them...obviously," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Even the woman, children, sick, old, and dying?


    "Well Uhh maybe not all of them that would make me kinda feel bad," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Alright that''s what I thought...you ready?


    "Yea just give me one second," Mu thought to the abyss as he gave himself.


    Invulnerability- ��


    And


    Fuck You-3:00:00


    ;)What! Why would you give yourself invulnerability that completely gets rid of any suspense or competition.


    "Yea...it''s why I did it. I am fucking done with this suspense and competition shit it hurts to much," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)I..I mean I guess I can understand that but what is "Fuck You".


    "Oh yea "Fuck You" allows me to kills anything I want," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Ohh...why name it "Fuck You"?


    "Because fuck you and also why not?" Mu asked the abyss right back.

 74 Let’s Just Skip This Part/Finally

    "Yea, hey why does it feel like your saying that a lot?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)Saying what?


    ""Are you ready?"," Mu...


    (A/N How the fuck am I supposed to phrase this...maybe like this)


    Asked back the question which the abyss asked him before Mu asked it back...paraphrased?


    ;)Are you having a stroke?


    "Are you gonna answer the question or not?" Mu asked to the abyss.


    ;)Was it a question?...Whatever, umm am I?


    ;)Well it''s a good way to start, but whatever...can we just like Mu-ve on.


    "I hate you...but sure," Mu thought to the abyss.


    After all those meta jokes Mu decided he needed a dose of "reality" and also he was ready to kill some bugs.


    Mu gathered up all the power in his legs and kicked the metal door.


    Right before his foot landed though Mu realized he hadn''t given himself any physical abilities to make himself stronger.


    So he desperately tried to stop his foot mid-kick, but it was to late so Mu braced himself for the pain.


    A BANG! came from the door and it didn''t budge...but neither did Mu and he didn''t feel any pain.


    "Huh...oh right I put on a pain nullification thing," Mu thought to himself.


    "Cool,I guess...man this is kinda boring," Mu thought to himself.


    ;)Told you no challenges and punishment is boring.


    "Did you say that?...Also I thought that to myself," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)I''m pretty sure I did...anyways it is isn''t it.


    "Yea I guess so, but I really don''t wanna feel pain...however it is kinda boring when I don''t," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Mu...Sometimes you gotta believe in yourself to make the best cracked omelette.


    "...What?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)What I''m trying to say is...pain is simply an egg and you...you are a chicken.


    "Are you...are you calling me a pussy?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)No...but you are a bitch.


    "Fuck you! I can take the pain," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Sure you can.


    "I''ll...I''ll prove it to you!" Mu thought to the abyss as he turned off the invulnerability.


    Then Mu proceeded to kick the door again but this time he felt every bit of the pain.


    "FUCK!" Mu screamed as he held his broken toes.


    *Fade away*


    ;)Author your amazing at making filler aren''t you?


    (A/N Filler?)


    (A/N Dude...this whole story is filler. Did..did you think there was a plot?)


    ;)Uhh no...why is there one?


    (A/N No.)


    ;)Oh...cool, so the lack of a plot is the plot?


    ;)Oh sorry.


    (A/N Just let me have this)


    ;)No.


    (A/N Fuck you)

 75 Outside/Not A Dragon 2

    ;)Because your fucking retarded, but we need to get past this and get out of this sledarriage.


    "No!No! I want to talk about this," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Really?...ok but we gotta be quick.


    "Why? Why do we have to be quick? Why can''t we talk about our problems in order to lead a healthy relationship," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Oh Author dammit...because that''s boring.


    "Boring...boring to who? Because it''s not boring to me and if it''s boring to you then you can go suck a dick!" Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Fuck y...you know what. We''re getting off track, what is your problem?


    "...why do you never support me?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)Huh...what do you mean?


    "Why is it that every idea I have is dumb to you?" Mu clarified for the abyss.


    ;)Because...because that''s like the dynamic. You know.


    "What does that mean?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)It when...like you say or I say something dumb, and then we get proven wrong and it''s funny.


    "Ohh...yea I guess it is kinda like that," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)So...you wanna leave this sledarriage?


    "Yea," Mu answered the abyss.


    Then Mu walked up to the door and just pulled on it since he had already unlocked it with Open.


    The first thing Mu realized when he walked out was the shade, then the trees, and finally the waterfall.


    "W..what the fuck," Mu said out loud.


    ;)MU! Shut the fuck up! What if they hear you?


    "Let them hear me, the fuck they going to do?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)Well...I mean yea you do have poison resistance on now.


    "Also we''re the only sledarriage here," Mu thought to the abyss as he pulled out the map.


    ;)Oh...yea I guess we are. So where are we?


    "Wer..we''re in the canyon," Mu answered the abyss.


    ;)Really? Why would they do that?


    "I don''t know," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Well there''s gotta be a reas...


    Just then Mu fell over because the ground was shaking like an earthquake was happening.


    And from the waterfall came a giant beast who was looking at Mu with a hunger.


