I wake up sprawled on top of Rowan. His arm was wrapped tight around my waist, and half my body was


    on top of his


    Slowly, I lift my head from his chest. This was another new thing for us. The intimacy our position


    projected, you would think that we’re in love. Only I knew the truth. There was love in our marriage yes,


    but it was one sided.


    I get up slowly. I didn’t want to wake him up. I needed time to myself. Time to try and catch on to


    whatever the hell was happening. I feel like my life has been turned upside down since I woke up from


    thata.


    It has been two days, but those two days have been a rollercoaster of events. Now I was reeling from the


    rush. Not really sure if I should trust my eyes or my heart.


    I spot the bottle of milk on his bedside table.


    Iris woke up like three times. The first two times, I fed her. Thest time I remember him telling me to go


    back to sleep. That he would take care of her. I was tired so I didn’t argue at al


    all.


    Putting on my bathrobe, I tip toe out of the room. I check on Iris and Noah before going downstairs. It


    was


    fairly early in the morning and given it was on a Saturday, Noah didn’t have school today.


    I get to the kitchen only to find Teresa.


    “Good morning, Madam” she greets with a smile while cleaning the counter top.


    I give her what I hope is a gentle smile “Good morning too Teresa, and please call me Ava. Madam is too


    formal”


    “Did you need something?” she stops and focuses on me, ready to do anything I asked her,


    “No, but if I’m not imposing, I’d like to make breakfast for my family”


    Her smiles turns blinding and she rods her head.


    “Not at all. I’m sure Noah will be ecstatic. He keptining that I don’t make his pancakes the


    mom does” she winks at me.


    way his


    I just chuckle, because I can totally see Noah saying that. My smile slips off my face when I think of how


    hard it must have been for him when I was in aa.


    Teresa excuses herself and I start working on making breakfast. For some weird reason it felt so strange


    Rowan rarely ate anything I cooked. He used to miss breakfast and dinner. The only time he would eat


    something I made was when Noah insisted we have a meal together. Even then he would take a few


    spoons and then dere that he was full.


    It used to hurt a lot. Knowing that he didn’t want anything from me. It was like anything from me was


    polson. I soon got over it. It hurt, but I learned to live with it for the sake of Noah.


    I tried my hardest to shield Noah from the disrespect and disregard Rowan showed me. Noah thought


    we


    were happy and I would do anything to make sure he was. Including faking marital bliss.


    I


    Pushing those thoughts away, I focus on making breakfast.


    Who knows, maybe witnessing my almost death changed something inside Rowan. I love Rowan despite


    everything he has done to me and maybe this was our second chance at happiness.


    Minutester, I fling the flour to the side in frustration as I feel my eyes begin to tear. Why was this so


    goddamn hard?


    “Hey, what’s wrong?” Rowan’s voicees from behind me.


    His arm wrap around my waist and he brings me to his chest. With his other hand he pushes my hair


    away.


    andys his chin on my shoulder.


    I would have surprises at this tender action if I weren’t frustrated.


    “I used to know how to make the kind of pancakes Noah likes like the back of my hand. Now I can’t


    remember a damn thing! I can’t remember the secret ingredient I used” I cry and hold on to the counter


    afraid that I’d break down if I let go.


    “It’s okay, don’t worry too much about it” he tries to calm me, but it’s doesn’t work.


    “You don’t get it” I wrench myself from his arms. “It’s not just that. I can’t read the measurement either.


    Neither can I remember the how you like your coffee! Damn it! Even some words are a bit difficult for me


    read”


    I can stop myself from crying. I feel so useless. The things that used to be easy for me, now aren’t. I find


    it harder to read numbers. Every time I tried looking at the measurement for the past thirty minutes, my


    mind bes jumbled.


    It’s like my brain can’tprehend what the hell I’m seeing.


    “Shss, it’s okay Ava. Everything is going to be okay” he reassures me. “Don’t be too hard on yourself”


    He turns me around to face him. He is shirtless, wearing only a pair of sweatpants that hang low on his


    I swallow as a different kind of frustration starts humming inside me. I rip my eyes from his body and


    focus on his eyes.


    watch silently, unable to move as he bends his head. My breath hitches as his lips connect with mine.


    I gasp at the intensity of his kiss. That gives him the opportunity to slip his tongue inside. I get lost as our


    mouths mesh and our tongues tangle.


    One of his hands holds my waist while the other my neck. I hold on to his waist in a desperate attempt to


    stand up straight.


    1 get lost in the kiss. Get lost in his scent. Get lost in all that is Rowan wood. The moment was perfect


    and


    I thought nothing could ruin it. That is until I hear a strangled cry from behind us.


    I reluctantly stop kissing Rowan and turn around. My eyes sh with the teary ones of a woman I


    thought


    I’d never see again.


    Emma


    What the hell was she doing in my house?