    ;)That''s the reason...there''s a fucking dragon here.


    "Yea, and that''s not a dragon," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Are..are we doing this again.


    "I''m just saying you called it a dragon and it''s not. It''s more like a lizard or a Komodo," Mu clarified for the abyss.


    ;)Mu...what comes after Komodo.


    "Big fucking lizard," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)No it''s dragon. Komodo Dragon.


    "IT''S NOT A FUCKING DRAGON!" Mu yelled at the abyss.


    ;)Ok fuck...if you feel that strongly about it then it''s not a dragon. So what are we gonna do about this guy?


    "Thank you, and kill him I guess," Mu thought to the abyss.


    "Do...do you think I give a fuck, about the local ecosystem?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)No...I guess you wouldn''t.

 76 It Is A Valid Reason/Bone Go Crunch

    ;)Huh...why? I thought you didn''t care about the ecosystem.


    "I don''t but...it''s not about that," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Then why?


    "I was thinking and maybe he..she...fucking it may have a kid," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Really? You didn''t care about killing the fucking scorpion people and they definitely have kids.


    "I didn''t kill the scorpion people," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)No, you didn''t. But you would have.


    "Well they fucking deserve it, but this thing hasn''t hurt me," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Whatever, so are you going to kill it?


    "No, I don''t feel like it," Mu thought to the abyss in a hushed tone.


    ;)Ohhh so that''s why..you just don''t feel like it.


    "Shut up! It''s a valid reason," Mu thought to the abyss as the giant lizard finally reached them.


    Mu then gave himself.


    Time Stop-3:00:00


    Or as the abyss wanted to call it.


    The Time Gods Last Breath-3:00:00


    "That doesn''t even...whatever," Mu thought to the abyss as he used Time Stop and walked around the lizard.


    Behind it was a cave which seemed barely big enough to hold the giant lizard.


    And at the back of the cave was a giant hole piled high with the bones and bodies of the giant lizards previous food.


    However, at the very top of the pile was what looked like a human body.


    "Is that a human?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)I don''t know...also how are you seeing.


    "Uhhh...I don''t know," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Also if you stopped time then you would have stopped air and gasses and shit from moving...how are you breathing?


    "Listen...quit fucking questioning shit, and answer my question," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Uhh...ok. Yea I guess that does look like a human.


    "Think he''s alive?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)I don''t fucking know...go check.


    "Alright," Mu thought to the abyss as he jumped down.


    But right before he landed Mu realized something," I didn''t put on invuln...AHHH FUCK ME FUCK ME!"


    ;)Ahh bones shouldn''t do that.


    "YOU FUCKING THINK!" Mu screamed at the abyss before he passed out from the pain.


    (A/N FUCKING DAMN IT WHY DID YOU RUIN IT!)


    (A/N Maybe...yea)

 77 Heart/Doctor Mu

    "Ahh! I''m u...AHHHH, Pain nullification! Pain nullification..." Mu shouted.


    Pain Nullification 3:00:00


    "...Haha...fuck me that hurt," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Yea, it probably did.


    "Probably...you fucking know it did," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Well Yea I do, but probably sounds better.


    "No it doesn''t!" Mu screamed at the abyss as he stood up.


    ;)Whatever...go check and see if that body is alive or not.


    "Ahh...shit. I just remembered something," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)What?


    "Time is stopped," Mu told the abyss.


    ;)So?


    "So! I can''t check and see if he or she is alive," Mu clarified for the abyss.


    ;)...ho..you..you fuckin..I''m done!


    "OH! Wait I can just unfreeze it," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)*Cocks Gun*


    "Ahh what are you fourteen. You think that''s funny?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)Well..I mean kinda.


    "It''s not," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Well who are you to say that...also can you just check the body...please.


    "I''m just saying...and uhh sure," Mu thought to the abyss.


    Mu walked up to the human shaped body on top of the mountain of corpses and bent down next to it.


    He put his fingers under the nose of the human figure and unfroze time.


    ;)What are you doing?


    "Checking to see it it''s breathing," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)...why?


    "Because if it''s breathing then it''s alive...duh," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)No I mean why don''t you give yourself a detect life skill and then you won''t have to do this.


    "...oh well, I guess that would be easier," Mu thought to the abyss as he gave himself.


    Cardiac Monitor 3:00:00


    ;)What?


    "What?" Mu asked the abyss.


    ;)Why did you name it so weird.


    "Uhh cardiac means heart..so heart monitor," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Then why not just say heart monitor?


    "Maybe I wanna sound official," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Are...are you a doctor or a nurse?


    "No...but does that mean I can''t be official?" Mu asked the abyss defensively.


    ;)Well...yea.


    "Fuck you! Also, you do this too," Mu thought the abyss.


    ;)Do what?


    "Complicate names, don''t think I forgot the Time Lords Last Breath," Mu answered the abyss.


    ;)I''ll have you know that my names elevate the conversation and make sense.


    "Sure they do," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)FUCK YO...


    Before the abyss could continue yelling at Mu a sudden sound split the air, it was a single high-pitch note.


    That signifies that somebody...is flatlining.


    "SHIT, we''re loosing him..her..it fuck!" Mu screamed into the air.


    "Get me 200cc''s of a defibrillator!" Mu screamed into the air again.


    Defibrillator 3:00:00


    "Shut the fuck up! Cant you see this man..woman.. things life is on the line?" Mu yelled at the abyss.


    "3...2...1," Mu yelled as he prepped himself to try to restart the heart of the human figure.


    And after many many failed attempt.


    Mu put his hands at his sides and said," I''ve done everything I could...time of death 4:20 P.M on the 4th of April." Then Mu started to cry.


    ;)...can''t you bring things back to life?


    "Oh yea I can," Mu said out loud.

 78 Swing and a Miss/Boned

    ;)Ok...and.


    "And...what if it fucks up," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Don''t let it.


    "Yea...Yea alright let''s do this!" Mu thought to the abyss.


    Revive 3:00:00


    After, Mu gave himself Revive he bent down and slapped the human figure while screaming,"WAKE THE FUCK UP!"


    Then the human figure bolted up right and a high pitched voice screamed,"SHUT THE FUCK UP!", and then decked Mu.


    ;)Oh shit.


    Mu felt no pain from the punch because he still had Pain Nullification on, but he was still pissed at being punched.


    "Why did you hit me?" Mu asked the human figure in as calm a voice as he could.


    "Because you were shouting while I was asleep," the human figure said.


    Mu decided to get some revenge and on this human figure and said,"Actually you were dead...so haha, fuck you."


    ;)Damn...you really showed it.


    "Shut the fuck up," Mu thought to the abyss.


    Before they could start fighting the human figure asked Mu," Were dead, how was I dead if I''m alive right now?"


    "I brought you back to life," Mu said while walking to the side of the hole.


    "Then I owe you my life," the human figure said as it started undressing.


    "Yea I guess you do but..."Mu stopped talking as he turned around and saw something that shocked him.


    "...bones?" Mu said out loud.


    ;)FUCK!


    The figure out it''s hands in front of itself like it was trying to cover its chest and said in a shy voice," D..don''t look at my rib cage so intensely."


    Mu and the abyss both thought,


    "Eww."


    ;)Eww.


    At the same time.


    "I..I thought I was boned in here but...maybe you have a way out," the "skeleton?" Said as it pulled its hands away from its rib cage...slowly.


    "Uhh...Yea I do but, can you put your clothes back on," Mu said.


    "You..you really do, I thought I was in some grave danger," the skeleton said.


    ;)I hate you...with every fiber of my being.


    "Yea...just uhh grab on,"Mu said to the skeleton as he gave himself.


    Big Jump 3:00:00


    The skeleton proceeded to run over to Mu and grab around his waist.


    "Y..you can grab my shoulders," Mu told the skeleton.


    "No...I''m good," the skeleton said as it rubbed its skull on Mu''s stomach and...purred?


    ;)*long groan*

 79 Mu Sensible” Plan/The What Now

    ;)Oh my Author does she not shut up!


    "I know...I know, but she''s leading us to the Undead Kingdom," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Why do you even want to go there?


    "I already told you my plan," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Yea and it made no sense, now explain it again.


    "...no, fuck you my plan is completely sensible," Mu thought to the abyss mad.


    ;)Mu.


    "What?" Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Tell me your plan.


    "No...not until you say my plan is good," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)I don''t even know...you know what your plan is good. Now tell me why the fuck you want to go the Undead Kingdom.


    "To make shit tons of money," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Ho...how are you going to make shit tons of money?


    "I''m gonna make coffins...for the undead," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)W...why would the undead want...coffins.


    "Because they''re dead," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)Mu...what do you think undead means.


    "Uhh it means not dead right," Mu thought to the abyss as something pointy wrapped around his hand.


    Then he heard a very quiet," Mhm...meaty."


    ;)Mu I don''t think this is a good idea.


    "No I''m sure it will be ok," Mu thought to the abyss in a shaky voice as he pulled his hand out of the "female" skeletons.


    ;)What if they don''t even have money? I mean what would they use it for?


    "I''m sure they have some form of currency for like goods and services and shit," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;) Mu...they''re skeletons what kind of goods and services would they use?


    "I don''t fucking know maybe they brush their entire bodies with a big toothbrush or some shit," Mu thought to the abyss.


    ;)You know what just ask the skeleton we have with us.


    "Alright...I will," Mu thought to the abyss as he tapped the "female" skeleton on the shoulder bones.


    "Hey does the Undead Kingdom have any kind of thing that''s exchanged for something else?" Mu asked the "female" skeleton.


    "Hmm...just the souls of the innocent," the "female" skeleton said nonchalant.


    "The what now?" Mu asked the "female" skeleton.


    "I said the souls of the innocent," the "female" skeleton said again.


    ;)Yea...real good idea Mu.